Hey Sweetpea!!!!
It certainly did! And I saved your sentimental note to me, btw. I've shared it with the guys who work for me - and they like your sentiments too.
I'm sorry for not thanking you privately, busy week. But it was fun...
waiting
Serious Question
by Prisca 66 Replies latest social relationships
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yeldell2
Perhaps I did not read your responses correctly, but are you saying
that at 17, you were in the truth and married someone in the truth as
well, and that the relationship did now work? Dating is viewed in
the big congregation seriously and with the intent of marriage only.
This can, indeed, put a lot of pressure on the brother and sister in-
volved.It does seem that to marry someone in the truth would be the ideal
situation, only, that in itself, does not mean you and that person
will be sexually compatible. That is something, I feel, the two persons can "work through," with both of them being virgins before
marriage, to me, is the only way they will be able to learn and find
satisfaction in one another.Many times, the friends will marry outside of the truth, which is
something we are not admonished to do. Some relationships work and
some do not. These days, I just feel that whatever one does, be
safe mentally and physically health-wise before venturing into such
a situation. The "world" has its own standards and it is just not
Jehovah's way. And, no matter what happens, please try to continue to
serve Jehovah to the best of your ability. If a prospective mate,
is truly kind and loving, whether in the truth or not, he/she will
respect not having relations before being married. May Jehovah remain with us, as we all endeavor to serve him to the best of our
ability.Sincerely,
Patricia
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waiting
Hello Yeldell2,
Nice to meet you. I've read your post on your physical/mental problems - I'm sorry that your life is under such strain now. Glad you decided to join in here a tad. Perhaps joining in will give you something to discuss, laugh, or fuss, about?
Dating is viewed in the big congregation seriously and with the intent of marriage only
I agree that your quote is what the Watchtower articles say, and that many brothers and sisters actually take this seriously. Many do not, however. As I'm sure you're aware, Watchtower articles also are published admonishing us to be careful with the hearts of each other, as dating just to be with another person is practiced.
It does seem that to marry someone in the truth would be the ideal situation, only, that in itself, does not mean you and that person will be sexually compatible. That is something, I feel, the two persons can "work through," with both of them being virgins before marriage, to me, is the only way they will be able to learn and find satisfaction in one another.
That is a fine, personal, opinion to express. However, the divorce rate within the congregation - for whatever reasons (and we certainly don't know them all) - are about the same as society at large. Even the Watchtower Society has commented on this, with their various opinions as to the reasons.
These days, I just feel that whatever one does, be safe mentally and physically health-wise before venturing into such a situation.
I agree with you fully. Our mental and physical health, along with our emotional health is a primary concern - along with our mate's health.
If a prospective mate, is truly kind and loving, whether in the truth or not, he/she will respect not having relations before being married.
It seems some of our young ones, even older brothers and sisters marry in haste so that they won't be overcome with sexual urges and have intercourse before marriage. The old saying "marry in haste, repent in leisure" comes to mind, don't you agree?
I would think that is part of the problem. We sometimes don't know who we're marrying - but we're so afraid that we'll fall into sin and be disfellowshipped from our families and friends, our reputations ruined, so we hurriedly marry. By the way, sometimes it's not the "prospective mate" who has the problem of waiting for sex until after the marriage vows. Some people are wise, or not wise, enough to realize it's themselves who can't find the self control. Part of human nature.
waiting
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RedhorseWoman
Unfortunately, the pressure to marry within the congregation is quite intense. I've seen so many marry a "brother in the truth" thinking that that alone is the key to a good marriage. We had been taught that marrying in the Lord gave you such a big benefit over people in the world getting married.
Unfortunately, most of those couples have gotten divorced.
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BlueLight
some of the faults about sex's view are about a misinterpretation of biblical guidelines about morality....
God commands us to avoid homosexuality, fornication as well obscene jokes and stupid talking. Sex is a way to show love and to procreate but it's sacred for the reason that if bad used can only harm.
but a clear speaking of sex things as intended as discussion is not obscene talking sometimes has been viewed like obscene talking by some....
we have to progress...
Flaminio Ranzato,
Italy -
yeldell2
Jedi:
Thank you for responding to my reply. I am kind of surprised you
agree. I am older and am speaking just from being in the truth for
14 years of what I have seen, heard and how sometimes the friends try
to play "matchmaker," as that has happened to me twice. As yet, I am
unmarried. I was able to gracefully avoid the situation, because I
was not raised in the truth, had been in the world, etc. and I knew
what my particular needs were. That helps!! Many of the younger
brothers and sisters that marry in the truth, do not know and what you
have said if quite true. They are unable to understand sexual feelings at such a young age. I've seen older brothers marry young
sisters - while the elders just let it happen.I recently received a marriage proposal from an old boyfriend. Yes
he was my FIRE!! years ago, but now, although I still have feelings
for him, he has lead a very bad life. He is now baptist, which is his
way of finding solace from his wrongdoings. Yet, I know deep down he
is not for me. It is a crucial time in the life of me and my kids and
for me to align myself with a worldly man would not be in their best
interests. Besides I'm afraid to do so, because I know we really
would not get along. He's been through a lot, but I do not fool
myself into thinking that sex would make it all right. I know we are
too different. Jehovah has blessed me. I have a more than substantial income and have been off work for some time. My kids work
and are in high school. My oldest son keeps in touch, though he has
not served Jehovah for many years. He now has a 5 year old daughter,
at age 27. I love him dearly, yet, he is baptized and has strayed
from righteousness, I welcome him with open arms, because he tells me
all the time that the world is a mess.If it were just me, I would probably be thinking seriously about the
proposal, but my children keep me "grounded." It is one thing to hurt
yourself, but something entirely different to hurt someone else. That
may be something that they will never understand, but more importantly, it is something that would tear me apart.Jehovah to the end!!!
Sincerely,
Patricia
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and Email Address was used. Not sure
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But can be contacted there to retrieve
valued information. Please help!! -
mgm
hello dear friends
I didn't write for long time. Just didn't have time.
The Brothers here in Switzerland are usualy not so strict about dating. Only the members of the italian meeting were very strict. When we visited italian friends as teenager, we were not even alloved to sit next to each other, boy one sofa and girls the other one...:-)When I was 18 years old, we got visitors during the district convention staying at our house. I felt in love immediately with the 21 year old sister. Her brother was sleeping in my room. I went to her bed in our guest room as soon as her brother slept in my room. I spent three very exciting nights with her, and we were very tired during the convention...
Later, I went for some months to California to study English. In order to save money, I was invited to stay together with three sisters in the same appartement. After some weeks, the local elders recommended to change my accomadation, so I moved to a brother.
to be continued....
Now, I'm married for some years and we have a very nice sexual live since beginning. We do any position, any practice, witch both enjoy.
As you can see, I never could think black and white in this matter...even when I was a witness...
Regards
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The Dredger
Dredged!
3 of Prisca's opening 4 posts went into the 'Dating, Relationships & Sex' forum. You mucky little pup Prisc', don't ever change!
I think this thread also shows off RedHorse Woman at her early best.....think I'll have a good delve into Red's archives and see what I can dredge up.
The ladies definately had the upper hand way back then . . . . .
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