by LovesDubs 16 Replies latest jw friends
that the GB said that the sheep "couldnt be trusted" to do anything voluntarily and therefore they couldnt stop the reporting arrangement because nobody would go.
SEE! Now, if the sons-a-bitches would have said this where I could have heard it, I would have gone more!!!
When I believed everything and had no issues....yes
Actually I liked it quite a bit both door and informal. To thisi day I can talk to anyone about anything! I also was at a KH that made it a party! After a neighborhood we would go out to some place fun and play for twice the amount of time we did 
. So 2 hours FS (including driving) = 4 Hours of Fun!
I still use this equation for all kinds of things.....
For the longest time, I went because I had to (parents made me) and then as I got older to keep up appearances... But then this one time I was in service with the regular pioneer in the hall... we were walking down a street and she said to me reflectively "I just hope I'm doing all I can. When I stand before Jehovah and he examines me, I hope that I have done EVERYTHING that I possibly could." Her saying that scared me sooooo much, I mean this was a woman who put in 90+ hours a month and she was worried about doing enough!! After that I was fearful and so I went in service more and more, I auxillary pioneered... then slowly I started to realize that I would live in fear forever because it would never be enough... I didn't think God would demand such fear and anxiety as a price for his grace.... actually, that's a contradiction in terms isn't it?
I would probably would have gone because I was made to go, or because it was the thing to do, but not because I really and truly wanted to go.
MMO
I quite enjoyed going and I got good at it. It wasn't the need to count time that got me out door knocking. I really thought I was doing God's will by field service. (Matt 24 v 14 and all that) The time only became important if I auxillary pioneered.
Soon as I figured out the Organization was a fraud I really struggled. What do you do when your main goal is to push a magazine or a book which you think has the truth, then discover that said mag or book doesn't have the truth after all. What do you do next? Where does the conversation go? I tried using just the bible but found I didn't really know what I was talking about. People were far more clued up on what the bible actually said than I was, and that was after 21 years of field service training!
Figured I wasn't working for God after all but a publishing company in NY.
No, and I'm pretty proud of all the JWs who fake their hours, stretch out the service using the pioneer walk, drive from not-at-home rvs all day from one end of the territory to the other, take big donut breaks, little shopping excursions, stop for petrol, start time early in the morning with the one call who you know is always out... I don't care that they have to do that to get through the ridiculous requirements. Every time they do it, it breaks down the wall a tiny little bit. It makes them care about it less and hate the preach more.
Report it or not, I would have still gone out, IF the benefits of doing so exceeded the cost. And how much? Until the marginal cost started exceeding the marginal benefit. If that was the case, they could trust most rational people, since not going out would have resulted in positive opportunity costs and deadweight.
However, if the benefits are zero, or exceed the cost right from the start, there is no way I would go out in field circus without its being a requirement. Every yoctosecond I spent out in field circus to appease Brother Hounder resulted in deadweight. Hence, waste.
