I wrote this letter several months ago but didn't feel strong enough to deal with the JW flack it might cause. Now I'm feeling better and ready to let the professionals around me know just how insidious the JW teachings can be on susceptable young minds. The forst 6 letters will go out to the High Schools in my area. I've included a covering letter which I won't bother copying here, but I hope you will read through the rest and let me know what you think.
The first teaching of Jehovah’s Witnesses I wish to bring to your attention is one concerning friendships. Forming close friendships with those outside the Witness network is actively frowned upon and parents are instructed to discourage any close bonds with those outside the faith. Below is a quote from a recent Awake magazine in an article particularly directed to young people.
“Perhaps you feel that you have found someone like that at school, one of your classmates with whom you have hit it off well. You share some similar interests and enjoy conversing together. True, the person may not be a fellow believer; yet, from your standpoint, he or she does not seem to fit the category of ‘bad association’ either. (1 Corinthians 15:33) Admittedly, some youths who do not share your Bible beliefs adhere to decent principles. (Romans 2:14, 15) But does that mean that you should become close friends with them?..........
To be a close friend to someone, you must share that one’s values and goals. That simply is not possible with a person who does not adhere to your Scriptural beliefs and standards. Becoming unevenly yoked with an unbelieving classmate will likely either induce you to get involved in wrong practices or spoil your useful habits.” Awake, April 2006 page 19 published by the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society.
The term “bad association” is sometimes rephrased “worldly associates” and is mainly used in a negative context.
In my experience, this directive puts a great deal of pressure on young Witness children especially in the teen years where fitting in to the school social groups is very important to them. Our second eldest son whilst attending High School found this particularly difficult to bear. As “good” Witness parents are expected to do, we actively discouraged his forming friendships outside witness circles as instructed by the Watchtower Society. The resultant pressure to comply caused our son to develop an extremely low self esteem which resulted in a deep depression requiring medication. He also self harmed regularly.
I give this example, not as a criticism of Witness beliefs and practices but to inform you of the external pressures many Witness teens will be under from zealous parents who belong to this high-control religious group. I feel it is important for you as an educator and carer of these children to be aware of this. Of course not all Witness teens will react to this pressure in this way, and some Witness parents will not be as strict in applying the directives, but those youths who are particularly sensitive and conscientious are more likely to react badly to the intense pressure placed upon them by such a tight-knit group.
Another teaching that could adversely affect baptized young Witnesses in your charge is what will happen to those that officially leave or are disfellowshiped (excommunicated) from Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Active Witnesses are instructed to completely shun the dissident one resulting in a great deal of hurt and pain.
If the youngster is a baptized Witness and at a later date officially decides not to continue as such and leaves (termed, disassociated or disfellowshipped), these ones are, as far as is practical, ignored and avoided by all those witness friends they grew up with. This can be devastating to a teen especially as the youngster was only ever encouraged to have Witness friends in the first place.
In my experience this form of psychological, emotional bullying and its devastating effects cannot be overemphasised here. Suicide is a real possibility.
Here is a quote from a recent Watchtower publication advocating this view.
“Regarding everyone that "does not remain in the teaching of the
Christ," we read: "Never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him. For he that says a greeting to him is a sharer in his wicked works." (2 John 9-11) We do not have spiritual or social fellowship with disfellowshipped ones. The Watchtower of
September 15, 1981, page 25, stated: "A simple 'Hello' to someone can be the first
step that develops into a conversation and maybe even a friendship. Would we want
to take that first step with a disfellowshiped person?......................Bible principles on this subject apply equally to those who disassociate themselves from the congregation.
"Keep Yourselves in God’s Love” book. Pg 133 appendix subjects “How to treat a disfellowshipped person” Published by the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society 2008.
This is what happened to my eldest son whilst in his late teens. The Witness friends he grew up with, some of which he attended school with, now pass him in the street as if he’s a stranger. The emotional turmoil at that time caused him to do poorly in his A levels and the resultant pain has caused him to seek counselling and medication. He no longer chooses to live in our locality.
Again may I stress that I relate this experience not to denigrate Witness beliefs or practices as we are all entitled to believe as we wish, but to inform you of the possible consequences to the mental health of some of the young people in your care if they are baptized but choose not to stay as Witnesses. The cost of leaving is very high. Relevant information on this matter produced by an active member of JW’s can be viewed at http://www.freeminds.org/v/WTV080515ChildBaptism.html
Also affecting this age group is the constant changing advice from The Watchtower Society regarding further education. Generally most further education options, especially university are given a negative spin by the Watchtower. Zealous parents are encouraged to steer their youngsters either into the full-time preaching work or Bethel service and may discourage their children to cease pursuing a university course. (Bethel is the London HQ of the Watchtower Society)
Here is a quote stating the latest directive from the Watchtower Society.
The trend today is for secondary schools or high schools to groom their students for higher education. To this end, most high schools focus on academic subjects that enable the students to score well in university entrance examinations rather than on courses that will equip the students for the workplace. High school students today are under tremendous pressure from teachers, counsellors, and fellow students to aim for enrolment in the best universities, where they will hopefully earn the degrees that can open for them doors to promising and well-paying jobs.
What, then, are Christian parents to do? Of course, they want their children to do well in school and learn the necessary skills for maintaining themselves in the days ahead. (Proverbs 22:29) But should they simply let their children be swept along by the spirit of competition for material advancement and success? What sort of goals do they put before their children, either by word or by personal example?............
University and college campuses are notorious for bad behaviour—drug and alcohol abuse, immorality, cheating, hazing, and the list goes on. Consider alcohol abuse. Reporting on binge drinking, that is, drinking for the sole purpose of getting drunk, New Scientist magazine says: “About 44 per cent of [university students in the United States] binge at least once in a typical two-week period.” The same problem is common among young people in Australia, Britain, Russia, and elsewhere. When it comes to sexual immorality, the talk among students today is about “hooking up,” which according to a Newsweek report “describes one-time sexual encounters—anything from kissing to intercourse—between acquaintances who’ve no plans to even talk afterward.” Studies show that from 60 to 80 percent of students engage in this kind of activity. “If you’re a normal college student,” says one researcher, “you do it.”—1 Corinthians 5:11; 6:9, 10.
12 In addition to the bad environment, there is the pressure of schoolwork and examinations. Naturally, students need to study and do their homework to pass the exams. Some may also need to hold at least a part-time job while going to school. All of this takes a great deal of their time and energy. What, then, will be left for spiritual activities? …………..
If you are a young person, ask yourself: ‘Am I putting forth my best effort to “accomplish my ministry,” to make myself a qualified minister of God’s Word? What are my plans for pursuing my ministry “fully”? Have I considered taking up full-time service as a career?’……..
A personal example in the article concludes;………
“Whenever we were choosing subjects at school or making decisions that would affect our future, they [the parents] always encouraged us to make a choice that would give us the best opportunity to find part-time work and pioneer*.” Rather than choose academic subjects that are geared toward a university education, parents and children need to consider courses that are useful in pursuing a theocratic career.”
Oct 1 st 2005 WT pg 31, published by the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society.
*Pioneer – a full time door to door preacher.
Again I offer this information hoping that it will help you understand the external pressures that are passed on to Witness youths from zealous parents eager to follow the directives from “God’s Organization”. A title the Watchtower Society likes to use for itself. These pressures are very real and intense which can cause an immense amount of anxiety in a young person torn between pleasing his parents, the peer pressure from within the congregation of Witnesses and his own personal goals and desires.
Finally a particular teaching that also may adversely affect the mental health of young and older Witness children alike is the very firm belief that if they leave JW’s, then they or their loved ones will die a horrible death at Armageddon. For a younger child, such a teaching can result in abject fear, worry and nightmares particularly when one parent or a sibling isn’t a Witness.
Below is a selection of quotes from Watchtower publications espousing this view.
“ " Only Jehovah's Witnesses, those of the anointed remnant and the "great crowd," as a united organization under the protection of the Supreme Organizer, have any Scriptural hope of surviving the impending end of this doomed system dominated by Satan the Devil." Watchtower 1989 Sep. 1 p.19
“Annihilation awaits all who will not listen and who thereby set themselves against rule by God's Kingdom ." Watchtower 2001 Feb. 15 p. 14
What will happen to young children at Armageddon? The Bible does not directly answer that question, and we are not the judges. However, the Bible does show that God views the young children of true Christians as "holy." (1 Cor. 7:14) It also reveals that in times past when God destroyed the wicked he likewise destroyed their little ones ." Reasoning from the Scriptures pp.47-48
To clarify, “True Christians” in all Watchtower publications is a term describing only Jehovah’s Witnesses. Likewise “the wicked” in this context refer to all non-JehovahsWitnesses.
My youngest son aged 9 has recently emerged from a period of deep stress and anxiety partly caused by this teaching after his father stopped being a Witness. In his young mind, he was very fearful that Jehovah God would destroy daddy any day now because he didn’t come to the meetings anymore.
After I left the Witnesses, a complete shunning was also conducted against my youngest son and I by other Witness parents at the primary school gates, parents and friends that my family had known for many years and had known and cared for my son since he was a baby. Such behaviour by people we loved was devastating to both of us and there were many times when the shunning was hard to bear.
The resultant stress caused him to behave extremely erratically in class throughout his year 3 tenure. His temper was very volatile and often accompanied by regular head banging on desks or walls in frustration. He would retreat to make-believe worlds and concentrated on these to an obsessional degree, making it difficult for him to focus on class work. He hated going to school and it would be difficult to persuade him to attend. His sleeping became very poor and was accompanied by a series of involuntary body tics and fast breathing patterns typical of a child with deep anxiety. His appetite decreased markedly and consequently his weight dropped.
His class teacher and the head teacher were extremely worried. His teacher was also the school SENCO. As many of his symptoms seem to point to Autistic Spectrum Disorder, she rightly asked for and assisted in obtaining a referral to Oak House and CAMHS.
The initial assessment concluded that he was a child with ASD, auditory memory and semantic-pragmatic problems as well as high anxiety. However as time passed and support was given in class and a new way to avoid those shunning us was implemented, his anxiety lessened and his behaviour in class and at home became more stable.
The final meeting with the child healthcare professionals at Oak House decided that my son wasn’t ASD after all but much of his previous behavioural problems were indeed anxiety based. I firmly believe a significant portion of this anxiety was caused by the total shunning we both experienced at the school gates every morning and afternoon by the pleasant, thoughtful Witnesses we thought were our friends.
Whilst I appreciate that all the personal examples I’ve related are unusual and not every witness child or parent will have the misfortune of our experience. However I know these circumstances are far from unique and are repeated with varying degrees of severity throughout the country and the world.
As far as I am aware, an official study has not been conducted on the affects of these teachings on children of Jehovah’s Witnesses, but various studies have been conducted on adults. In general, the results conclude that there were higher incidents of mental health issues amongst JW adults in proportion to the general population. A summary of these studies and accompanying comments can be found at http://www.seanet.com/~raines/mental.html
Much information can also be accessed at www.watchtowercomments.com and http://www.freeminds.org/psych/kidphob.htm Please take the time to access this information as it is well-balanced and accurate.
My hope is that the information and examples therein will prove to be an aid in helping to understand the mindset of Jehovah’s Witnesses and just some of the pressures that are brought to bear on their young children. If you try to question a Witness youth or parent about the pressures brought by these teachings, they are likely to be strenuously denied, as all Witnesses are trained to be extremely loyal to the Watchtower Society. For in the mind of a Witness, to be critical of the Watchtower Society is tantamount to being critical of God himself; for after all, this is “God’s Organization” to a Witness.
I hope this information will aid you to be more aware of the possible causes of stress and anxiety in children of Witnesses and thereby assisting in the support and understanding you can offer.
Yours Sincerely
It may seem long here but once its printed up its down to 2.5 pages.