TEN REASONS WHY I NEVER WASH
My mother made me wash as a child.
The soap makers only want my money.
There are so many different kinds of soap, I could never decide which one was right.
I used to wash, but it got boring, so I quit.
I do wash on special days like Easter and Christmas.
I work hard all week and am too tired to take a bath on the weekend.
People who wash are hypocrites. They think they are cleaner than other people.
I get along very well without washing.
Hardly any friends I have, wash.
I'm still young. When I get older and dirtier I may wash."
They have all sorts of new services today.
Now they've got a dial-a-prayer service for atheists.
You call a number and nobody answers.
Pity the poor atheist who feels grateful but has no one to thank.
Atheists are really on the spot; they have to sing "Hmmmmmmmmmm bless America."