Missed the CO

watson

Ouch, this is a first. I forgot we had the CO this week. Missed the Tues and Thurs meetings!!! I hate that because there is always a lot of "action" when he comes to visit. What all do you think I missed?

Watson

Connaughty

Man of all the times to miss, you sure missed a lot. Well here we go.

It was really the year 2075, not 1975. Caused by a missprint. Thanks to the advancement of computers. Sisters can't direct parking at the District Assemblies, but, they can wink at you if your car is cool. There is a new understanding about Oral Sex. It means more than just talking about it. Higher Education was cool, then it wasn't, then it was but you had to pioneer, then the society got hoodwinked again by those over educated weasels who didn't pioneer. So now you can't do it, because of those lying weasels. No one can be trusted in this anymore.

More to come at the District Assembly, that was just this last Thurday, and Friday. What? Don't tell me your missed that?

watson

I could never miss the Circuit Assembly. To much good stuff. It was the Circuit Overseer I missed. Blast it anyway.

Tired of the Hypocrisy

All the COs I ever knew were dumbasses with pushy attitudes and crap in their ears. I am sure you missed nothing more than the entertainment you get from watching a bunch of ass kissers jockying for position behind Ol' shithead for a chance to smooch his ass and perhaps sniff some Spirit Guided Flatulence!

MissingLink

t.o.t.h. - Why don't you tell us how you really feel?

What you missed depends on your congregation's statistics. If you had good numbers, then you missed a pat on the back and a "keep up the good work". If the numbers were bad, then you missed a "we gotta do better" talk. Either way - the end is closer than ever.

WTWizard

I haven't seen the hounder-hounder in more than 4 years, and I intend to keep it that way. That way, it will make extra work for them to find out how to get me back in the fold. It will also make extra work for them to get me into the Value Destroyer Training School and force me to build up the congregation to more than a billion people. Ouch.

JimmyPage

Since you missed the CO I will help fill you in by telling you about the last visit I saw. If you were the PO he was friendly. To everyone else he was pompous and arrogant. He gave a talk about the destruction of Jerusalem and the many horrific details that befell those who didn't separate themselves. How their bellies were cut open to remove the money they hid by swallowing it. You know, really encouraging and upbuilding stuff. I thought that since there were a lot of pioneers he would be really happy with the congregation. But instead he said there was a group growing faster than the pioneers- those who just didn't seem to give a flying rat's patoot. On Sunday he told us it was wrong to recommend a movie to someone else. Then he started giving an illustration based on the film version of "West Side Story". He mentioned how that when he leaves a circuit people start crying but blame this on their allergies acting up. Fortunately I had taken my Claritin and this did not befall me. Then he closed by saying "Beware the false prophet!" I have really tried to take this to heart lately the more I learn about Watchtower history. Hope this helps make up for the visit you missed!

OnTheWayOut

His Tuesday and Thursday talks are repeated every week wherever he goes.
The only action worth seeing is the elders all arriving early AS IF they always do,
people fawning all over him and his wife AS IF they are royalty, potential elders
and potential MS's giving polished talks.

You should have caught up on Sunday with his summary of what's wrong or
right with the congregation.

chickpea

t.o.t.h. - Why don't you tell us how you really feel?

exactly my thought!!

Meeting Junkie No More

Don't sweat it. You didn't miss anything of substance.

I could always count on our CO mouthing off about retirement planning being false reasoning. Or chastising the brothers for working shifts...real upbuilding stuff. After a while, it just felt better skipping the whole degradation talk altogether.

Congratulate yourself on at least spending the time you could have been there in a more worthwhile pursuit. Anything but that...

Missed the CO

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