My first panic attack

by freedomfighter 29 Replies latest jw experiences

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  freedomfighter

  Guess where my first panic attack occurred? At the kindom hall of course. I was 14yrs old and thought i was being "possessed by a demon".

  Panic attacks became more common, and at the age of 18 i was diagnosed with "Panic Disorder with Depression". Giving a talk from the platform was a nightmare, witnessing was almost as difficult for me.

  Funny thing though - The doctor put me on Vallium, and i used to take it before meetings and before witnessing. Apparently, it is difficult to learn new things when you are under the "influence" of vallium. That probably explains why i never "grew spiritually"!

  Nah. I think it kept most of my mind safe from the constant hounding. In the end, i just sat at the meeting, thinking this is all Bullsh#t!

  One visiting elder had a public talk on "Dealing with Anxiety and Depression". After 5 min's it became obvious to me that he had no idea what he was talking about. It made me so angry - i looked at my wife and looked at him - then walked out.

  FF
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  steve2

  Freedom Fighter, I really appreciated your sharing experiences with panic attacks. They are much more common than you may think. They are best treated, not with medication, especially not with benzodiazepines (the class of drug Valium belongs to), but with going back into the situation again and practising deeper breathing (rapid shallow breathing easily elicits the panic response).
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  ESTEE

  *Wishing I could have been drugged*

  It would have been preferable to being brainwashed.

  ESTEE
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  Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit

  Wow. No sh*t. You weren't feeling like the meetings were a protection I see. . .

  My first one was at bookstudy in the family home of friends of ours, I was 10 or so. I didn't know what it was and never told anyone, ever, until I was 36 and told my doctor. As a child I remember suffocating, they would last so long, I'd actually checked my temp once and had a fever of 102 or so, I associated the feeling with sickness, I thought I was sick. They were so constant, I'd lay in bed sometimes with continuous panic/anxiety over nothing, just frozen with plain old stifling dread and tears, later they came along with armageddon and persecution/torture thoughts. That was a real treat. I never told a soul, but I did pray, Yoohoovah, make it stop make it stop! Useless He remained and answered me not.
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  yumbby

  The doctors forget to tell you how addictive these types of drugs are. I just went through a horrible withdrawl from drugs for anxiety. Never again. There's got to be a better way to deal with it.
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  Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit

  I took 5-10 mil of Lexapro for 15 months, might go on it again, I had no problems going on or off. It made a great difference, when I really didn't need it I stopped.
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  Superslave

  FF I feel for you. Ive been having panic attacks since I was 18 yrs old. I tried meds but it wasn't the answer. Then I read loads of books on CBT (conigtive behavour therapy)

  When ever I feel one coming on I quickly ask myself...Am I hungry, Am I thirsty, Is my breathing too shallow, Am I in an enviroment were I feel uncomfortable??

  CBT gets you to take control of the feelings of panic & deal with them in a more productive way. It takes a little time to master it (took me a whole year) But Im glad I made the effort.

  Now I hardly have panic attacks unless Im extremely over tierd. (And I also don't attend those nasty meetings that lower my self esteem to ground level!!)
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  tooktheredpill

  Guess where my first panic attack occurred? At the kindom hall of course. I was 14yrs old and thought i was being "possessed by a demon".

  Freedomfighter:

  I can relate to your feelings. I started having constant panic attacks since I was 10 years old. At that time, there was no knowledge of the condition, so the Endocrinologist thought that I had an "chemical imbalance caused by high sugar levels", or something like that...

  I repressed all my feelings about it for years, because nobody seemed to understand what was happening with me. I thought that people were going to think that I was crazy, or "not spiritual enough". I felt that I was "disconnected" for moments, sweating, short of breath, and with a sensation that everything was irreal. It was horrible.

  I was correctly diagnosed at 26 years old, when I decided to visit a Phychiatrist. "General Anxiety Disorder, with Panic Attacks" and "adaptative disorder". I've been in medication since, and now I'm 35... And feeling kind of "normal" after so many years.

  The funny thing is that I don't have any family member with a similar condition!!!

  TTRP
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  Exterminator

  Panic disorders often respond well to a treatment with tricyclic antidepressants (amitryptiline...). These drugs may seem old-fashioned today, as more recent antidepressants are better tolerated, but they don't act the same way -panic is not the same as a depression. Tricyclics should be taken daily for months. They may help the patient deal with panic attacks as they arise, which is the conducive to remission.

  Benzodiazepines may have their use to calm down an attack, but don't help overcome the disorder. I don't see the benefit of taking them on a daily basis.

  (I'm a pharmacology prof)
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  ex-nj-jw

  Benzodiazepines may have their use to calm down an attack, but don't help overcome the disorder. I don't see the benefit of taking them on a daily basis.

  I agree, for acute panic attack Benzo's are great but should not be taken daily and most MD's will not prescribe this without some type of long term therapy. Definately therapy because it helps you deal with the deep issues causing the panic attacks.

  Benzo's can cause terrible withdrawal symptoms and even seizures if stopped suddenly after taking for long periods of time/daily. If anyone plans on discontinueing this type of med please do it under the MD's orders. Usually you have to tapper off and then you can use when needed without fear of the aweful side affects.

  There are a lot of people who don't believe in medication. If you need it use it and don't worry about what other people think. If you had diabetes you'd take medication to control that, if you had heart disease you take medication to control that, well mental conditions are no different. It is a health condition and if you need to take something for it, by all means do so.

  nj