Musings of a fader: July 4 picnic

by truthseeker 10 Replies latest jw friends

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  truthseeker

  I have been a fader for sometime now. Yesterday was the first time that I went to a July 4 picnic and fireworks - not that I went to specifically celebrate that day, I just wanted to get out and see people, see life.

  I was raised in the truth and because of this I had many preconceived notions and ideas - one of them being that worldly people weren't fit to associate with, that anyone not serving Jehovah would only "spoil my useful habits."

  I wandered around the park and for the first time I just observed people without any pre-existing conditions - there was a lot of activities for children, face painting, candle making and various rides and people dressed up as cartoon characters. Everyone seemed to be having a good time.

  People were just being people.

  There were a few religious stands here and there, scattered about throughout the park. One member tried to recruit me - said I could be a "world citizen" - I respectfully declined, as I am kind of between faiths right now.

  All in all, it was a good time, but I couldn't help thinking what I had missed out on during my youth. Not July 4 specifically, but just getting out, meeting new people and having fun.

  This is what the youth of Jehovah's Witnesses are denied - a chance to be themselves, to pursue their goals - their lives are rules by the authoritarian hand of the Governing Body who tell them what they can and cannot do.

  Growing up as a JW youth, I was a mere observer, watching life go by while my own life stood still.
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  Lady Zombie

  Those were the wicked worldly people we were taught to hate and fear. When you get a chance to actually experience mingling with them, you find that they're just people.

  Also, isn't it funny how many of the so-called worldly people are more accepting than the JWs. A worldly person doesn't care about your manner of dress, whether you watch R rated movies, how long your hair is, or how many FS hours you have this month. Most take you as you are.

  And yet, the JWs are supposed to be the epitome of Christian goodness.
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  Troggle

  I find it funny that growing up as a JW I was always scared to tell my friends what was on my mind or how I felt about things because I didn't want to lose them. I was always being judged no matter what I did. It wasn't untill I was out that I made what I would call a real friend. Someone who might not agree with how I think about something or maybe some of the things I do, but I know I can still discuss it with them and it won't end our friendship.
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  oompa

  good observations TS....I too have noticed what great neighbors i have...and totally freaked out my jw wife by wanting the to come over for a cookout and beer....she was terrorfied...omg...they are WORLDLY!.....shoot me already.............oompa.........so wish i was in tahoe right now at the big apostafest!!!!!!!dammit..........
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  Quirky1

  I wish I was in tahoe right now at the big apostafest!!!!!!!dammit..........

  Me too!!!!
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  blondie

  I grew up differently because I had a non-jw father with lots of socializing with non-jws. The self-righteous jws felt that we were bad association because my father wasn't a jw so we weren't invited anywhere even without my father. But the non-jws were friendly, generous, and social with us. Good thing. We also socialized with the non-jw relatives and I found that they weren't demons after all. So my viewpoint while a jw was always very different. It was sad to hear jws say that they didn't associate with their non-jw family. I always said how would they ever be able to have a discussion about the Bible. (initiated by the non-jw of course). I wondered what their sins were that were any worse than those I saw at the jw parties, gossip, drunkenness, flirting with someone else's spouse, destructive children, thieving jw visitors, swearing, dirty jokes, questionable movies, "add your own"?
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  Hope4Others

  Its surprising how life just opens up to special beginnings, things aren't as evil
  as has been hammered into our brains for so long. One person is like the next,
  just experiencing life.
  
  I wish I was in Tahoe right now at the big apostafest!!!!!!!dammit..........
  
  Me Three!!!!
  
  
  h4o
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  Greensleeves

  You are a Jedi Master on the forums and have a lot of posts. Being a "fader" has to be the worst form of Hell. Speaking of Hell, you should know that every other Christian religion teaches it. Here is your quote:

  There were a few religious stands here and there, scattered about throughout the park. One member tried to recruit me - said I could be a "world citizen" - I respectfully declined, as I am kind of between faiths right now.

  By stating, "between faiths" I assume that you think there is another religion you might be able to go to. That would require believing in things like Hell and the Trinity. The JW's are right in their critisism of these beliefs. Very true they are to call others false religion. But so are they. There is NO true religion, and switching one "flag" to another is not going to fulfill your search for truth or God. It will just lead you into another organized belief system. Sorry to be so blunt.
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  SnakesInTheTower

  truthseeker:

  Yesterday was the first time that I went to a July 4 picnic and fireworks - not that I went to specifically celebrate that day, I just wanted to get out and see people, see life.

  ME TOO!..... I went too for the first time to the major 4th of July celebration in this metropolitan area (and ranked in the top 10 fireworks displays in the country)... got to hear a great Blues singer (Joss Stone..who could think a 21 year old white girl from UK could sing blues like the best of the black women blues singers...and look so damn fine while doing it?....lol.........) She was part of the entertainment lineup at the free concert that is part of a summer weekend series downtown that happened to fall on 7/4 this year... and I got to spend time with my youngest (nonJW) brother and his GF....all in all... a great first 4th of july weekend of freedom....

  .....and not once thinking anything judgemental about it all....well....I was a little judgemental of a couple of the ghetto hoochies in the crowd letting their ugliness hang out..but thats just calling a spade a spade, not JW elderishness,....some things I just dont want to see without wanting to burn my eyes out....lol.....

  Although I will say..I still have a little "fader paranoia".....as we were leaving downtown, I passed a news crew doing a live remote spot.....I avoided the camera guy that was recording for the local Fox affiliate...I really dont need any hassle from the local yokels...my fade seems to be going well...as I also missed out on the Grand Boasting Session being held in a nearby town this weekend...

  Snakes ()
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  independent_tre

  That's something to think about. There are ones at my former congregation whose attitudes and general personality stunk far worse than many of the wordly people I've met. And they do this all the while looking down on everyone that's not a jw.

  But it has been hard to let go of some of the ingrained jw snootie-ness and being judgemental, like everytime I talk to someone with a potty mouth or that's cheating on his/her mate, I automatically jump on guard thinking they are bad association or afraid of being contaminated by "the spirit of the world'.