Presents to children from JW grandmother? (page 2)

llbh

I'd send them a lovely card .

You are too lovely to play the game on their terms .

You could add are these presents for Christmas?

regards and best wishes David

Namaste

I would send the card too. This may be a way of them trying to reach out and make a small connection that can turn into something larger.

I would also include information about you and your husband too, what you are up to, how well things are going, etc. Don't let them just make it about the children, write back about your FAMILY and help them remember that.

primitivegenius

yeah been there and done that............ my mom send some junk for my son and a letter written and addressed to him............. for about the first 10 minutes i was torn and it almost got torn up and thrown in the garbage............ because naturally there was NOTHING in there for me...... soi read it and my wife moved the damn thing or i would post it here lol. i ignored the first one and got two more afterwards.

still no contact............ personally i would be a bit snide and write an innocent letter since this is your first time getting that from her........... tell her that the boys enjoyed the toys she sent.......... and then hit her with the....... i guess you forgot to enclose the letter you wrote to me............... but you can bring it when you come to visit ......... oh and ill have some nice pictures framed up for you.......... or some other such nonsense............. see what kind of response you get.

personally i wont be treated like s*** by mine anymore........ i went to visit family and they pretty much ignored me......... so i figure next time i go to visit family i wont even bother to stop by........ they will know via the family grapevine that im visiting.............. but they will have to actually get up off their asses and come see ME. i refuse to make a huge meal for them and then they refuse to eat it............. if i was an asshole on that level i would at least tell the person ahead of time that i wouldnt eat so they wouldnt roll out the red carpet and spend money on food that they really needed to spend on formula.................. but thats just me

changeling

Be the bigger person. Give your children the gifts and tell them they are from grandma. If they are old enough, they should write a thank you note, if not, you should.

You can include a note telling her how her shunning is hurting the family and how warped it is, or whatever you wish.

Be classy about it and you'll have no regrets nor anything "they" can get you on. In fact your behavior may well make your MIL to feel ashamed (though she may never admit it).

changeling

Abandoned

still no contact............ personally i would be a bit snide and write an innocent letter since this is your first time getting that from her........... tell her that the boys enjoyed the toys she sent.......... and then hit her with the....... i guess you forgot to enclose the letter you wrote to me............... but you can bring it when you come to visit ......... oh and ill have some nice pictures framed up for you.......... or some other such nonsense............. see what kind of response you get.

This seems reasonable.

If you just send her a card and try to win her over with love, she's going to see this as a victory and you are the one who is going to have validated her dysfunctional behavior. Write her back if you want, but don't pretend there's not elephant on the coffee table. Address the fact that you don't appreciate her shunning you and that if she wants a relationship with her grand-children, you and your husband are part of the package.

Abandoned

still no contact............ personally i would be a bit snide and write an innocent letter since this is your first time getting that from her........... tell her that the boys enjoyed the toys she sent.......... and then hit her with the....... i guess you forgot to enclose the letter you wrote to me............... but you can bring it when you come to visit ......... oh and ill have some nice pictures framed up for you.......... or some other such nonsense............. see what kind of response you get.

This seems reasonable.

If you just send her a card and try to win her over with love, she's going to see this as a victory and you are the one who is going to have validated her dysfunctional behavior. Write her back if you want, but don't pretend there's not elephant on the coffee table. Address the fact that you don't appreciate her shunning you and that if she wants a relationship with her grand-children, you and your husband are part of the package.

momzcrazy

I feel the same way about my mom. She is being stupid and cruel, only to me. I will not make the first move. I have been the adult in our relationship too long. Taking care of the house and younger kids while she slept away the day. I supported her when she left the borg and married a "worldly" man. I supported her when he treated her like sh*t and had her living in a travel trailer visiting hookers while she was at work. She sees her faded brother, speaks to her DF'd friend. They must be better than me and my sister. BUT I won't be the one in the middle between her and my kids. Until she says or does something to them. Then I will rise up and beat the crap out of her, figuratively speaking of course.

momz

Dagney

Hi ((((sweet pea)))) !

I would take a little time, a day or two, off of thinking about it. Then come back to it and see how you feel about what to do. You will do the right thing.

jwfacts

I would thank her and keep the lines of communication open.

Hassans book Freedom of Mind is a good read, as it encourages many small good acts and little bits of information works better than anything else. She probably is expecting that since you "left Jehovah" your life will self destruct and you will become horrible people. Show her that you are all still a happy family.

sweet pea

Thanks for all the great advice everyone.

I sent a thank you letter - the boys are too young to write one.

I decided to leave off referring to the elephant on the coffee table but will save that for another time.

Thanks again, I really did appreciate your comments.

Presents to children from JW grandmother?

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