The name was so that my counterpart could find me if she ever made it out or started looking around. I used the name everywhere including myspace, just in case, so she would know I never forgot her, but just the opposite was true. She did finally look around and start asking questions, and has been lurking here for a while nosing around, and did realize when she saw the name what it meant. She is my best friend, always has been, always will be. 143, you...you know who you are.
The avatar was chosen at first because I always loved the realness of Johnny Cash. He put it all out there, who he really was, what he really had done, and what he had learned. Granted, we probably wouldn't see eye to eye on everything today...but those core principles are mine. The other thing is, if you tell the bad with the good, what can anyone ever hold over your head later? It is the one thing I can always say I have been honest about, who I really am.
The avatar also came to mean something else to me. The gesture is perfect, because I believe there are people in the organization that know exactly what they are doing...and I know about it, too. One day, if I am allowed to, I'll throw this f*cking picture in their faces as they realize their own arrogance and abuse of power created something they cannot defeat with more lies and editing of bound volumes. I really hope they see this one and so many more as they watch the power they thought they had so much control over slip through their fingers.
It's for those who have blood on their hands, and meant to speak for those who will never be able to again.
What a bunch of grandiose bullsh*t...but it is a nice dream for me sometimes. You know...when someone says "it's not about me" it always is...that's something I am coming to terms with.
WLG