I think that a legalistic elder could very easily read a whole list of rules into these paragraphs. The first rule being that the only time an exception could possibly made in relation to the issue of attending church weddings would be when a non-believeing husband is wanting his JW wife to attend:
"So you attended your workmate's wedding at the Catholic Church brother Smith?"
"Yes, based on my own research I felt that this was a conscience matter".
"Well, that's interesting. It's my understanding based on the publications from the Slave that the only situation in which a True Christian could, in good conscience, attend a church wedding is when a Sister attends with her unbelieving husband".
Q11) Describe how one Christian wife might reason on whether to attend a church wedding, leading to what conclusion?
11) Lois reflects on the serious Bible command, `Get out of Babylon the Great,' the world empire of false religion. (Revelation 18:2, 4) She once belonged to the church where the wedding is to take place and knows that during the ceremony all present will be asked to share in religious acts, such as prayer, singing, or religious gestures. She is determined to have no part in that and does not want even to be there and be under pressure to break her integrity. Lois respects her husband and wants to cooperate with him, her Scriptural head; yet, she does not want to compromise her Scriptural principles. (Acts 5:29) Hence, she tactfully explains to her mate that even if he chooses to be there, she personally cannot. She may mention that if she attended and refused to share in some act, it might cause him embarrassment, so in that sense her not attending might be best for him. Her decision leaves her with a clear conscience.
Second rule: If the publisher attended a wedding at a church that they formally belonged to before converting to JWism, then they exercised poor judgment and are Spiritually Weak™.
"So sister so-and-so, you went to the wedding at a Presbyterian church? Isn't that the church you attended before you became a Witness?"
Q12) How might someone reason on and react to an invitation to a wedding in a church?
12) Ruth faces virtually the same dilemma. She respects her husband, is resolved to be loyal to God, and is responsive to her Bible-trained conscience. After thinking about points such as the ones Lois considered, Ruth prayerfully consults "Questions From Readers" in The Watchtower of May 15, 2002. She remembers that the three Hebrews complied with a command to be where idolatry would occur, yet they kept their integrity by not sharing in an idolatrous act. (Daniel 3:15-18) She decides to accompany her husband but not to share in any religious deeds, and she is acting in harmony with her conscience. She tactfully but clearly explains to her husband what her conscience will permit her to do and what she cannot do. Ruth hopes that he will see the difference between true worship and false.-Acts 24:16.
Third rule: If they do attend, JW's are not to enjoy or admire the ceremony in any way shape or form and the only reason for them to be there is to be silent advertisement for JWism.
13) Does the fact that two Christians might reach different conclusions suggest that it makes no difference what a person does or that one of these two must have a weak conscience? No. In view of her past experience with the music and trappings of church ceremonies, Lois may sense that being present would be particularly dangerous for her. And her past interactions with her husband on religious issues may affect her conscience. So she is convinced that her decision is best for her.
Note the phrase "May sense" - We all know what is really being said here.
