Respect-O-Meter (page 2)

JK666

"As we try to control and squeeze the respect others have for us, most of it ends up running out between our fingers," - JK

(I love quoting myself)

JK

****purps...this is an excellent topic from a poster I have respect for....and I hope you dont mind me putting my 2cents in about respect.

EDITED by Snakes: I have moved what I originally posted off of purps' topic...before it gets out of hand.

Don't do my any more favors!!!

purps

Abandoned

Interesting post Purps. The problem with our community is that we don't see each other face to face. A good deal of what I use to determine how much respect to give someone else comes from visible cues. On here, it's harder because I don't automatically know whether the person is being facetious when the say something. I can't look into their eyes to see if they even understood what I was talking about or how important it was to me. It's simply harder.

purplesofa

Abandoned,

I agree, on the board, we don't know the body language to determine just how messages come across.

I rather meet in person esp for business or important matters as I need the eye contact and just that connection.

I am getting better on the phone, although, I rather be online than the phone.

Thanks for yours and everyone's comments.

purps

Vivamus

I say it is the International Day of Human Rights.

Thats respect too.

purplesofa

"It is not what he has, or even what he does which expresses the worth of a man, but what he is."

Henri Frédéric Amiel

thumbs up!!!

AlmostAtheist

>>We were forced to respect an organization that was undeserving.

There's alot to this. You can't "force" someone to respect you. But you CAN force someone to ACT like they respect you. After years of being forced to act like we respected the 'tower, and the elders, and the "spiritually strong" among us, we could have easily lost what it meant to respect someone.

I'm only now, three years hence, starting to find some of these more subtle "hits" my personality took as a result of association with JW's. Thanks for an excellent topic!

Dave

Lease

wow! everyone here has such great comments and insights. thinking about what i have read....we can only demonstrate as much respect for others as we have for ourselves....hhhmmmm. does that make sense? well, i guess i have to ponder this more. it is late 11 p.m. !

hmike

I'd like to use this opportunity to say that two members I have a great deal of respect for are Leolaia and Narkissos. They obviously put in a considerable amount of work on their posts with the research and composing, their formatting makes their work easy to read, their posts are of a high level of scholarship and very informative, their command of a vast amount of resources is amazing, and they always give good support for their positions. But what impresses me most is their commitment to sound scholarship to the extent that they will not tolerate the use of poor scholarship from anyone in support of a position, even when they actually agree with the position itself.

That doesn't mean I always agree with them.

cognizant dissident

I don't think there is any difference between self-respect and self-esteem. In my dictionary they are synonyms. I think Amiel's arguments trying to distinguish the two just muddy the issues. To respect yourself or to respect someone else means the same thing: "to have deferential regard for, to esteem, an appreciation of worth.

These are just terms to express what it is we value. They can apply to anything. Life: Do I value all human life? Or do I just value my own and treat other's as expendable as in Amiel's example of criminal types. Do I value and respect my property I have worked hard for? Great. Do I value and respect other's property in the same way and treat it as such?

Some people demand respect from others for their words and opinions, yet, I often notice those are often the first people to show disrespect for others who hold opposite opinions.

I think it is really a matter of balance. Self-esteem/respect is a good thing. Esteem/respect for others is a good thing. The two must be balanced in equal measure to work out well for everyone. As soon as we start to sacrifice one to the other is when we begin to abuse ourselves or others.

Some people value their "rights" very highly. Yet, they don't feel that others in society should hold the same fundamental human rights as they do? Who made up that rule? Other people who believe the same, I suspect. The reason for this is they esteem their own self as of more worth than others.

When it comes to ideas and beliefs though, I don't value those as highly as I do people themselves. Some people think they "are" their beliefs. They are not. Beliefs can and do change. If I do not hold your opinion or belief on a matter in high regard, value it as of any worth, that does not mean that I don't respect you as a human being. It means that there is something in your belief that is in conflict with something I value more. For instance, I value equal human rights for everyone. So, if someone comes along from another country or religion and espouses the belief that a certain group of people should not have equal rights, well, then, I have no respect for that belief system, religious or political. I am not taking away their right to free speech but they may certainly advocating the taking away of mine, often by force.

So, it is all about balance. I respect myself and want benenficial things for myself. I respect others and want the same benefiical things for them. I speak to others without calling them derogatory names. I would like for them to speak to me in the same manner, whether they agree with my opinion or not. I don't hit others or force them to do things against their will. I expect the same in return. Balance, my needs and wants against your needs and wants. It's pretty much the simple stuff we learned in kindergaarten, but somehow we get away from it as adults don't we?

Respect and the values underlying it exist in a heirarchy for me (and probably for everyone else too, even if they don't realize it). You might even call it a respect-o-meter. At the top of the respect-o-meter is the preservation of the human species and our environment. I link them because the two are inextricably linked whether we acknowledge it or not. Any people, who show respect for other humans and the environment have more of my respect and esteem than ones who don't, I'll be honest. That doesn't mean I would intentionally harm or disrespect those that don't, but let's just say if Ghandi and Hitler were both drowning and I could only save one, I'm picking Ghandi! No apologies. Any political and religious ideologies that show respect for people and our environment and work toward their betterment, have my respect also. Unfortunately, so few of them do.

Cog

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