You all have helped so much with the Mom Issue...So here is issue #2

by KICKED OUT 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • KICKED OUT
    KICKED OUT

    I have really felt a weight off my shoulders since bringing up my first story yesterday, so I would like to tell another story of my life, if for no other reason than to finally talk about it. Once again sugesstions on how to deal with this trauma is much needed. I was Dfd at 13 for the first time. It was a crazy experiance because it involved 4 kingdom halls and 10 teenagers. I was concidered the ring leader because out off the all the kids I was the only one baptized. My step father and mother were so upset with me that they did not let me stay home alone after the DFing. It was the summer time so I was out of school and both parents worked, so they had the bright idea of me going to work with my step father, and for 2 months for about 8-10 hours a day had to stay in the family mini van so i couldnt get in trouble anymore. At the time as a brainwashed 13 yr old, that wanted to do anything to get back in favor with family and friends, I didnt think it was a big deal but looking back with a clear head I cant believe they did that to me. Has anyone ever had anything like this happen to them???

    PS..I would like to apoligize in advance for my spelling...That is because the complete lack of respect for education drilled into me as a youngster.LOL

  • carla
    carla

    I've heard of parents who keep their kids in the car while they work. Usually in the news for child abuse. The cases I remember the parents got jail time.

    Honestly! I seriously cannot believe jw parents and what many of you have gone through!damn cult.

  • momzcrazy
    momzcrazy

    Besides the beating we regularly received, I was locked in the basement many times for lying. And got in trouble once for showing my welts to a friend at the KH.

    momz

  • loosie
    loosie
    2 months for about 8-10 hours a day had to stay in the family mini van so i couldnt get in trouble anymore.

    I think this is against the law especially in teh summertime.

    If I may ask what was this horrible sin you commited at 13 years old. I have a 12 year old and I can't think of anything so horrible that she could do that would warrant staying in the van for most of the summer.

    They probably baptized you too young. and you were just being a normal 13 year old. What did you parents do when they were 13???

  • KICKED OUT
    KICKED OUT

    In my profile I admitt it was to young...but I just wanted to be a good dub. I smoked butts, low level sex stuff, vandalism, pornos, drinking...you know normal teenage experimenting

  • bluesbreaker59
    bluesbreaker59

    No, nothing like that happened to me, I hid it. Usually I was the ring leader of it all, but one of the dumber ones would get blamed for it, and my name was never even whispered. I was in the middle of ALL the action by the time I was 16, I stayed away from drugs (as a personal decision), but all of my friends were doing some "serious wrongs". We had a few shop lifters, drug addicts, whores, man-whores, alcoholics, "rage" freaks, figthers, etc. My friends were a rough crew, we would beat the shit out of ya, if you told on us, I kept things for years for people, I never squealed. When I was 18 it ALL came to a head. People in the "other" group were getting busted left and right, some of them had sex with some of us, some in my group smoked with some of them, etc. So one by one, my friends started all taking falls. I got busted for messing around with my GF, swearing, and fighting. They tried to bust me for drinking but I never drank at those parties, I only drank with my closest friends. Most of these ones that got "busted" by the elders, are still out of da Troof, I never see any of them anymore. There is one that is still a Dub, and he was one of the biggest drinkers i ever saw, constantly drinking Jack Daniels. He is now an elder and pioneer.

  • oompa
    oompa

    Dang that is soo sad...the Van thing sounds like prison......are you sure you and blusbreaker59 are not childhood friends of mine? Are you both from NC?............may god bless...but he isnt around........................oompa

  • dawg
    dawg

    I loaned my best worldy friend my car for the prom...he had a piece of shit and I had a Firebird, which in the 80s was cool... He gave me his piece of shit, and he took my car, so I had to wait until he came home... he was supposed to get home at my curfew, but he arrived at 5AM... I sat in his car waiting becasue I knew my Dad would be pissed at me for loaning my car to a "worldy" person, we lived only 2 miles away, so I just waited until he showed up and drove home.

    Sneaking up the stairs, my Dad cought me... was mad that I was druink, even though he and I drank all the time together, and threw me out of the house that instant... this was the second time my Dad threw me out, the first was when I was 14... I sassed my mom and he threw me out of the house... the first time, I stayed out 3 weeks, lived in a camper my Dad owned... he just wanted to teach me a lesson... second time I lived with that same worldy friend until I found an shithole apartment...Lived there a few months and moved back in for about 3 months.

    After that, never looked back... It really wasn't that bad, I needed to leave.... I was having serious doubts and really wanted t get away, but when i fnally bought my first home at 25, I became disfellowshipped... they didn't talk to me for about 2 years... then I just faded for 18 years until last year when i came out as a full time apostate.

    So, at 14 I was thrown out of the house...at 18, thrown out of the house... couldn't have been restricted, couldn't have been punished any other way... I needed to be thrown out...and now at 45, I'm thrown out again... this time they can fuck off... sorry for the French, but I'm tired of their bullshit... someone needs their minds examened to throw a 14 year lod boy out in the cold winter... no where to go... aunts took me in but still, WTF?

    So, no car expierence, but I was damn well thrown out with all the rest of the trash... that's how they must have seen me.

  • Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit
    Pioneer Spit...oh, i mean Spirit

    What a safe arrangement that was. (sarcasm) I understand wanting to 'supervise' your child, but gee. You don't mention, but I wonder if your parents provided any recreation--even the WT says that should be important in a family--or was your whole life a punishment from the DF'g on? DF'd or not, you were just a kid. JW parents get so worried about how the family looks to others, they forget their primary job=love, teach, parent, plan, prepare.

    Onward dear! Life gets better for you and yours now, you can do so much more for yourself and your own kids and still teach them right from wrong.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Wow. I am beginning to understand that you have been a long-term victim of psychological and emotional abuse. Have you ever thought about doing some personal reading on the subject, or about talking to a psychologist.

    Just for clarification: psychologists employ talking only and cannot prescribe drugs. Psychiatrists can do both. I don't think that at this point you would benefit from any medication, but it may be helpful for you to learn how screwed up your parents were. You can break that cycle and be a much better parent to your kids.

    I have to wonder how your kids would in any way benefit from being close to their crazy shunning grandma.

    I was baptized at 14 more than 40 years ago. I was much more repressed and compliant than you were. Good for you!

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