On the outside my husband and I always looked spiritually strong, but I always felt weak and lesser than because I had doubts. Now I hear little things that people say about me. Like she went to college, she works outside the home, she has worldly associates that's what made them weak. We have some family members that say it's a headship issue in our home, and my husband needs to take control and make me go to the meetings ( he doesn't want to go either). O my favorite is that our marriage is on the rocks. I know it's just words but sometimes it gets to me. If they only knew I left from a point of strength not weakness. Thanks for the post and a chance to vent.
Whats Your Level of Maturity? Spiritually That Is.....
by AllTimeJeff 14 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
-
-
Fadeout
In the days leading up to my departure, I gradually began arguing more strongly that the spiritually mature are more difficult to offend, while the immature take offense easily... in direct contrast to popular JW opinion, of course, since the pioneers, elder's wives, etc. are always the snootiest.
Suppose that was an early warning sign of the independent thinking that would eventually stumble me...
-
Billy the Ex-Bethelite
I, too, thought I'd attained a high level of spiritual maturity. I was in the Spiritual Hub of Jehovah's earthly organization, after all. But it was very difficult to keep ignoring "common sense". I kept following the leaders unquestioningly, until the generation change. That troubled me. Then the blood fractions. That troubled me more. Then as I was around the "heavies" in Bethel, I didn't see their attitude as particularly spiritual, but egotistical. It was as if there had been an invisible struggle between good and evil, and evil had won at Watchtower. I almost felt like a prophet as I could foresee a grim future for anyone residing in Bethel, so I left.
Shortly afterward, the layoffs began. Supposedly that was to get more "spiritually mature" people out to help with the harvesting in the field... yeah, I knew that was a pack of lies. When I heard more about the molestation lawsuits, that troubled me. As events in the local congregation have unfolded, it's become clear that the JW level of "spiritual maturity" involves neither spirituality, nor maturity. Now, I guess I'm so spiritually mature that I'm somewhere between atheist and agnostic.
As I look back at what has changed with the passage of time, obviously Watchtower has always been wrong. However, even after the 1975 fiasco, there were things to put faith in with the Kings of the North and South, the Generation, the UN, the cry of Peace and Security, impending destruction of false religion, etc. It seemed so viable. But all of that has dissolved. The only thing left is to have faith in the bOrg and the GB. Consequently, the "spiritually mature" are the "most blindly misguided".
Also, the "spiritually mature" now need to have very short-term memories. Know this week's Botchtower lesson really well, but be prepared to forget it as soon as WT theology gets revamped. The only thing that needs to be remembered long-term is that the end is very, very near... and follow the GB.
B the X
-
Gregor
Also, the "spiritually mature" now need to have very short-term memories. Know this week's Botchtower lesson really well, but be prepared to forget it as soon as WT theology getsrevamped. The only thing that needs to be remembered long-term is that the end is very, very near... and follow the GB.
B the X
So true. You tuck into what is advertised as real spiritual meat and potatoes and later it turns out to have been puffed rice cereal..
-
SnakesInTheTower
short answer:
I consider myself a spiritual person now...but not a religious person.....probably more aware of things than I ever was as a dub. I believe something put us here, but I dont believe that something requires anything as uniquely human and as petty as "worship." I try to minimize my impact on the planet and respect what was created for us to use. But organized religion, or even prayer? no thanks.
longer answer:
I never quite beat to the JW drum the way they wanted me too. Even as a child, they couldnt scare me with their "Big A" threats looming around the corner, or entice me with the fairy tale of Paradise... I believed it, dont get me wrong......but felt somewhere deep down that "Jehovah" was the one that decided who got to stay and who got to go...not a bunch of elders or old geezer GBers....;......maybe that way of thinking insulated me from some of the cult control. I went along with it because I knew nothing else. I was raised in the WTS from age 4 or 5 until I walked away at age 40+. The hardest part was confirming in my mind that I would never see my deceased father again, because resurrection and paradise were truly stories not truth.
I was a regular pioneer, elder, MTS graduate. I had additional responsibilities outside of the congregation..some that I held for a long time...(even when I was deleted as a MS or was waiting to be reappointed as an elder.....I was still doing those responsibilities, but under the guise of someone else being the overseer for that time so that procedure was followed.) Though never a regular at bethel (except for a couple of temp stints that opened my eyes to that
"spritual paradise""den of wolves,") because of my additional responsibilities, I was exposed on a regular basis to the Bethel Heavy Hitters that came through regularly...some I liked, others I despised.So..on one hand, many of the rank and file in the congregations...,mostly away from my "home" congos......considered me "spiritually mature"..... on the other hand, those that I refused to kowtow to thought that I was a spiritual rebel.... who do you think was right?
I sincerely believe that most of the elderly loved and respected me..because I loved them without condition and took time to listen to them. (One called me out of the blue last night and we talked for an hour...I advised her not to rake fire to her bosom by telling anyone she had talked to me...she agreed.)
However, those males that were my age peers (and their fathers that were 20 years older, esp elders) felt threatened by me, even before I attended MTS. Thus the attacks on my character. Somehow they thought that my attending MTS threatened their positions.... how wrong they were...as long as they played golf with the CO (or as I found out last night, took the CO and his wife on a Hawaiian vacation), they had nothing to worry about...
Ironically, it was the 8 weeks of MTS that woke me up to the pack of lies. Especially the unit on Chronology. I had studied it extensively on my own prior to MTS.....often without WT publications (oh, the horror).... and what I learned in MTS did not match my secular research....something I have confirmed since walking away completely.
So..... I guess it depends on point of view?
long answer.....not surprising, eh?
Snakes ()