I'm sitting at work reading this post and I've got tears in my eyes. I mean, come on, I'm 6 feet tall and 300 hundred pounds with tears in my eyes. You go Mr. Flipper.
I would like to announce my nominee for Father of the Year...Mr. Flipper.
Mr. Flipper's Conversation over Coffee w/ JW Daughter - Mixed Results
by flipper 28 Replies latest jw friends
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Meeting Junkie No More
Mr. Flipper:
First off, fantastic meeting with your daughter! Did she actually say "you raised me in the witnesses?" Because that's already a mental acknowledgement that it's not the truth, I'd say. Otherwise, she would have said, you raised me in the truth! I think she's already starting to climb out of the box. Interesting choice of words! Only after I had mentally climbed out did I begin to use phrases like 'raised in the witnesses.' It's a small step, but a BIG ONE! Congrats!
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nomoreguilt
My friend......Sorry I missed this yesterday. True, we did raise them that way, our ignorance of the TROOF, right? Now, it is our responsibilty to apprise them of our errors. You know my situatution as I do yours. We have a tuff row to hoe Flip, and you re making adavancement where I haven't as YET had the opportunity.
We do have brighter days ahead of us though, don't we.....Carry on my friend, stay UPBEAT!!!!
Don't let it get to you.......
NMG..........just being me.
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still_in74
my only comment is that I hope your daughter knows how lucky she is to have you....
Best of luck Flipper! My thoughts are with you both.
Still..............
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jwfacts
You are handling it very well, and keeping the subject off religion is the best way for now, with just the odd comment now and again.
In this post and your last I see that the issue is going to soon arise that Jehovah has only one "Organisation" and "If this is not the truth, where else would a person go?"
I had a similar talk with my sister. She kept saying that no one else worships God. I had to keep reminding her that most people I know worship God, they may call him by different names, but in general they recognise and love their creator. And with the Organisation question, I bring up that Job had a personal relationship with God, even though he was not part of any organisation, even though at the time Jehovah was dealing with the Israelites. In fact, the Israelites were Jehovah's Org simply to point to Jesus, but most of the time they were doing many evil things. I think you may need to prepare some sort of comment for when she raises such an issue.
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flipper
Thanks for all your replies ! I really appreciate your support in this challenging time ! And your advice!
SPANTEACH- Pretty cool, Spanteach daughter ! O. K . to call you daughter too ? LOL! Nice to know you. I really believe the example of your witness dad eventually reconnecting with your sisters has everything to do with him partially getting back his " authentic " or "real" personality he had before the cult - and losing some of his " cult " mentality . He is allowing himself to be a little bit real anyway 1 That's good ! But I commend you for setting the right example for him to follow - by continuing to speak to your sister through the years. I hope my daughter will keep talking to me as well !
SPAZNIK- I know what you are saying. I have to be careful here. BELIEVE ME - I know what NOT to say to prevent the elders from tampering with me . I will be cautious if they even decide to pay me a visit !
HOTSPUR- I'm glad your daughter still talks with you and visits you - that's great ! I think it will work out in the end with my daughter , I just have to take my time and be patient.
POTENTIAL JWCONVERTS WIFE- I'll keep plugging away like you said . I hope she realizes our relationship is important too ! She told me her relationship with her heavenly father came first - so we will see.
PRINCESS DAISY BOO- You can be my adopted daughter as well ! The more daughters the better ! LOL! It is ironic - you have parents in the cult you are trying to get out , while I have a daughter I'm trying to get out ! We all have our different situations for sure ! Both are challenging !
SOONER 7 C- Thanks for your kind words friend. Sorry, didn't mean to make you cry. I've done a little of that myself this last week. I'm going to keep trying with her though. Thanks bud.
MEETING JUNKIE NO MORE- I truly hope that some day she realizes she is not in the "truth ". That would be an awakening for her. She asked me recently, " Dad , do you believe in the truth ? " I said, " yes, I am the truth. The truth is in me. I'm a very truthful person ! " LOL! I don't think that's the answer she was looking for ! But it's the one she will continue to get from me.
NO MORE GUILT - Thanks for your kindness friend. We do have similar stories , don't we ? All we can do is like you say- Try to help our adult children see the real " truth " of life . I'm doing O.K. emotionally - not letting it get me down. I'm a pretty positive , upbeat person who always has hope !
STILL IN 74- Thanks my friend. I hope my daughter values me as much as I value her too !
JW FACTS- I will keep off the subject of religion as much as possible. I'm going to emphasize the father/daughter relationship. If she asks me if I believe it's Jehovah's organization - I'll just simply say , " It is a deeply personal feeling I have about my personal relationship with Jehovah ", and just sidestep the question as if she would be intruding on my conscience asking me -
flipper
Just wanted to bump this up for those of you who haven't seen this follow up story of trying to reconnect with my daughter after 9 months of no contact ! Anyway- all your thoughts, observations and advice is certainly welcome 1 Peace to you all. Mr. Flipper
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Wasanelder Once
Flip, even my brother who is DF'd for 19 years defends the Watchtower thinking. It shows how deep the mindset is embedded. To think that there is no worldwide brotherhood, no worldwide "Truth", no "mother" organization is absolutely mind shattering to him. Your daughter is going to be torn in two as she considers her love for you and her love for her world view. I don't know why making the break doesn't make some schizophrenic. Maybe that's what happens when they mentally make the break but can't emotionally face the reality of it, I don't know. I have to believe that the bond you have with your sweetie daughter, (no sarcasm intended) will hold through this if you remain cautious. Her husband? Can't say. Flip, it sounds as if you are on the right track. Best wishes on your torpedo missions. Shoot for the rudder and not for the control tower. Even better wishes on building and maintaining family bonds. W.Once
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flipper
WAS AN ELDER ONCE- Thanks for the reply. I can't believe your brother still defends the witness organization after being out DFed 19 years. Incredible. Some of these people have to keep believing the illusion, don't they ? But I will be cautious with my daughter just building up the father/daughter relationship from an emotional viewpoint - and stay off religious topics unless she brings it up or has questions for me. I will aim for the rudder of the ship as it is less recognizable . Just have to be patient