At the washingtonpost.com, one of the regular blogs is called "On Balance". Often the topic is the balance between work and home life. However, today the topic title was "Do Parents Have the Right to Force Religion on Their Kids?"
http://blog.washingtonpost.com/onbalance/?hpid=news-col-blog-viewall
My Southern Baptist father and WASP mom raised us kids with exposure to many religions -- I went to Catholic, Presbyterian and Jewish services with relatives and family friends -- but they invoked little religious influence. I'm technically Presbyterian and I married someone Jewish; our kids are "half and half," which so far has worked out fine in our non-denominational urban universe.
So I guess I am naturally baffled by parents who feel it is their right to "force" children to abide by their religious choices, such as an Oregon case earlier this year that attracted national attention when the Oregon Supreme Court blocked a divorced former Southern Oregon man from circumcising his 12-year-old son against the wishes of the boy's mother.
According to the Oregonian, the court ruled that the trial judge failed to determine whether the boy wanted to have the procedure -- a voice of reason here since it's obvious to me that a 12-year-old is old enough to weigh in on decisions affecting his body. The custodial parent, James Boldt, who converted to Judaism several years ago, argued that he, as the boy's father, has wide latitude to make decisions for his son. The child's mother, Lia Boldt, says that circumcision is dangerous and that her son is afraid to say he doesn't want the procedure. The court ordered the case back to the lower court trial judge to determine the boy's wishes, with a decision expected later this year.
So I wonder: Does religious freedom apply within the nuclear family? Other than tradition passed down within male-dominated cultures where wives and children were considered chattel of men, why do modern parents believe we hold the right to force our children to practice certain religious beliefs? Why don't we expose our children to multiple religions without picking one, and them let them decide for themselves as adults -- as we do with most important decisions, such as careers, spouses and where to live?
Most Western civilizations no longer force women or children to marry against their will or follow orders from the patriarchal forces in the family. Why does religion, at times, seem to be an exception? Or is sharing your religious beliefs with your children simply part of being a loving, supportive parent?
Maybe my parents, through their lack of religious beliefs, did technically "force" their near-atheism on me as a child. How could they not? Parental rights aside, do parents invariably influence their children's religion? Where does the line between influence and coercion lie? Do you have religious beliefs different from your parents's? Has your religion ever been questioned or rejected by your parents? Do you believe one of your parental rights is to choose a religion for your children?
I thought it might be interesting to hear people's take here. If you go to the blog and read the comments, you'll see many people take issue with the word "force." Is it force when you are simply teaching your child what you believe? And like most of the commenters there, I feel that parents certainly have the right to raise their children in their own religion or beliefs as they see fit, as long as there is no abuse, and hopefully the kid will have the ability to think critically and make up their own mind when they are an adult. Pushing too hard usually backfires anyway. So what are your thoughts?