What does it take to get reinstated???

The Last Nephilim

Hello again. I have laid low from posting here for a bit and was barely here at all to begin with, so most, if not all of you, may not remember me.

I thought I'd let you all in on what just occurred in my cong. My ex wife was df'd in 2003 for multiple counts of adultery spanning a 7 year stretch. She had previously been df'd as a teen for sexual immorality. Her parents, particularly her mother, have not gone along with the df'ing arrangement and have not carried on the "obligatory" shunning that is normally expected. They even had the nerve to go to the DC together, stay in the same room, and go out to eat together even though they knew that all the restaurants in town would be packed full of other Witnesses. Sure enough, the mother was shortly thereafter publicly reproved and that was that. Afterwards, they began to go to DCs for other districts so as to not be recognized by anyone. They cong. elders were aware of it, but looked the other way. Meanwhile the ex has repeatedly put in letters to be reinstated, but the elders held their ground, because nothing had really changed in her life. In fact, she was sexually active with her "worldly" boyfriend and thought the elders had no way of knowing about him. Then she moved and switched congregations. Our PO told me that "many df'd people use that strategy thinking it will get them reinstated quicker, but it NEVER works". In her case, it took little more than 5 months! The real kicker, though, is that 2 months ago there were 4 eyewitnesses (3 of which have been in the "truth" for over 3 decades, were/are all pioneers, and one a former elder) from 2 different congregations who saw my ex and her mother eating at a restaurant together. The local elders were informed, nothing was ever done about it, and now the ex is reinstated!

I wonder if part of the reason they were willing to look the other way and reinstate her is because my wife and I have missed all meetings for 3 weeks, didn't turn in any service time for Dec., and my two kids with the ex are in need of a "spiritual role model"?

Hey, does that mean my wife and I are officially "faders"??? :P

Abandoned

Edit: Here's what I thought your title was:

Why does it take so long to get reinstated???

So I answered: Because it's a cult. They want you to think that you need to get their approval to receive God's forgiveness. If there is such a thing as God's forgiveness, you can bet it comes from someone named God and not Watchtower.

I have no idea why I read that so wrong.....

wha happened?

Depends. I've seen people kept out for years despite near perfect meeting attendence. I recently heard of the daughter of the PO who came to meetings for a month after being out for close to 10 years get reinstated.

Depends on who u know, what family u belong to, and the amount of ass kissing one does.

OnTheWayOut

Hey, I am not clear if you are jealous of your ex and her mother or not.

Even an adulterer doesn't deserve the shunning from her own mother.
They might be afraid that further pursuit of her mother will cause them to
permanantly lose her mother.

What great crime is sitting down to eat with someone, anyway. So what.
It's not like eating with your own adult child is committing adultery or approving
of committing adultery.

You might have a valid reason for being mad at the woman, but you should
move on and forget about who gets to go to a JC because of her.

journey-on

Then she moved and switched congregations. Our PO told me that "many df'd people use that strategy thinking it will get them reinstated quicker, but it NEVER works". In her case, it took little more than 5 months! The real kicker, though, is that 2 months ago there were 4 eyewitnesses (3 of which have been in the "truth" for over 3 decades, were/are all pioneers, and one a former elder) from 2 different congregations who saw my ex and her mother eating at a restaurant together. The local elders were informed, nothing was ever done about it

Sounds like the gossip mongers have been working overtime. You're divorced from her. Why should they be telling you ANYTHING about her.

JWs LOVE TO GOSSIP!

Enjoy your fade meantime.

The Last Nephilim

OnTheWayOut, I was only relating the story to point out what I believe to be a double standard with the elders in my cong., which is further reason why my wife and I are sick of the org and want out. They don't practice what they preach and they certainly are not impartial or fair when it comes to dealing with judicial matters. Trust me, I am not jealous of a couple of hypocrites who use the org like a tool. You could say that I'm just as bad as they are since I'm still technically "in" the org because I haven't figured out how to tell my underage children yet. When I do break the news to them, rest assured I will NOT be going back- EVER!

The Last Nephilim

Why should they be telling you ANYTHING about her.

Because I'm also currently in a custody battle with her for the kids. In one aspect I am pleased with the fact that she is reinstated now, because previously she used her df'd status to emotionally blackmail my son into not telling the judge he wanted to live with me (which he does). It worked at the time, but now my son wants another shot at talking to the judge, so this time the ex can't use the "how can you kick me while I'm down?" sob story on him!

Sincerely,

Lady Liberty

What does it take to get reinstated???

The Last Nephilim

Abandoned

wha happened?

OnTheWayOut

journey-on

The Last Nephilim

The Last Nephilim

Nathan Natas

Nathan Natas

Lady Liberty

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