by scotsman 15 Replies latest jw friends
Just reading some of the confirmations re the amalgamation of the group study with the TMS/SM I see those that have had conversations with their PO have been on the board since 2002 (eg yesidid and Alligator Wisdom)
6 years fading, how the hell are you coping???
I believe it's a case of mental constitution some people can live through pretending to be something they are not, after being forced to do so by the unreasonable behaviour of their religious leaders. At the end of the day someone that is inactive and offers nothing of value to the WTS has nothing to feel guilty about and can even damage them on the internet, incognito.
Fading doesn't necessarily mean that person goes to any meetings any more. I haven't been to a meeting for almost 7 years and consider myself a fader. I am considered "inactive" by my last congregation rather than da'd or df'd. I'm not counted in the numbers any more than da'd or df'd jws. They hang onto your cards forever, some even after you have died.
It is not always necessary to separate oneself formally from the WTS according to their rules to be away from their shenigans.
We do pretty much what we want, except raise a flag (not a one in this ten block area) or hang the Christmas lights outside (too dangerous).
Blondie
I am a bit confused by the term "fader". I don't see myself leaving any time soon but may execute a fade in about 30 years at the outside. Am I a fader?
I did a five year fade and it about killed me. I am sensitive to the issues of long term faders on this board, glad they have this place, I didn't.
wings
re your comments Blondie: You may have faded, but you have actually left. I'm referring to those that have been on the board long term and still attend meetings and I'm not being critical. I attended meetings for 6 months knowing full well I thought it all baloney, and I felt like my head would burst.
You may have faded, but you have actually left.
When I first got on this board, the term fader was really confusing. I would read posts of folks that said they were fading but hadn't set foot in a KH in years. After a few months I realized, that a fader can be someone that is still in the process or folks that have completed the process. I consider myself to be someone that has completed the process. However, I'm still working on the residual damage.
Honestly, I don't know how long-term faders do it. I think I would go crazy.
What I call a "fade" amounts to gradually doing less and less for the Washtowel Slaveholdery corporation. You go to fewer and fewer boasting sessions, drop "privileges", and do less and less field circus. While you are still going, you pretend to believe in it, but fake difficulty to justify diminished activity to prevent Brother Hounder from going after you.
At some point, you stop doing anything altogether. At this point, you are no longer "fading", but you have completed the fade. You are still a fader, since you have completed the fade. However, it is still possible for Brother Hounder to call you, and the hounders still look for things like Christmas decorations and flags. They might still rat you out and try disfellowshipping you for things that you could get disfellowshipped for if you were still active. And, the biggest problem is that they will try to reactivate you at this time. Nothing makes the witlesses rejoice so much as when they reactivate someone who has completed a fade.
That is why I recommend, once you complete a fade, to never ever show up for even one boasting session (and especially the REJECT Jesus Party). If you do, you could be their next reactivation story. If they come to your door, just act like a worldly person that is not interested. The object is to make reactivation impossible, and they cannot reactivate you if you act like a worldly person with no interest and keep slamming the door in their faces.
I faded 11 years ago. Best 11 years of my life, and only looking to get better. Satan must be really putting the blinders on me.
I guess it should be fading (an ongoing thing) and faded (did the fade and now you're done). Me I faded for about 7 months (quit FS and gradually stopped going to meetings. I have not been to a meeting for a year this month and June will mark two years from the last time I was in FS.
changeling :)
