My story

by Newborn 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • Newborn
    Newborn

    Dear All, thank you for your warm welcome! This is my story in short (pls excuse wrong spellings, English is not my native tongue and that it still became quite long).

    I'm 34 and was born into the truth by parents who in their turn were baptist in young age. I have one older sister who is currently serving at Bethel with her husband and a younger brother who never embraced the truth (which was my big sorrow for many years). My parents has been inactive now since more than 10 yrs. My father, as elder and presiding overseer, saw and experienced A LOT of evilness and injustices and just couldn't stand it anymore. Shouldn't you find love in Gods organisation? (well, his story is another long story but im sure you can understand what it was all about). Of course this was my and my sisters greatest sorrow in life that they were no longer in the truth,(however, they have avoided getting d-shipped in order to be able to see us) and everyone felt pity for us that they were now to be killed at Jehovahs great day and not be with us in paradise. Never could I've imagine that I'd come to realise that they were the ones including my brother who were right and hence more intelligent then me all the time.

    Anyway, I've been an exemplary (extreme) sister all my life, I never allowed myself to have fun and was very careful not to do anything wrong, in all areas. I became a regular pioneer at 16, right after school (even though I could not explain a lot of the teachings and didn't find it especially fun to preach, but I exherted myself and made a lot of sacrifices in order to please Jehovah). I had to stop pioneering after 4 yrs though since my hips and legs were worn out. My father had to force me to stop since I had too bad concience to give it up myself. The service identified me since I had denied any other interest or desires all the time. I love music, singing and dancing and would probably have pursued such carreer, I can griev that now. As most witnesses who are grown up in the truth, I got married quite young at age 22, since you're not allowed to show or express any desires of love, closeness or sex otherwise. I fell in love with my husband the minute I saw him at a convention and we go married after one year. If I'm honest to myself, it was never a happy marriage even though we've experienced many good times and I can honestly say I loved him. Our sex life was a disaster and it turned out he had many physical and psycological problems. He never had a job and I've been working full time supporting him for 12 yrs. He's been inactive more than half our marriage while I've been doing basically everything myself. The congr praised me for being so loyal. He isolated himself and had noone except me. We lived a very un-normal life as you can see. But as all JW you struggle on to do Gods will. "Jehovah hates divorce" and "the one that endures to the end will be saved". I more or less accepted to be so miserable. The thoughts of doubt has been growing since approx one year. I said to myself that I must be doing something very wrong since Jehovah did not answer any of my prayers I'd been praying for almost my whole marriage. (and I was doing wrong, I was fantasing about other men, since our sex life was unexisting and I was masturbating. I was at least a bit balanced since I told myself that God could not possibly judge me for that since he had created me with these desires. Then I started to think more and more about the fact that I've had bad conscience all my life and that most witnsesses I've ever known are unhappy and depressed. Shouldn't we, according to the bible, be a happy people? I explained that with that we are Satans target. Also the fact that I prefered to be with my work colleagues, all wonderful and kind people, more than the friends at kh, told me something was wrong. Why did I have such a good time with these "dangerous" people, whom you shouldn't talk or be with unless to preach. I also said to myself how can i teach people to behave in a way that I can never live up to myself? These thoughts started to grow more and more, but not without much guilt and pain. I was convinced Satan had now taken a hold of me and I was now going to die at Harmageddon. How sad it is indeed.

    In short, I've now decided to leave the org (will try not to be d-shipped in order to be able to see my sister) as well as my husband and have currently moved home to my parents. Who are a great support and comfort to me now. I've read R. Franz book and come to realise so many things. I've been fooled my whole life so far. I'm even sure now that the org belongs to false religion. The GB are no better than the pharisees putting so many burdens on people. Controlling it's members every step even into their bed rooms. I'm amazed how so many people can swallow all this bullshit year after year. (I think that if you're looking up the word brainwashing in a dictionary it will say "JWs) . I also think that the rules of d-shipping is the one of the biggest proof of false hood. It is just another way of strict and evil control. Well, you know all this and so much more of the facts.

    I've never felt more happy and free as now and are even in love again but will take it very slow. I'm still young and hope I've many happy years in front of me.

    There are of course much more to say but I'm sure you've got the sense of it. I'll continue to write more I'm sure many times. I'd be grateful for your comments and thoughts to the above.

    I'm so glad and appreciative of that you're here and I love reading your messages and stories also.

    Talk to you soon!
    /Newborn

  • quietlyleaving
    quietlyleaving

    Hi newborn

    I'm really sorry that all these bad things have happened to you because of and through the wts. But adversity seems to be bringing out your fighting spirit.

    welcome to jwd.

    ql

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    Thanks for sharing your story on this board. And, congratulations on taking control of your situation and not letting yourself stay stuck in a bad religion or in a bad marriage. You deserve to make such choices and to be happy. Life has so much more to offer than serving men of false promises.

  • snowbird
    snowbird

    Newborn, your story is well-written and understandable.

    It resonates with me because I used to feel the same way. I actually envied those so-called worldly people.

    Welcome to JWD. I hope you'll stay with us for a while.

    Sylvia

  • Outaservice
    Outaservice

    The 23 Psalm says: '.....He restorest my soul...........' You have now started on the path of 'restoration' with your new life.

    Congratulations.

    Outaservice

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    Welcome to the forum.

    I hope that you now have a better relationship with your parents.

    Also glad that you have made friends on the outside before your exit. Hope others in your family can also see their way out and join you!!!

  • Velvetann
    Velvetann

    Newborn Welcome to the JWD and thanks so much for sharing your story. I am so glad you finally are free of the "Lie" of the JW religion.

    Your story was easy to read, your English is good. May I ask what is your first language??

    Velvet

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    You did great telling your story. I am glad I read it.

    Life is a struggle, but you are on the right path now- the one you choose.

    Power and strength to you.

  • BabaYaga
    BabaYaga

    I'm afraid I understand much of your story far, far too well.

    Hello and welcome!

    Love,
    Baba.

  • LockedChaos
    LockedChaos

    Newborn

    Thank you for sharing your story

    Letting it out can be liberating

    Being part of an organization

    is not a requirement for

    spirituality if that's your choice

    It's great that you can share more time

    with your parents

    Please don't be a stranger here

    I look forward to hearing more in the future

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit