WOW and WOW again! I love it - I too, am an 'over-doer' but this is FANTASTIC - just one typo - undue rather than undo somewhere around the middle
By the way, what you say about their inane Bible references is so true...I remember seeing letters to the pioneers full of smarmy sentences followed by scriptural references that probably had zippo to do with what just preceded it.
Once you have this gem completed, you should FRAME a copy for posterity, maybe COPYRIGHT it and sell them with a spot for signature at the bottom - sign me up for one when done - you're probably on to a real good thing here! Really shows them up for what hypocrites they are. WELL DONE!