Do You Give Others the Benefit of the Doubt? (page 2)

Witness 007

On the other hand I always give people a fair go...that's Australian!

SnakesInTheTower

I give benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise. I do find it hard to trust people now...actually, more so now ..but its always been tough to trust.

I will never give the FDS the benefit of the doubt again...fool me once, shame on you, fool me ~~twice~~ thousands of times shame on me.

Snakes ()

Lady Lee

Hmmm

Do You Give Others the Benefit of the Doubt?

I think this is tied closely to trust issues. it is something we learn. Even a baby will learn that neglect or abuse hurts and react to it. If the infant's needs are taken care of the infant will learn to trust those who care for them. But when those needs are not taken care of the ability to trust others gets very skewed.

Is it your nature to do so, or do you have to work at it

Now this is turned around in my case. I learned as a child I had no rights.People could do whatever they wanted to me. It took me many years to learn about boundaries and that I could say NO.

Due to all the betrayals in my life I have learned to watch people carefully. I still want to see the good. I watch to see if their words match their actions. When there is any doubt I am very cautious.

NOW, once the trust is broken, I am very reluctant to let it go and give second or third or fourth chances like I used to do.

LongHairGal

Co-co,

This question cannot be answered with a simple yes or no. We have all been in a religion that tried to get us to let down our guard and defenses. We were made to feel that we should act against our natural instinct of self-preservation because of a so-called brotherhood. Because of this, many of us were hurt and are a little screwed up with regard to boundaries and the like.

Just giving people an across the board 'benefit of the doubt' would leave you wide open for anything. You would have to consider the circumstances and the person. It is on a case by case basis.

LHG

compound complex

Dear Friends:

A quick hello and thank you for these enlightening thoughts. I look forward to responding to your comments upon my return.

With gratitude,

CoCo

compound complex

Once again I thank all of you for your fine comments.

Please note a comment from Aid to Bible Understanding, page 1083, paragraph 2, regarding Love "believes all things":

Love produces confidence in one's faithful Christian brothers, not suspecting them or disbelieving them
unless there is absolute proof that they are wrong. - 2 Cor. 2:3; Gal. 5:10; Philem. 21.

CoCo

yknot

Yes and Yes it is my nature to do so....

I am an abounding optimist to my own detriment sometimes, but it still beats being cynical and jaded.

I recover and go bouncing on my way singing an annoyingly happy tune..... live, love, learn and laugh.

If someone wrongs me, I try to learn the lesson and pray for their miserable love lacking soul.

Only love lacking miserable people hate or hurt others.

daniel-p

It's a much better world when you do.

fokyc

Also from Insight book:

***

it-2p.278Love***

Love

"believes all things." Love has faith in the things God has said in his Word of truth, even if outward appearances are against it and the unbelieving world scoffs. This love, especially toward God, is a recognition of his truthfulness, based on his record of faithfulness and reliability, just as we know and love a true, faithful friend and do not doubt when he tells us something for which we may not have proof. (Jos 23:14) Love believes all God says, though it may not be able to grasp it thoroughly, and it is willing to wait patiently until the matter is more fully explained or until getting a clear understanding. (1Co 13:9-12; 1Pe 1:10-13) Love also trusts in God’s direction of the Christian congregation and his appointed servants and backs up their decisions based on God’s Word. (1Ti 5:17; Heb 13:17) However, love is not gullible, for it follows the counsel of God’s Word to "test the inspired expressions to see whether they originate with God," and it tests everything by the measuring rule of the Bible. (1Jo 4:1; Ac 17:11, 12) Love produces confidence in one’s faithful Christian brothers; a Christian would not suspect them or disbelieve them unless there was absolute proof that they were wrong.—2Co 2:3; Ga 5:10; Phm 21.

fokyc

Do You Give Others the Benefit of the Doubt?

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