Kingdumb maladies gone bad ... er, I mean worse

by Frequent_Fader_Miles 14 Replies latest jw friends

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  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  Let's face it, those kindumb songs aren't award-winning compositions. But one would reason that since the songs aint so hot, at least some emphasis would be placed on the quality of singing right? WRONG! Emphasis is apparently reserved exclusively for talks and field circus.

  At one of my former congos, for the dedication of the Kingdom Hall, the elders decided to form a choir. Of course, only elderettes, elderette wannabes, and pioneers need apply (regardless of singing ability). On the day in question there was a capacity audience to witness the supreme debacle. OMG! Talk about cacophony! The singing was absolutely horrendous! It was so painful to listen to, that I can't even recall the Kingdumb song they sung. And to make the affair even worse, the congregation Secretary conductor stood there waving a broken radio antenna wildly in front of the group as they assaulted our ears!

  I couldn't hold it ... I bust out laughing.
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  JH

  It was so painful to listen to

  
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  bigmouth

  One of my old congs. had a small KH (Waiheke Island). We had a piano played by a feeble old biddy or my mother who had a rudimentry ability with the damn thing. And a brother who played an alto sax in the Glenn Miller style. When he got testifying on that horn you couldn't hear the racket from the twenty or so there. Actually you were deaf for half an hour.
  
  By contrast, in Hamilton, we had a brother who was a concert pianist. That man was spectacular on the ivories. He always played the songs unaccompanied and most of us just shut up and listened. How he made the Kingdum Maladies sound so good I'll never know.
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  Junction-Guy

  That's hilarious FFM
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  Billy the Ex-Bethelite

  Remember the WT CD Singing Kingdom Songs? Here's some inside info, from a Bethelite of the era... ME [cue the applause]

  I'm refering to the US English version. There was a German version which was actually quite good. The English, well, when announced to the US Bethel family, we were all excited and eagerly picked up a copy. OUCH! Terrible! It was so bad, and so many were returned, that it was removed from the catalog and a whole dumpster load was sent to be destroyed. J. S., who was in charge of Audio Services and was one of the 'singers' on the CD, was later reassigned to Patterson Wastebasket Maintenance.

  Years later, Audio/Video Services tried again on a singing project. Some speculation on the details here, but many of the songs were okay, some were absolutely fabulous! The orchestration was outstanding and the talent included, among others, George Benson, a cousin of Whitney Houston, a sister who had toured with Earth, Wind, and Fire, a sister who sang for Walt Disney, Inc. (way better than Celine Dion!), and others that were 'cry until you wet yourself' fabulous. When submitted to Teaching Committee and Gubberly Blobby, they decided it was too 'worldly'. Most of you are aware that these songs were leaked outside Bethel, and I don't think the source was ever found. [cue the applause] No, it wasn't me. It was in such wide circulation with such outragous lies attached to the stories that this appeared in the Kingdumb Misery:

  ***

  km3/05p.3Announcements***

  ? A number of publishers have telephoned the branch office regarding certain recordings of Kingdom songs sung in a popular style that are presently being circulated among Jehovah’s Witnesses. They wonder if these recordings have the organization’s approval. We are aware of these recordings and would like to inform you that they do not have our approval. Please do not circulate or download these recordings from the Internet. We trust this information will clarify matters.

  Of course, after this, EVERYONE wanted to find a copy.

  Anyway, if you want good music, check this thread http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/27/148424/1.ashx and welcome bluesteel aboard JWD [cue the appluase]
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  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  They wonder if these recordings have the organization’s approval

  Yeah right! They were probably calling to ask for more. You know how the Society bends the truth ....
• 

  WTWizard

  I know the Watchtower Society's stand on music, even though I never saw it in so many words. If a piece is even mildly enjoyable, it is forbidden. They only want people to listen to the original recordings from the Watchtower Society itself, not some creatively done remakes. If someone has so much talent that they can breathe some life in that sxxx, those humanoids in the Governing Body are going to envy it and tell the people to not listen to it.

  That leaves you with 225 songs (with all the "new light" coming forth, they might have to compose some new Kingdumb Maladies and delete some that have fallen into "old light" status). Either way, all those new CDs are nothing more than remixed cat sxxx, and it shows. I remember when Disc 9 came out, and they were ranting about how the Society didn't have to come up with such "beautiful" new music when times were so close to the end. It was all the same Maladies, remixed and repackaged (and it was NOT beautiful--I don't even know how it qualifies as music).

  Ultimately, they are going to have to do something about the songs that are falling into old light. That is happening so fast these days that they might have to delete many Kingdumb Maladies and create some all-new ones, and then tell people to destroy all old CDs and song books for old light. (Of course, they don't want copies and creative remakes of the now-outdated songs circulating). And, eventually they are going to come right out and tell us that we are only to listen to Kingdumb Sxxx in lieu of real music, the latest batch at that, either in a Kool Aid Puketower study article with disfellowshipping attached or in a series of talks that the hounders will all be directed to hound everyone into getting rid of everything else, one CD at a time.
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  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  they might have to delete many Kingdumb Maladies and create some all-new ones, and then tell people to destroy all old CDs and song books for old light

  LOL! Create new ones? How about they just discard the "old light" with no replacements, then there'll be less and less crappy music to deal with.
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  lawrence

  Billy - thanks for your memories.

  My opinion - Dump the religion, its gestapos, its lies, false prophecies and crap songs. In lieu... sing 'Three blind mice' and continue the circle jerk.
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  Frequent_Fader_Miles

  In lieu... sing 'Three blind mice' and continue the circle jerk.

  Hmmmm ... that song's perfect as a tribute to the body of elders.