MY DAD WANTS TO STUDY WITH THE KIDS (page 4)

primitivegenius

im out, so my advice comes from that place. the place where jw family KNOW where i stand pretty much. now i tried to make no waves and i even moved an hour away........... then out of state to fade into the night. thing is when i called them before and they were happy to talk to me, they just assumed that i was inactive and so they tried to drown me in their jw bulls***. when they asked the real questions.......... i tried to change the subject....... when they insisted i gave them both barrels. so they might not know that im firmly convinced that their religion is in fact a CULT, but they do know that there is no way in hell i will ever go back for any circumstances. i did call it false religion lol.

thats a place that you may come to in your life in dealing with jw's. just so you know before i hated talking to them because of all the jw bs they kept going back to........... oh sister so and so asked about you, do you remember brother so in sos son.......... well he did this and is an elder ect ect......... we drove half way to your house to work on an assembly hall.......... then drove home....... oh sorry we cant afford to come visit you....... yeah next week were going back to work the weekend at that assembly hall again.............. and the week after next......... ok for the next 5 or 6 weekends.

now its different. i will admit they NEVER call me unless someones haveing surgery but at least when they do talk to me they usually dont spout their bull........... but then again when they do i tell them how everyone in CHURCH LOVES my boy. and i actually like it better this way cause no bs is a good thing. no more pretending, no more smothering, i tell it straight up.

now........... like the bible says...... would you give your son a serpent and call it bread? or fix them a sandwich with just a little rat poison in it......... not enough to harm them just a taste.......... HELL NO you wouldnt. even if it was a little amount that wouldnt affect them much.......... poison is poison. my advice is to tell him that you already study the bible with them. wouldnt be a bad thing to actually do it if your not already. get some secular publications to help and not allow anything from that cult to enter into it.

personally id have to say over my cold dead body will my son EVER have that sh** said anywhere around him. if my dad were to pass (god forbid) and they had the service at a kingdom hall................. i would apply the reverse strategy back at them. i would go to the graveside and not attend the bulls*** kingdom HELL service. i wont bring myself into the devils house lol.

just a personal opinion from someone who loves his son more than life itself

sass_my_frass

Don't be afraid of disfellowshipping. It sure is weird and shocking but if you spend more time away from the JW junk by the time it happens you'll have built a safety network around yourself so you'll be able to recover quickly. (And do that; be a good friend with non-witnesses, you're going to need them.)

In any case, I don't know what you're thinking putting your kids in the way of that bullet anyway. Your resposibility is to them and their malleable little minds. You should be protecting them, not yourself.

V

I'm "in" as well and have this simple advice: stake your claim as the "spiritual head" of the family and that you will be responsible for your children's education.

StAnn

"Dig a hole..Deep enough to bury a body..Show it to him......Tell him not to mess with your kids!..LOL!!........ Coffin ........................."

I'm with Outlaw on this. Just the idea of grandpa "studying" with the kids is haunting me. Why isn't he offering to take them fishing or something normal? Can't you see how messed up he is? Do you really want anyone teaching these lies to your kids?

StAnn

exjdub

thebigdebate,

You mentioned the following points:

I agree that I am the parent and that I need to do what is best for my kids.

I also agree that I think that my dad is testing me to see if I am in or out. I think that if he know for sure that I am out, that he would rally the other elders to get to the bottom of it and I would be df'd.

The thing that makes me the most mad about JW's is the dfing. My brother is df'd and I see how it affects him and I dont want to be df'd. But on the other side, I feel like I should stand up and speak my feeling and if my family cant accept that then that is it I guess.

I also agree with the point that my dad is going to be talking about how my wife and I will be destroyed very soon - I agree that that is wrong to try to convince the kids that their parents are bad people.

You started your topic off by asking if you should let your father study with the kids, but then it shifted to how that decision will affect you. It is understandable that you would be conflicted and worried about being DF'd, however our responsibility to our children is paramount, regardless of the outcome for us as parents.

Although it sometimes causes us pain to do the right thing it is never wrong to protect our children at our expense. What parent (at least a normal loving parent) would not put their life in danger by running in front of a car to push their child out of harms way? I see your situation in a similar way. To protect your children you may decide to sacrifice your own feelings, fears, and perhaps your standing with the Org. As difficult as that may be, if that is what will protect them from something that you have decided is harmful that is what you must do regardless of the outcome to you. Please don't let fear guide your decision. That being said, I hope you are able to find a way to extricate yourself from the situation without causing yourself harm and I think there has been some good advice from others that will help you to do so.

By the way, you didn't mention the ages of your children, but please keep in mind that if you think that your children would never "fall for this cult" you may be underestimating the power of family pressure, "love", and the constant mind screwing that will go on. Children often bear the burden of not wanting to dissapoint and it will be awful difficult for them to be placed in a spot where they will not want to dissapoint their grandpa, while at the same time being indoctrinated with the view that their parents will lose their lives in the Great Tribulation. We know it's hogwash, but they are impressionable and will have trouble filtering that through their world. Peace.

exjdub

megawatt

^ Great post exjdub. Absolutely, a loving family member would put themselves in harm's way in order to protect those closest to them.

Wordly Andre

I don't have kids yet, wife and I are working on that, but that's a whole other story, anyway I told her that when we have kids, I want it written in my will that my kids will not end up with my JW family if something were to ever happen to me, and I would never allow my kids to step foot into kingdump hall. Now I know some might say that let them make up their own minds Fu*k that I know what I went through I'm not putting my kids through that. Wife and I already decided our kids will be raised Catholic, and my JW family will keep their mits off them.

WuzLovesDubs

Not only your parents but ANY JW that wants to study with your kids...DONT LET THEM. Dont let them tag along with Sister so and so to the Memorial or just go to the DRAMA with Brother Whatshisname at the District Assembly. I found out how the "friends" were badmouthing me to my kids and telling them mommy was going to be destroyed by Jehovah and that was it. I wrote a SCATHING letter to the elder and his wife who were taking my kids to meetings when they went there to "visit" and said it is DONE and if they ever took my kids to another meeting or talked about me to them or allowed ANYONE ELSE to talk negatively about their mother to them...they would categorically NEVER see my kids again until the kids were adults and could make that decision to see them themselves. And then I would contact my ATTORNEY.

They backed off.

LDH

If your kids are above the age of ten, I completely disagree. Let them go. If you have done a good job as a parent they will be able to see bullshit from a mile away.

My children are welcome to go to any church they want to go to.

I'm completely comfortable in the knowledge that I've taught my children cultthink vs. reality.

WuzLovesDubs

So what did you end up telling daddy dearest?

MY DAD WANTS TO STUDY WITH THE KIDS

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