If you've served as an elder for any significant amount of time, you've likely seen some things that just don't set right with you - it doesn't take long. I was an idealistic young man with a family when I was appointed in the mid 1980's. My wife and I were third generation JW's, both having served as regular pioneers.
Sadly, this period of time is somewhat blurry with respects to my family. The demands of work and the organization did not leave sufficient time for family or self. I do recall, however, many of my early impressions as a new elder.
While some of the elders showed balance, moderation and good judgement, others were very opinionated with a propensity to serve as "busybodies" in the affairs of others.
I remember one brother in particular (I'll call him Br. P) who had a serious problem in this regard. Br. "P" had only a high school education but thought he knew it all. Bristling with overconfidence, Br. "P" was a "country-boy" who didn't know the difference between a "fleshly organism" and a "fleshly orgasm" as he put it when reading that famous verse in Proverbs.
Br. "P", was nothing short of a bull in a china shop and it was a full time job to keep him restrained. At one of my early elders meetings, he persisted in his demands to impose one of his goofy ideas on the flock - I can't even recall which one it was since there were so many. What I do remember was that it took the entire body of elders nearly an hour to convince him to back-down. This was not a pleasant thing to behold. I was somewhat shocked to see the way some of these "elders" would carry on. These were men "appointed by holy spirit", at least so I thought.
At the time, I remember feeling so grateful to have had some of the more moderate individuals on the body. I came to view several of these brothers as "mentors". One in particular - I'll call him Br. "D" - was a soft-spoken individual who was an exceptional teacher. He took the lead in showing honor to others and became a dear friend and "father-like" figure for me. Br. "D" had the ability to put you completely at ease. When you spoke to him, you always knew he was really listening and really cared. One of the finest individuals I have ever known.
I only saw Br. "D" upset one time and that was when Br. "P" pulled one of his stunts.
Br, "D" died a few years ago. I think a part of me died right then too. With the loss of Br. "D" and the departure of other moderate brothers on our local body of elders, it became harder to restrain Br. "P". Soon the balance of power shifted and Br. "P" could not be restrained. Emboldened by the awful example of one circuit overseer, Br. "P" no longer saw any need to restrain himself and the body of elders continued its slide to the right.
It was in this atmosphere where I was confronted with my convictions and personal crisis. Already aware of much of the truth about the Watchtower Society, I felt obliged to take a stand and do what I could to protect the friends in the local congregation from what I can only describe as "oppressive wolves." This was my personal "Alamo".
There is quite a story to be told about happened in this period of my life. I choose not to reveal too many details at this time but I'll share a few.
I can remember the last visit of the C.O. He blasted the congregation and used every dirty little trick in the book to make the friends feel guilty, even reading his nasty little report to the congregation, making fun of people with Chronic Fatigue and depression, etc.
It was so bad, that the body met following the visit and decided unanimously that we had to do something about this vile, woman hating man but we couldn't decide what to. Let me give you one example to illustrate. Out in field service, this C.O would say things like, "look at how short that woman's skirt is…I could measure the distance between her orifices."
In any event, we met again a few days later and took another vote. Now it was 7-2 in favor of acting. Br. "P", now the P.O., decided that since the vote was not unanimous, we would leave the matter in Jehovah's hands. It became clear that most were concerned about their own "position." I could have cared less.
A few days later I gave a local "special needs" talk, I still have it, and dissected the visit and remarks of the C.O. I used quotes from WTS publications to neutralize all of his poisonous rhetoric. I followed up with a formal complaint to the WTS.
An investigation was launched at the request of the Service Department. The D.O. was sent in and interviewed elders and publishers in numerous congregations. Within a few weeks the D.O. told me he was shocked that all of these various elders knew what was going on and yet I was the only one who had come forward. The C.O. was directed to apologize to each congregation for the remarks he made. That was as far as the matter went.
For a time, things were better for the friends but my actions had alienated me from a majority on the local body. I was a marked man.