It was devastating to me at first. I still beleived I was leaving the truth, I just felt incapable of following the rules and lifestyle. It wasn't till later when I began researching everything did I get happy about it.
Joy Or Sorrow When You First Found Out It Was False?
by serotonin_wraith 46 Replies latest jw friends
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Gayle
Bittersweet. With time, mostly sweet, with a belch of bitter occasionally.
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darkuncle29
Relief followed by anger then a great sense of loss.
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Thegoodgirl
Joy.
Excitement,
Ready for action!
got the hell out of there.
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DJPoetech
I felt Joy because of the freedom of thought. Sorrow because my family considered me lost or spiritually weak. I have never felt so spiritually in tune since first studying the bible.
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Irish Rose
First I was angry, very angry. I was so mad that I threw away everything that came from the Watchtower. After that, I felt a very heavy weight lift from my shoulders.
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Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit
I felt like I had done SO much for other people, gave up so much potential, to be completely wholesouled in giving and doing for others and so many JWs are takers, that it was all so that WTS could dupe more people into joining. . .so the GB and others could carry on the lifestyle of overpaid execs - travelling, health insurance, cars, limos, unlimited expense account - I was angry that they had pulled so many magic tricks on the believers, on me, and that I had never questioned, I always believed and furthered their excuses. I had condemned so many people for becoming jaded and cynical, critical of the elders and the society, that really pisses me off.
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Trevanian
For me there was never an actual "time when I first found out".
Rather, it was a creeping realization that happened over the years, a realization dulled by the routine, by the JW social life with many nice people, by the feel-good moments, and of course by that wonderful in-built "sanity protector" called cognitive dissonance.
It probably started when I was a child, when I couldn't buy into, let alone explain to anyone else, the fragile arguments about why we didn't celebrate birthdays, although other types of anniversaries were fine. Over the years the things I couldn't explain to myself, let alone to others, increased.
It was lots of little things really. An increase in earthquakes being a sign of the end? Why didn't anyone else see that we were merely living in a time with an unprecedented level of monitoring, reporting, and communication of seismic activity?
Reporting of field service hours? Simply not a Christian concept, and I don't recall them even trying to justify that one with a scripture. That just didn't fit with the spirit of Christianity at all.
And so it built, all the little things I couldn't believe, until I simply knew that I didn't agree with the religion I was practising.
Perhaps the biggest "moment" for me was realizing that my having been dunked in water at a convention was not a legal contract with anyone, and that Elders Tom, Dick and Harry had no right to tell me what to do.
The feeling then was one of empowerment, plus the slightly daunting challenge of responsibility for making my own decisions going forward.
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Vinny
Shocked at first. Sad as well. I really wanted it to be the truth.
Life in a bubble is easier in some ways. Everything was laid out. I knew what to expect and look forward to. I had many friends. I was liked and respected. I had much responsibility. I believed I had found the truth. I had plans to go into the circuit and hopefully even district work as our kids were getting older. I am not the guy that left because things were rotten. For me they were good.
But the facts are what they are. I had to be true to myself, so I disassociated after months of sincere examinations.
In time I began to see so many benefits and opportunities by leaving the org.
I have never been one to shy away from truth, whatever form it takes.
Life today is very good. You make new friends; ones without conditions attached.
You become stronger with a new paradigm altogether.
I have very few regrets being in the org. Good things came out of it too.
Is just a new chapter now. (Actually more like a new book).
With many more stories and opportunities than before!
