WHY did the Chicken cross the road?

Mastodon

Why did the chicken cross the road? DR. PHIL :
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems. OPRAH :
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. GEORGE W. BUSH :
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. COLIN POWELL :
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.... ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. JOHN KERRY :
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. NANCY GRACE :
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. PAT BUCHANAN :
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American. MARTHA STEWART :
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS :
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. ERNEST HEMINGWAY :
To die in the rain. Alone. JERRY FALWELL :
Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth?' That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA :
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS :
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road. JOHN LENNON :
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. ARISTOTLE :
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. BILL GATES :
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your check book. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ......... reboot. ALBERT EINSTEIN :
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? BILL CLINTON :
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE :
I invented the chicken! COLONEL SANDERS :
Did I miss one? DICK CHENEY :
Where's my gun? AL SHARPTON :
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

Mastodon

Sorry you can't see the photos, but thay're not that important

Sparkplug

JOHN LENNON :
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

I love IT!!

nvrgnbk

WATCHTOWER :
The chicken crossing the road clearly reminds us of the need to trust implicitly in Jehovah's visible organization and support it by means of our valuable things, all the while leaving behind this wicked system of things along with its depraved practices.

frozen one

Speaking of chickens...and eggs:

Billzfan23

The chicken crossed the road to lay an egg, thus begging the question : Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Independent research indicates that Satan was the one who invented that question in order to further his evolutionary theories and confuse honest hearted ones.

myelaine

CHICKEN: run away from the ding-bats!...

OnTheWayOut

These are great. Nvr's additional thought is great, too.

The Bible says the chicken crossed the road, but when we examine the ancient definition of the
Greek word for "crossed" we see that it simply means he "opposed" the road.

This shows that the chicken was an evil slave against the preaching work, thus demonstrating
that we need to be careful at our get-togethers where someone brings a bucket of fried chicken
from KFC or Popeye's. We should be cooking our own chicken, ensuring that we use chicken that
is not making the fast food industry rich, and save our money for the Watchtower organization.

New light just in- This chicken crossing the road was only mentioned once in the Bible, thus it is
symbolic, not literal. It symbolizes the time of the end when many people are dissatisfied with their
churches and "cross" over to the one true religion- that of Jehovah's Witnesses.

hillbilly

Classic!

~Hill

Mrs. Witness

Love it! And here's one I heard the other day: Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

WHY did the Chicken cross the road?

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