Bible & Tract Society of NY, Inc.
AN:ASS
To All Bodies of Elders in the United States
May 30, 2008
Dear Brothers:
We are writing as we have recieved directions from the Governing Body Of Jehovah's Witnesses. As will be announced in the September 2008 (Private Edition - TM) of the eternally blessed Watchtower magazine, we are revising how apostates are treated in the local congregations. Due to new light shed on the subject, after reading scriptures that show that Jesus went and lookedfor the lost sheep, we have decided to welcome apostates back into the fold (Prov4:18). As you know, over the next three months, Distrct Conventions will be held throughout the country and are in progress now. Apostates tend to attend on the outside of these conventions and attempt to strike up conversations with unwary witnesses who stray out into the depths of the parking lot.
Brothers in view of this new light shed, we would like to take the mystery out of apostates and bring into the mainstream organization, just as the organization as a whole has been going mainstream in the past 2 decades. Therefore, each Friday of a District Convention will be called Apostate Appreciation Day, and everyone should surround the visiting apostates and welcome them into the fold. This type of love bombing should catch the apostates off guard, and they will likely be willing to attend all three days of the bounteous spiritual feast (Psalms 133:1-3). By taking the mystery out of the identity of the apostates, the rank and file brothers and sisters will be less likely to be curious into their decpetive words.
We trust that this loving arrangement will help stem the tide of those leaving God's spirit directed organization and its Faithful and Discreet slave (Matthew 24:45-47). We send you our warm love and Christian greetings, and Happy Apostate Apreciation days to you all.
Your Brothers,
Watch Tower Bible and Tract Society of NY, Incorporated, and a host of other non-profit corporations also send their love (and thanks for the donations).
Confidential Note to elders:
Please read the above announcement at your next service meeting. Once the apostates have been lured into the organization again, please haul them into Special Judicial Re-Committees and if found guilty of apostasy (they will be), please stone them to death. By keeping the congregation clean in this way, you will be glorifying Jehovah. You may pray that Jehovah disposes of their bodies just as he did with Moses so as to avoid problems with the authorities. This is appropriate in the sight of the Lord since this is Theocratic Warfare.