I agree with Annie on this one. Although I personally would feel rude not offering to share the wine if someone brought it to me. This gift is to be shared with all.
Dinner guest- When you bring wine shouldn't they offer you some?
by Witness 007 47 Replies latest jw friends
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BreakingAway
When it comes to wine there are different opinions from "experts" as to whether or not is should be served to the guest who brought it.If it's decorated that's usually an indicator that it's not meant to be opened that night and the particular event or dinner arrangements also can dictate whether or not it should be served at the time the wine was given.
What's interesting though, is that many people feel it should be served to the guest who brought it.I found this good advice at Cookinglight.com on Essential Wine Etiquette
When a dinner guest brings a bottle of wine as a gift, should you open and serve it?
Yes. Though there’s no way to be sure of your guest’s intention, wine is about communal sharing and fun. So unless the guest specifically requests that you keep and enjoy it later, serve it. Your guest will be pleased. And if you already had a wine you planned to serve, serve both. Tasting both wines will be an educational experience. -
Agnes
Anne has it right. The wine is a gift and the host/hostess shouldn't feel pressured to serve it. They have gone through the effort of planning the occasion, menu and beverages of choice. They may have intentionally chosen not to serve alcoholic beverages and that should choice should be respected. Agnes P.S. very nice of you to bring a gift.
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milligal
Okay I know the answer to this one!!!!
My last position as a hospitality dept. director left me hanging out with the catering director whose clients included many politicians, (including George W) and other various important people, anyway-when someone brings a bottle of wine it is poor manners to throw it in the cabinet-unless you are bringing it as a housewarming gift. But bring it to dinner-yes it should be opened and offered.
On that note, I do not know many JW's who have good manners-I didn't get mine until I left
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Witness 007
Hell, After selling my house, my Real Estate Agent brought me a bottle of nice Champagne and said: "drink this together later." No way, we popped the cork and all had some then and there.....my wife was so happy she "clinked" glasses with him. "Cheers!"
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wha happened?
me thinks it's time for brunch and some wine
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Witness 007
Say you bring a nice Chocolate cake to dinner to help out, and the host says: "Nice!" Any puts it away in the cupboard and serves Vanilla Ice Cream for dessert! Same thing. These people should be taken out and shot!
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changeling
What AnneB said is correct.
If you are asked to bring an item, say a bottle of wine or a side dish, then it's part of the plan and it will be served and consumed. Anything you chose to bring is a gift and should have no strings attached.
You could ask the hosts to serve your wine, as you would like very much for them to try it... But never, ever, ask for your wine or any other other unconsumed item to be returned to you at the end of the evening. I've had witnesses do that to me. It is just plain rude.
If a host hands out leftovers or whatnot as people are leaving that is their prorogative.
changeling :)
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hamsterbait
AnneB-
I think you are rather putting the cart before the horse in your explanation.
Books on etiquette, simply describe what was considered good practice and polite at a particular slice of time.
For instance, if you are going to a far off land, and want to know what is considered "good manners" you would indeed buy an etiquette book, and then go to Persia, and burp over your soup, slurp and smack your lips.
At one time in japan it was considered good etiquette to slurp and guzzle your noodle soup.
At one time, before handkerchiefs, it was considered polite to suck back your catarrh at the dinner table, then spit it on the floor and rub it into the threshings with your shoe. At English dinner parties, there was a piss pot in the corner, where the men relieved themselves without even a screen to hide behind.
In other words, etiquette in every age is in a constant state of flux. Whilst I do not deny that if you went to a banquet with the Queen of England, you would not expect her to serve your wine, we are talking good manners among ornary folses here.
I once brought a good chablis to a small dinner, and the hosts then served a cheap lambrusco. It made me uncomfortable. Oh and then the guests were given dish towels and a sink of soapy water to wash up. (Since when was it good etiquette to get your guests to wash up?)
nowadays most people expect their wine to be served to them when they bring it.
Good manners (etiquette) are there to make your guests feel welcome and comfortable. Embarrassing them by pointing out use of wrong forks, or whisking their good wine away and then serving vinegar is not likely to do this.
I wonder if these particular hosts would have complained had these people turned up with nothing?
HB
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MissingLink
We went to a pioneer sisters house for dinner one time. She was from somewhere around Jamacia. She had mentioned before how she couldn't find nice Rum. So I managed to track some down and take a nice (expensive) bottle for our dinner. She was thrilled to get it, but that think went straight into the cabinet.
She made spicy chicken and rice, but left out the spice on everyone but hers because "white people cant eat it". I asked her for some of the spicy stuff. After a warning, she watched in amazement as I ate it. It was good, and not at all what I would consider spicy. She said she'd never seen a white person eat spicy food before. I hinted that some rum would go nice with this. She agreed, then changed the subject. No rum for me.
She also kicked us out at 8PM because it was getting late. I think she wanted some private time with that bottle of rum.