Hi guys, I'm new here.

spanteach

I'm a former JW or JoHo as one of my sister's schoolmates used to call us. (Reminds me of the HoJos we used to stay at for assemblies :D) I was raised as a Witness, baptized at the age of 14 due to my father's constant pressuring. I'm in my mid-30s now and I stopped attending meetings three years ago. Oh AND I have a college education and was a foreign exchange student which I was obtaining while going to meetings. I'm sure you can imagine the joy of a lot of the elders that a single sister was going to college instead of pioneering. Well, sorry, I frankly don't want to clean houses for $10 an hour for the rest of my life just to make YOU happy. I lurked for about a day or two on this board just to see what the general atmosphere was. Let me just say that for me personally I don't have any problem with any of the things we were taught in the congregation and I still believe in Jehovah and his guidance. There are still some things that I miss about it, like volunteering at assemblies and getting to know people from other congregations. I'm just not going to be told what to do by a bunch of self-righteous hypocrites who are in the forefront of the congregation and who decide for themselves that because I'm not breaking my neck to get in 70 hours a month AND support myself financially I'll be destroyed at Armageddon. Whew, okay, that's all. Any questions, class? LOL

Priest73

what is this Armageddon you speak of?

Priest73

Oh yeah. Welcome aboard.

nomoreguilt

spanteach.....WELCOME TO JWD !!!!!!

From what you have posted and observed yourself the last day or 2 on the board, you already know who and what we are..We are a varied bunch here. Take your time to get to know us, as many of us think a little differantly about the wts and the god of the Hebrews. I am an ex-jw, in good standing, I just don't buy it or believe it anymore. We call ourselves FADERS, as we have slipped silently away while others still attend the meetings.

Stick around, you are about to get a new education....

NMG

cognac

Hey Span!!!

Nice to meet you! Glad to hear a bit about you. I came here a couple of months ago trying to figure things out and get support. It's a great place to be.

Welcome, we look forward to getting to know you more!

spanteach

The thing is, I had stopped attending meetings in my mid-20s, but I knew I'd go back. I knew what would happen if I stayed away. I'd have to give up all the friendships I'd had since childhood. I wasn't ready for it. But after the last congregation I was in, I'd had enough. It was a small congregation with A LOT of pioneers who were constantly trying to pressure me to become a ~~clone~~ pioneer like them.

Then people would look at me like I'd grown another head when I said I had no interest in getting married. What I didn't tell them is that I didn't feel like becoming the little wifey who keeps her mouth shut and follows and/or supports whatever her husband says no matter how foolish it might be. Those who were okay with me staying single looked at me like I just said "there is no God" when I said I had no interest in becoming a pioneer again. You can't win and I was tired of trying to.

I didn't talk about my feelings to ANYONE the first year. I just disappeared. Then finally my mom and I had a heart-to-heart about what had been going on. She was just like "why didn't you tell me?" I felt like she would have defended them and I didn't want to hear it.

Sorry I keep posting so much, but this is very therapeutic for me.

cognac

I felt like she would have defended them and I didn't want to hear it.

Good Lord, I hear you!!! It's completely exhausting going back and forth when they start defending things....

Sorry I keep posting so much, but this is very therapeutic for me.

Don't be sorry at all!!! Post as much as you would like, say whatever you like!!! We are here to listen to eachother and support eachother!!!

Looking forward to hearing more from you!!!

spanteach

when I finally told her, though, she didn't defend them. She just said "I'm sorry." Thank you mommy. Yes that's right, I'm in my mid-30s, but when my mother has done something nice, I call her "mommy" like I'm five years old. LOL.

My dad (former elder of 20 years) was the one I didn't want to deal with. He's the type of person that it doesn't matter how you feel, going to meetings and going in service (which he never did) is something you MUST do, end of discussion.

Confession

Hi, Spanteach... In a way I envy you.

You had the guts to admit to yourself you just didn't like the lifestyle your were being pressured to lead, and that you weren't going to fall in line with it. In my case, I didn't let myself admit that. It was too difficult to come to that conclusion since I believed it was The Truth. It wasn't until some things happened while I was serving as an elder that made me think...

"Something isn't right here."

It's not that I didn't like some of the things other elders were doing, nor that I had little disagreements with the Society. It was an understanding that something was hugely, fundamentally jacked up. I've written long pieces about it in the past, but the short version is this: I came to see that the WTS' position on confession was quite essentially the same as the Catholics position; a position the Society itself used to condemn. I came to see that there is no Biblical basis for believing that, if we didn't confess to congregation elders, Jehovah wouldn't forgive us. Then, when I saw evidence that the Society knew this wasn't Biblical--and that they still used "lack of confession" or even "lack of a speedy confession" as a reason to cut off people from their families and entire community of friends...well that was something, try as I might, I just couldn't keep dismissing. It was the little crack that allowed a bit of light in. Eventually I was able to use my own mind, and in so doing, realized that the WTS was definitely NOT what it purported to be.

Apparently in your case it has not been a realization that the organization isn't the sole channel of communication from God, but more that you just didn't want the life they were pushing on you. But still, you too realized...

"Something isn't right here."

And you're correct. Something isn't right. The fact is there is no Biblical basis for a person or group of persons to wield such authority over others. You remember the scripture about 'knowing the truth, and the truth setting you free'? Remember how the JWs would spin that? They knew that any fool could see genuine "freedom" did not exist in the congregations of Jehovah's Witnesses, so they'd say things like, "Why Jesus was talking about freedom from pagan doctrines," or some such rubbish. It's a story that replays itself over and over again: some people want what's best for others. They get to thinking "they and only they" know what's best. A religion comes forth. In the beginning it's all usually innocent, but when people don't fall in line quickly, their policies become more and more strict--until they are no longer innocent. Societal pressure is utilized very well.

Among JWs, you're pressured to believe it's the Truth. Are you really given an alternative? What would happen if you didn't choose to believe this? The ramifications are strong enough to keep you "believing." Then you're pressured constantly to do more, more, more for the organzation's interests. And your "spirituality" has nothing to do with your feelings about Jehovah or Jesus Christ, does it? You could express with all of your might how much you love them, and how much you try to follow in Jesus' footsteps. The standard they use to judge your spirituality has NOTHING to do with your disposition with Jehovah or Jesus--but of your disposition with the rules of the Watchtower organization. Forget that Jesus saved his greatest denunciation for the strict religious leaders of his day. That was then and this is now. And now Jehovah isn't looking for people to have a personal relationship with Him. He's just looking for weak-willed people to follow all the rules and accept all the perspectives of a religious publishing company.

So what I'm suggesting, dear, is that for you this is the crack that lets some light in. If you look a bit further, you'll come to see that they weren't what they said they were--and what you and I always thought they were. And that, I believe, will vanquish whatever guilty feelings that may still linger about leaving this legalistic and authoritarian organization.

Love,

Confession

cognac

Thank you mommy. Yes that's right, I'm in my mid-30s, but when my mother has done something nice, I call her "mommy" like I'm five years old. LOL.

awwww, that's so cute!!!

He's the type of person that it doesn't matter how you feel, going to meetings and going in service (which he never did) is something you MUST do, end of discussion.

yup, my dad too... Except, he'd go out in service on Sundays and would do 1 call (always mine) on the way home... Or, once in awhile he'd go out on Saturday and we'd take an hour break, lol... Once in awhile, we'd do territory and he'd never let me talk, that really pissed me off, lol... Sometimes, he'd like to teach the other pioneers a lesson for walking to slow and would shoot the breeze with the householder for 1/2 to an hour talking about nothing, lol...

Hi guys, I'm new here.

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