Naw, you become officially liberated.
Holidays-nervous about celebrating them but don't understand why.
by QuestioningEverything 27 Replies latest jw friends
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halcyon
For me, there were a couple of things going on. Mostly, I was worried that even though no one comes by, maybe *this time* when I have my decorations up, *someone* will decide to stop by, and will instantly run back to everyone back home, and then a car will pull up the next day and three elders will advance on me, corner me and physically grab me and drag me into the car and take me into a JC meeting where I will be locked up in prison for the rest of my life unless I renounce my disbelief.
Loss of control of my own life, "in case someone sees me."
As far as halloween goes, it shocked me initially that it was celebrated in the church. But then it instantly hit me: Halloween isn't a holiday CELEBRATING and WORSHIPPING the demons ... it's a holiday that "acknowledges" that they exist and remind people of the fact, but in reality it's supposed to "scare away" any demons (All Souls Day), and then be followed the next day by All Saints Day, which triumphs over the demons.
So if you believe in demons, the holiday isn't about "worshipping" them. It's really kinda just exposing their powerlessness. If you don't believe in demons, then relabel it in your mind: "celebration of the horror movie genre."
And Easter became incredibly important to me. It replaced the memorial because I FINALLY get to partake! Which I believe is incredibly important to me!
I have a harder time with nationalism, because it's a 20th century divisive tactic that does little good in the world. I hate to be part of it. -
AudeSapere
Haven't read all the responses but this caught my eye:
I can't get out of my head the connection with evil and the devil/demons. My boys want to go trick or treating.
Stay in the moment. If you don't want evil devil and demons, have the kids select other costumes.
Don't worry so much about the 'origin'. You know that you and your family are not engaging to connect with demons. You are setting your own tradition and can assign the meaning that YOU want to the occaision.
I'm glad you are exploring the holidays. Wish I had done the same alot earlier!
About other nervousness - Many worldly (tm) people also get nervous about holidays this time of year. Sometimes we put so many expectations on ourselves and our families. Instead of trying to have the *perfect* holiday celebration, find things that will have meaning for you. My first decorating attempt I felt like such a clod. An ex-jw witness was quick to help me decorate and my house looked great. You may want to ask a friend or neighbor to help you.
Happy Holidays!
-Aude.
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Seeker4
I'm now an atheist, but I still enjoy the holidays in my own way. I go trick or treating with some of my grandkids. I don't worry about demons or devils cause they don't exist.
I've come to peace with all this because I think it's just great to have an excuse to dress up or get together or to party. Lori and I don't do much with decorations, no Xmas tree or anything, and we're more likely to celebrate a solstice than other holidays.
It's just a matter of having fun, wishing people a happy holiday and generally feeling good. I do very limited gift giving, having watched tons of gifts turned to trash in a matter of hours.
S4 -
only me
My daughters and I had our first Halloween last year. We were nervous too but only had to go to a couple doors and we were hooked. It was soo much fun.
The weather was unusually warm and all the people were out on their porches to admire all the costumes.
Even the people who weren't home left treats out with signs to take one.
We're going again this year, I'm only sorry it took so long to try it. -
halcyon
I wish I could go, but with no young children left at home, I think it would be silly for a middle-aged bumble bee to go around begging candy from the neighbors ....
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jamiebowers
Well, I must be a real HEDONIST, because celebrating the holidays didn't bother me one bit. I celebrated Christmas just weeks after I got df'd. Anyway, you kind of sound like a reluctant atheist if you believe in demons. Think of it this way, IF there is a god, do you really think He or She would begrudge your kids trick or treating? IF Satan and his demons really exist, why would they bother your kids when there are so many others out there indulging in trick or treating? Do you really think all of the kids who participate are demonized? IF demons really exist, why aren't they possessing you for doing things that are linked to paganism, i.e. wearing a wedding ring, using the names of the days of the week and months of the year?
Sweetie, it's called mind control for a reason. Every time you have to face a WB&TS inculcated fear in your life, take a deep breath and think logically. To break free from these bastards, all you have to do is make a check list. Which is more demon-like: allowing your kids to go trick or treating or covering up the molestation of children / Allowing yourself and your kids to live a normal life or break up families with lies and mental manipulation?
What you are going through is completely normal. I've been out for 20 years, and even though I didn't have a hard time with holidays, there are things even to this day where my view is colored because of my exposure to the cult. Use us for support and be happy. Hey, you might consider dressing up for Halloween too. You'll get to see why kids love it so much. Have fun!
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AudeSapere
I wish I could go, but with no young children left at home, I think it would be silly for a middle-aged bumble bee to go around begging candy from the neighbors ....
Where there is a will, there is a way... Do you have friends with kids or grandkids? Ask if you can go with them. For some parents this is a chore. They may even let you go alone with the kids. A friend of mine does not put out much decorations but she dresses up as a scary witch. Then acts like she is mechanical. Weird mechanical voice and all. She has a blast and the kids are delighted when she opens the door to them. If you want to participate, you can go all out in your own way. Enjoy! -Aude.
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BabaYaga
Of course you feel nervous! You have been hard-wired conditioned to knee-jerk at these things for how many years now? Do not be upset with yourself for your hesitation. Treat yourself with love and respect and give yourself time to ease into these things. The point is to enjoy it... take things at your own pace.
Just add more and more things each year as you feel comfortable with them. It worked great for me! I really balked at Halloween at first... it really freaked me out. I cannot BELIEVE that now, looking back! I live for Halloween now! ha!
Have fun... and take your time!
Love,
Baba. -
OUTLAW
You have been programed to fear celebrating Holidays..Old habits die hard.....Time to start some new habits.....Participate in celebrating the Holidays!!..You will enjoy yourself!..And..The remaining years you have in your life..........................
...OUTLAW
...OUTLAW