Please Share your Experiences of Abusive Judicial Committee Meetings

by flipper 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • flipper
    flipper

    I had noticed on the board recently of several posters mentioning what they , or someone they know has gone through being brought before a Jehovah's Witness Judicial Committee - so I thought it would be good to share experiences so we all can get an idea of what has worked for some of you in dealing with it , and also methods to use when dealing with the elders , and it might open some lurkers eyes to the injustices suffered by many - which by the way usually isn't discussed in the rank and file witnesses .

    Many of you know my experience - so I will be brief. Long story short I was inactive for 3 and a half years , scripturally free to remarry , had not attended meetings for that long. Then an ex-wife , an active JW tried to cause me and my fiance distress by telling elders I had pre-marital sex with my fiance. A huge battle ensued with elders harassing my new wife and me for the next 9 months . Because I was innocent - I refused to meet in a JC meeting with the elders, they got pissed, DFed me in absentia ( 2 elders drove 90 miles out of their way to my house to tell me I had been DFed !) I appealed the decision so I could still talk to my 82 and 80 year old parents. The society overturned the disfellowshipping decision , due to lack of evidence, and my wife and I have been able to continue our lives in peace for the last year with no further harassment !

    So- I ask you folks , what experiences have you had of abusive treatment, how did you handle it ? Were you able to vent, or just deal with it ? Did you fight it , or accept the fate they handed to you ? The elders expect many, I believe , to just fall into line with what the organization says will happen to you. They don't like feisty publishers rebelling and shaking the apple cart - so to speak ! LOL! So , as always I look forward to what you have learned, and your experiences ! Peace out to all, Mr. Flipper

  • flipper
    flipper

    I'm sure I'm not alone in having crazy harassing experiences from elders bent on breaking every vestige of a happy enduring life here ! LOL! Is there anybody with an experience of the elders screwing them over in judicial committees ? Look forward to hearing from you

  • restrangled
    restrangled

    Hey Flipper,

    Initially for me each elder met on the couch in my parents home.....I can't remember how many but each came individually letting me know I was worthless... reading scriptures about how terrible I was.....this was before the JC committee was formed. I have blocked out a whole lot of it but I can remember one of them stating I was an absolute reject according to god. I can remember running from the room as he read from the bible. I was 16 years old being told I was the piece of shit I always thought I was.

    No one said other wise and I was soon DF'd after being black mailed into sex by a 21 one year old on public reproof.

    It is a nightmare that can never be resolved.

    If you would like the details according to another 5 men on the committee assigned by the society for the reversal of the original decision. Send me a private PM......It left me numb for years. At age 48 I find it alarming that my parents allowed this at all. It has left me stunted my entire life....stunted from god, religion, the bible.....take your pick.....but one clear thing I learned...the JW's are a hideous religion.

  • cognizant dissident
    cognizant dissident

    I consider the whole process of being expected to confess your personal "sins and shortcomings" to your fellow equals who have self-appointed themselves your judges, jury and executioners, to be abusive.

    Therefore, I choose not to participate.

    Cog

  • flipper
    flipper

    RESTRANGLED- I am truly sorry you had to go through what you did as such a young woman my friend. It is insidious and corrupt how elders turn on young people and others to make them feel guilty about everything ! No wonder most Jehovah's Witnesses exiting the cult have a inferiority complex. They are made to belittle themselves and feel bad about themselves. Many have no self esteem coming out of the witnesses. My dear sis - you have a PM.

    COGNIZANT DISSENDENT- I agree with you COZ ! I don't agree that men who bleed red like you and me should be able to judge us for anything ! You hit the nail on the head when you said " self appointed". That is the crux of the matter. They are " legends in their own minds" and are about as useless as tits on a boar hog ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • kerj2leev
    kerj2leev

    Who Cares......Jesus....it was all bullshit anyways!

  • flipper
    flipper

    KERJ2 LEEV- You are right- it was all bull$hit anyway - that being said there are a lot of people exiting the witness cult who I'm sure would like to hear how some people have dealt with these situations in a successful way at times. Or- when finding out experiences some have gone through it helps them to know we are not alone in problems we have gone through. So I think that is a good thing

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    I was one of the JC. There was one matter that was pretty cut and dried and we had no option but to DF. It felt like beating someone who was already down. It pained me then and it pains me now. I have mentioned it here in the past but it's too painful to talk about the details again.

    kerj. Who cares? I do and it was 30 yrs ago

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    And they wonder why I plan to blow mine off (if I ever get one).

  • Tired of the Hypocrisy
    Tired of the Hypocrisy

    A close relative of mine was raped by the maintenance man of her senior citizen apartment complex. She went to the elders for help and they mistreated her verbally and accused her of laying with him and now trying to ease her conscience. They made her cry and told her they would contact her with their "verdict". 1 month, 2 months,3 then 4 and finally six months go by. She is in Limbo, ashamed now because of the demeaning things she was told, and not able to face the brothers in the hall.

    After the six months her daughter calls the po and asks him wtf they are doing waiting so long and torturing her like this. He told her daughter that she had been disfellowshipped! It was announced at the hall the week following her jc and she should have been there to hear it!!!! He calls the mom and tells her, "Mrs. so and so. You have bween disfellowshipped and hung up." This assbag's name is Chicas and he had been serving in the West Sacramento congregation.

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