I grew up in a (non-JW) home where my parents did not always get on the best.
However, my first introduction to domestic violence was at 17 years of age, when I left home and came into
"The Truth."
In the JW family that I lived with that first year, the husband and wife had frequent differences of opinion.
One of the elders told me that the husband concerned needed to, to quote; "clobber her", in order to establish his "headship."
If that isn't condoning wife beating, then it is a bloody good imitation of it!
Jack.
Wife Abuse
by ZeroZen 18 Replies latest social relationships
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Reefton Jack
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ZeroZen
Im sorry if the question offended anyone.
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R.Crusoe
A healthy level of abuse from the wife is very sexy except I aint got a wife!
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steve2
No. The Watchtower literature very clearly condemns spousal abuse. I'm sorry, but you may have to find something else they're allowed to do to muck-rake about.
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mrsjones5
Hit me and I'll make you a pot of grits
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Forscher
As has been noted, it is officially condemned by the organization.
But in practice it is often condoned by local BOE's. I remember a dearly loved sister who went to the elders to get some help getting away from a very abusive husband. The elders said they couldn't get involved. She ended up dead.
My wife was abused by her first husband. And the abuse continued after he divorced her. He would show up at her house, kick in the door, and beat her up, even putting her in the hospital right before a memorial celebration. The attitude of her elders was that she brought it all on herself because she wasn't as good a wife as she should be.
After I came into the picture, a mutual acquaintance who'd seen me humiliate a knife wielding thug empty-handed one night years earlier, went to the man and told him that I was the last person on earth he needed to piss-off. He told him that I was in a whole different class as a fighter than my wife's ex had ever encountered before and that, for all his vaunted prowess as a bar fighter, he wouldn't even give me a serious warm-up. That ended the abuse.
And he was right, since I'd fallen in love with the lady, I would not let my status as a Witness stop me from catching him one night and rather forcefully driving the lesson home that she was now off-limits.
Under the right circumstances I can be just as mean and ruthless as the man portrayed in my avatar.
Forscher
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cyber-sista
Wives be in subjection to your husbands. I knew plenty of JW husbands who were overly controlling (mentally abusive to their wives). There were also some who were wife beaters who seemed to maintain their fine JW postitions in the congregation. One sister I knew claimed her JW husband hit her and she went to the elders. One of them asked her what she did to make her husband beat her. She was very outspoken about her situation and was always told she had a problem with "headship."
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Dorktacular
Wives be in subjection to your husbands.
Boy, do too many people interpret THAT statment the wrong way! First of all, being in subjection to someone doesn't mean that they must beat the shit out of you. At work, I'm in subjection to my boss, but if he hit me, I'd kick his ass into next week! For someone to truly be in subjection to you, they first have to respect you. Without respect, there is no headship. If you aren't a person worthy of respect, nobody would ever subject themselves to you, nor should they. A man who beats or otherwise abuses his wife isn't worthy of respect and should not hold a position of headship at home, and definitely in the congregation.Now, let's look at the other side of the coin: if you are a Jehovah's Witness, you probably have a good understanding of what is to be expected in the marriage relationship as taught by the WBTS. The husband is to be the head of the family and the wife it to be in subjection to the husband. This relationship may work for some, if not most, of married couples. But, if you are the type of man who can't get his shit together and be effective in the role as described, why on earth would you ever consider getting married? Likewise, if you are a woman who just can't see herself in the role of wife as defined by the "Organization", why in the hell would you ever consider getting married? I think too many JWs make that mistake. They think that just because they happen to set foot in a Kingdom Hall several times a week that means that they have mastered the fine art of marriage by osmosis. It just doesn't work that way. There are many different types of personalities out there, and one size doesn't fit all. Most JWs are in such a hurry to get married to the first person they can get their hands on because there just aren't that many choices to pick from in the JW world. As a result, women get married to men who think that their special position as husband means that they can treat their wives like punching bags. Also, many JW men get married to women who absolutely run roughshod all over their husbands because they know they can, because divorce isn't an option for JWs who desire to remain in good standing with the congregation.
The best advice is to first examine yourself and find out what type of person YOU are and then based on that knowledge find out what type of person you're compatible with and what type of relationship you'd like to be in. Usually, if somebody is in a big hurry to get married, there's usually a good reason why. Usually, that reason is that they want to sink their hooks into you before enough time goes by for you to discover what a nutjob they are. By the time you discover what a nutjob they are, it's too late because you're already married.
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Layla33
Hit me and I'll make you a pot of grits
Hahaha, I was just watching that the other day.
Hit me, and they will be looking for the body.