How to get rid of Jw's...lol

by Hope4Others 12 Replies latest social humour

• 

  Hope4Others

  Just a couple of silly jokes I saw that made me grin....I could just see it now.....

  1. Answer the door with a bloody knife and say, "I'm sorry, could you come back in a half hour? We're not done with the virgin yet."

  2. Make a chalk outline of a human body on the pavement in your driveway, and place a few copies of "The Watchtower" scattered around...

  I'm sure there a tons out there, that give you a little chuckle. What did we use to say about this as a jw, something like "well it still gives a witness these jokes and that

  means they we are very active and the work is getting noticed....Oh, pleeeeeezzzzzz!

  Cheers!

  hope4others
• 

  free2think

  LOL H4O, so have you still got your 'guests'?
• 

  brinjen

  Those two are my favourite also.

  When they tell you they are here to spread the word of the bible (or something like that ) say "great, what would you like to know?"
• 

  Bring_the_Light

  1. Identify youself as an Ex-JW/Apostate.

  2. Show up at door in underwear and IMMEDIATELY invite them in, have pre-positioned porn playing on the television, act like there's nothing wrong, mute the porn but leave it on like it was the evening news or something talk totally about how interested you are in their message and how you can be saved in Armageddon.
• 

  Hope4Others

  No, parents left this morning....lol

  They don't come down to often, but talk on the phone lots.

  I just bite my lip lots,

  Went not too bad....

  h40
• 

  Wordly Andre

  Put a sign near your front door that reads: Apostate World Headquaters
• 

  Anti-Christ

  Show up at door in underwear and IMMEDIATELY invite them in, have pre-positioned porn playing on the television, act like there's nothing wrong, mute the porn but leave it on like it was the evening news or something talk totally about how interested you are in their message and how you can be saved in Armageddon.
• 

  Hope4Others

  2. Show up at door in underwear and IMMEDIATELY invite them in, have pre-positioned porn playing on the television, act like there's nothing wrong, mute the porn but leave it on like it was the evening news or something talk totally about how interested you are in their message and how you can be saved in Armageddon.

  I don't know if that's something I'd do but it sure is funny.....lol

  h40
• 

  momzcrazy

  A guy goes up to my friend's friend and asks, "Can I talk to you about God?" She says, "Sure, what would you like to know?"

  Please, come in, I used to be a Jehovah's Witness.
  I have a lot of things to explain, do you want to know why I left the cult?"
• 

  Low-Key Lysmith

  A few months ago, on a Saturday morning, I was catching up on some typing in my home office. I live in a cul-de-sac & can see people entering the street from my office window. I saw a couple of dudes go to my neighbor's door & knew immediately that they were JWs.

  I had purchased a T-shirt in Seattle a couple of days prior that reads:

  "Here is the church

  Here is the steeple

  Open the doors...

  And see all the deluded, brainwashed morons".

  I had been waiting for the perfect opportunity to wear the T-shirt, & this seemed like the ideal time.

  I put the T-shirt on and grabbed a half-full bottle of scotch from the bar on my way to answer the door.

  I stood there in the doorway with a huge grin on my face, cradling the bottle of single-malt & tried to give them my best pseudo-drunk look. I told them to "come on in & have a drink".

  They declined.