NEED IMMEDIATE HELP FROM anyone who has military knowledge

by Tatiana 29 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  OnTheWayOut

  My opinion is that they are sending a message to your son.
  Only he and they (and perhaps a few higher-ups nearby) know
  what the message is.

  In boot camp, they used to throw a blanket over a guy so he
  couldn't identify who was hitting him. They would do this to
  someone who was not getting with the program. If the guy
  didn't clean himself, they threw a shower party where they
  scrubbed him with toilet brushes in the shower from head to
  toe. To boldly do it when they could be identified means they
  sent a strong message, or they were too drunk to think about it.

  The answer to sending a message is not to get your mother involved.
  It is to answer the message yourself. He can be a man by handling
  it his own way.

  I don't agree with the method used here. It's just an opinion of what
  they may have done. If he were to use this as a way to get out of the
  military, so be it. If he gets stronger because of it, great. These men
  are going to put their lives on the line and need to count on others.
  They want to count on your son as much as he wants to count on them.
  Let him do what he thinks is best and stay out of it.
• 

  Tatiana

  First, is he in boot camp or has he graduated from boot camp?I was in the Navy in the 60's; so, I don't know what has changed. You will always have Asholes and you can't get away from them.

  In boot camp there is no alcohol. I didn't know you could drink openly on base.

  My son is out of boot camp. He is a mechanic. He did basic at Ft. Jackson in SC. As of now they are making him sign up for an alcohol program for underage drinking. He is only in trouble with his Sgt and company. The other guys, and there were at least 10 according to witnesses, are in serious trouble with the MP's and "law."

  I have a friend on another board who is actually stationed at Ft Hood. I have never met her in RL, but she is amazing. This woman actually went and found my son in his barracks, called me while she was hugging him and inviting him to her house for dinner, and assured me he was ok and his face was looking better. Never underestimate the power of the Internet! She's going to keep me updated with the investigation too.

  Sorry guys...but "mothers" rock!
• 

  Tatiana

  My opinion is that they are sending a message to your son.
  Only he and they (and perhaps a few higher-ups nearby) know
  what the message is.

  In boot camp, they used to throw a blanket over a guy so he
  couldn't identify who was hitting him. They would do this to
  someone who was not getting with the program. If the guy
  didn't clean himself, they threw a shower party where they
  scrubbed him with toilet brushes in the shower from head to
  toe. To boldly do it when they could be identified means they
  sent a strong message, or they were too drunk to think about it.

  The answer to sending a message is not to get your mother involved.
  It is to answer the message yourself. He can be a man by handling
  it his own way.

  I don't agree with the method used here. It's just an opinion of what
  they may have done. If he were to use this as a way to get out of the
  military, so be it. If he gets stronger because of it, great. These men
  are going to put their lives on the line and need to count on others.
  They want to count on your son as much as he wants to count on them.
  Let him do what he thinks is best and stay out of it.

  They were way drunk. They didn't even know my son. Ft Hood is huge, and he was all the way across the base away from his barracks visiting his friend from High School. He doesn't want to leave the Army. He did handle it his own way, filed a report, and all I ended up doing was asking to be kept informed.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  Now you see, I didn't want to say anything negative about your son because I don't know him.
  But here is what I got from your first post:

  Of course I know my son, and there's probably more to the story

  On a base, they would have to be awefully stupid and rednecked to go that far. If it were out
  in town, it might look more innocent on your son's part. On the base, I would have doubted
  it was a random black guy picked by drunken white guys. But I am sure that's the story
  you will get. He will say it and the military will say it. "Nothing else, Mom." "Nothing else,
  maam."

  Then threw a beer can at my son. My son, Gabriel, picked it up and threw it back, and all 10 of these idiots jumped at once. They were ALL WHITE!!! So, I'm wondering if it was racially motivated.

  I don't want to go there, but you realize he could have started it. He might have said it
  was that way, but it could have been a continuation of an earlier altercation. Maybe he
  "knew" one guy but not the other 9. Maybe he had people with him, but they ran away
  instead of backing him up. You will never get the full story.

  I am not offering suggestions to stir up flaming comments. I just suggest that the whole thing
  needs to be handled by him. I am glad he is handling it. He sounded bright and caring to
  try to minimize it after your recent hospitalization. I fully agree that it was outrageous for
  10 strangers to attack him and beat him because he threw an aluminum can back at them.

  I just need to know what I CAN do.

  NEED IMMEDIATE HELP FROM anyone who has military knowledge

  I was answering the call. That was all.
• 

  AGuest

  I am a pacifist, so I abhor any and all violence. Not because of being a former witness, but because it's wrong, IMO

  Me, too! Except... I honestly have to say that I think I could get violent, I guess, if something compelled me to. It would really have to be something heinous, though, and probably involving a child. Something like this might make me want, though...

  So, you can understand how hard it was for me to come to grips with his choice, but I did, and I will love him no matter what.

  Knowing that I would have gone through the same thing if it were my son who made that choice, but would love my son... no matter what... I do indeed totally understand.

  This kind of violence is just beyond me.

  I understand that, too. I think I was just coming from a place that said "involving mommy" can and most probably will make it worse, as well as life often "sucks", regardless of our choices, and sometimes because of our choices (trust me on this one - )... something our children need to know and understand as soon as possible.

  I am EXTREMELY happy... for your son and you... that the result appears to only be some pretty ugly scrapes and bruises. It could'a been worse (praise JAH, it wasn't!). Take care... and love your son as only you know how to.

  I bid you the greatest peace.

  Your servant and a slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  Tatiana

  You will never get the full story.

  I am not offering suggestions to stir up flaming comments. I just suggest that the whole thing
  needs to be handled by him. I am glad he is handling it. He sounded bright and caring to
  try to minimize it after your recent hospitalization. I fully agree that it was outrageous for
  10 strangers to attack him and beat him because he threw an aluminum can back at them

  .

  I know I will probably not get the whole story, but they are prosecuting the guys and not my son. Also, there were witnesses apparantly who signed statements. I'm out of it now, except to get updates on the ones who beat him up. I'm just sooooooo thankful he's ok. It's bad enough having to worry about him going to Iraq. But this was just crazy.

  Thank you for understanding, AGuest.

  One other thing...even though I know he's underage and is not supposed to be drinking, I just think it's crazy too that you can be old enough to shoot and kill someone legally, but not old enough to have a beer afterwards. Somehow that just doesn't compute.
• 

  SusanHere
• 

  SusanHere

  I'm so sorry to hear your son suffered this assault, whether he in some way contributed to it or not. As I was also in the military, I can tell you that I saw things there that I would never have believed can be allowed to happen in such a controlled environment. It was an eye opener, that's for sure, for this very naive girl of 18.

  What I did quickly learn was that a military base is like anyplace else on earth in that you have to watch your back at all times. You have to watch your own conduct and watch out for others whose misconduct might harm you or your career in some way. Your son undoubtedly learned that same lesson while still in basic training.

  The other thing I learned is that you never go anywhere alone, but rely on the buddy system. You need to trust your buddies to look out for you, as you look out for them. That goes double for going anywhere where alcohol is being consumed. Alcohol and the military have long been a bad combination.

  The base is not really a "controlled environment" at all once you are out of basic and AIT. It is more just a large community of people from all parts of the country, and often other countries as well. They all have different backgrounds, races, prejudices, religions including no religion at all, all levels of patriotism, education, maturity, and of self-control or the lack thereof.

  People have to learn to respect one another and learn to get along with all kinds of people. Not so different from the "real" world in a lot of ways, the main difference being that you can't quit when you want to, and you will obey orders, and you will go where they send you, including into into war.

  It's truly sad that at 18 your son has a serious alcohol problem. I hope he can conquer that.

  From one mama bear to another, good luck and God bless both you and your son.

  SusanHere
• 

  SusanHere

  In case I sounded anti-military, I'm not. My husband and I were both in. I have two sons in now. Both have served in the war zone. Both are in units that are going back.

  The military is what you make it. I wouldn't trade my military experience for anything. My only regret is that I was too young to make the most of it, but it sure helped me out in life many, many times over.

  SusanHere
• 

  Tatiana

  It's truly sad that at 18 your son has a serious alcohol problem. I hope he can conquer that.

  From speaking to his 1st Sgt, they are making him go because he's underage. That I still do not understand How can yo be old enough to kill someone but not old enough to drink a beer? Someone sent me this, and I was shocked. I guess if he was at Ft Bliss, he wouldn't be in trouble at all.

  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_drinking_age
  

  Underage purchase of alcohol, though illegal in all fifty states, is not a felony, but a misdemeanour. See Underage drinking in the United States. Additionally, exceptions exist on certain military installations, for instance Fort Bliss, Texas, where the Commanding General lowered the age to 18 to reduce the number of soldiers traveling out of the country to nearby Ciudad Juárez, Chihuahua, to drink. Congress is considering changing the law to 18

  SusanHere said:

  
  

  The other thing I learned is that you never go anywhere alone, but rely on the buddy system.

  I did give him your advice. From now on he'll have some buddies with him. Thank you.

  From one mama bear to another, good luck and God bless both you and your son.