My aunt got the "Truth" first. She has a very very very strong personality. She got my mother, grandmother and aunt into it. They were Catholics and they learned God's name as "Jehovah" and that there was no such thing as hellfire. They accepted things mostly because the Bible was opened up to them and they loved learning things Catholicism wouldn't reveal.
For those that were raised in the Truth, why did YOUR PARENTS become JW's?
by BonaFide 33 Replies latest jw friends
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Scarred for life
It was 1952. My mother was 20. She had sisters age 17 and 14 and 22 all still single and living at home. Another sister , age 26, with a very strong independent personality had moved away and lived out of state. Yet another sister was 28, married, with 5 children lived out on a very small farm.
This family had been raised as children of a tenant farmer in rural South Carolina. They had never had much money but the depression made things worse. And even after there was economic recovery the life of a small tenant farmer continued to deteriorate and it was increasingly impossible to make a living.
My mother's father always had issues. Binge drinking, depression(he was almost certainly bipolar) anger management issues, physical abuse of the children(at least some of them) and I believe very strongly that my mother and probably 1 or 2 other sisters were sexually abused. I have no proof of the sexual abuse but I will go to my grave believeing this.
In 1941-42, my mother's older brother was drafted into the military to serve in WWII. This, of course, was a blow to their father because he only had 2 sons out of 8 children that helped him on the farm. Aubrey was eventually killed at Iwo Jima. Their father never recovered from this tragedy and just spiraled further and further downward into mental illness. He became unable to function in working the farm at all. I also believe that this is when the sexual abuse either began or became much worse. He became more and more paranoid until he was completely psychotic and was making very real threats of killing the whole family with his shotgun. He accused all the girls still living at home of being prostitutes and would roam around the outside of the house at night with his shotgun looking for their "men". The girls living at home were 15, 13, 10 and 7 at the time their brother died and when their father descended into madness.
Their financial situation deteriorated to the point that their mother on at least one occasion took the youngest child to a neighbor's house who was "better off" than them and made her go through a window into the kitchen to steal food because they had absolutely nothing to eat.
The mental deterioration of their father continued until 1948 when their mother rode a bus into town.( They did not own a car). She got a doctor and the sheriff to help her get my grandfather "committed" to the South Carolina State Mental Hospital. This was 1948. (Anybody seen ONe Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest?)
There was one brother still alive. He did not have to join the military. He got married at 19. He married a 14 year old. In 1948 they already had 1 child. Another two came along later. The family now expected the brother to work the farm and support them. They had no other alternative. Well, the brother was married and producing babies but he also considered himself a 19 year old that wanted to have fun. So every night he was out drinking and carousing with the boys leaving his very young wife at home with 3 babies. He also was not working the farm.
By the time 1952 came around his wife had left without the children. Basically she was never to be seen again.
So this left my grandmother with 4 girls still at home, the brother moved back in with his 3 young children, and the oldest daughter lived close by with her husband and 5 young children. The brother was still only interested in partying and drowning out his pain for his lost brother and father.
In 1952, the oldest daughter that was still at home became pregnant from a very brief fling with a married man. (She was the most unattractive of any of the girls and had never had the attention of a man). As most of you know an unmarried pregnant woman in 1952 was a horrible, horrible shame to her family.
The 2nd oldest sister who was very independent and with a strong personality came back home out of necessity to take over the family which was now basically destitute and emotionally shredded. They had no one to turn to. They had been members of a little country Baptist church but really they got no support from them-poverty, mental illness, illegitimate children. They were basically outcasts.
Well, if you're still with me, you can guess what happened next. Knock, knock knock. A JW woman knocked on the door of the oldest sister's little shack. There she was with her 5 little children while her husband was out plowing fields. She had no close neighbors. No car. The JW woman offered to have a Bible study with her and my aunt happily accepted.
Very shortly, my grandmother and her whole houseful of people-5 daughters and 3 grandchildren that belonged to the brother were all studying the Bible with the JWs.
The pregnant sister was sent to Florida with the names of JWs down there that she lived with and eventually had her baby.
Amongst all this my mother was now 20, had graduated high school a few years before and had become a secretary at a local Textile plant. She met and began dating my father. He also started studying with the JWs.
I don't have a good handle on why my father fell for this crap except that he was very much in love with my mother. And her family was very much in love with him-good looking, intelligent, well-educated, and had a good job and a gentleman. The JWs loved him too. And I think he got the MEGA LOVE BOMBING treatment. And, yes, I think he would have fallen for that.
Thus began the saga of my parents and how they became JWs. This board has really helped me to put this all together in my mind. And it has helped me to understand how this happened.
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steve2
My mother's parents converted to Bible Students in the 1920s and my father's mother started studying with the witnesses in the 1940s when my father was a teenager. In both cases, they followed on from a parent or parents.
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restrangled
My Maternal grandmother was raised a 7th day Adventist, but hated the religion...some one came to her door with literature from Russel...She was hooked.
Her oldest son was a teenager and blew it off, but all other children took to it, going to jail, serving in bethal, of the anointed etc.
My Fathers mother, didn't find the witnesses until he was in his teens. My dad took to it because he had never had a Father, and the congregation took him under their wing. He met my mom, because he became friends with one of my mom's brothers.....thats how they met.
Dad left in his 50's after being an elder for many years.....ya kow the 1975 debacle, renegade kids....then the internet happened and he was on some site ....I still don't have a clue to, till this day, but he printed out the letter to Hitler etc. He died 10 years ago at the age of 64 a total "Apostate" I know he was a member somewhere to an xJW site, but don't have a clue. If he ever contributed to one of these sites I would be beyond happy to read it.
And....mom still pioneers at age 75.
r.
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BonaFide
Scarred for Life, what a story!
It's amazing how many of us were in the truth because our parents or grandparents were in a tough situation or were isolated from others. The experiences that are in the publications make it seem as if all those coming in were searching for the truth, and Jehovah sent the Witnesses to their door.
BF
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Scarred for life
Yes, bonafide, I completely agree.
My grandmother died a believer.
3 of her daughters are still believing JWs
The oldest sister that was originally called on died about 6 years ago a very loyal and devout believer.
Of the 3 grandchildren that originally studied with my grandmother, one is a blind believer. She and her husband have spent ALL of their retirement money, lost the home that they owned because they believed that Armageddon was imminent. They are in their early 60s and are working at menial jobs to pay the rent and put a little food on table while they wait for Armageddon.
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serendipity
My mother's family was Lutheran, but mom believed that Armageddon would happen in 2000 and that she would "get holy" in 1990. Then my aunt started a Bible Study, told mom Armageddon was coming in 1975 and that lit a fire under her. She studied and got baptized in 1973.
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flipper
My mom and dad came into the witnesses ( what I call the alleged " truth " ) back in 1951. My dad tried to get his Presbyterian minister to meet with the JW minister who was calling on him to discuss the differences in the religions. His Presbyterian minister refused to meet with the JW minister calling on my dad. So- My dad felt that if his minister did not want to meet with the Witnesses - there must be something he needed to learn about the Witnesses. Strange reasoning in my opinion. Instead of thinking his Presbyterian minister was being cautious NOT o talk to a cult member- my dad's interest was piqued because he thought the church was hiding from him what the Witnesses wanted to tell him. So the rest is history- my dad has been an elder since his late 20's and since 1954 . Crazy. I came along being born in 1959- I didn't have a snowballs chance of not being raised in it. The table had been set. At least I got out at age 44 finally in 2003
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BonaFide
Nice illustration Flipper. "The table had been set" and us little kids were called to eat dinner. There is nothing else on the table except JW food, so as kids, what are we supposed to do?
We ate it all.
BF
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daniel-p
Interesting thread. When I think about it, my parents present two of the classic examples of how people get sucked into the JW religion:
My mother's first husband died tragically after they were married only two years (fell off a building as a construction worker). The witnesses were coming around during the same time, and once that happened she just threw herself into the faith. She was young and incredibly vulnerable from the pain and loss. In fact, one of the stories she will tell is about the night after her husband died and she was crying herself to sleep: in the middle of the night she heard his voice calling her by her name. Since she had just been introduced to some of the basic JW teachings, she interpreted this as being the demons trying to get to her when she was weakest. This, of course, merely reinforced her belief in Jehovah and the WTS.
My father was involved in drinking and drugs, and had a lot of issues with his dad abandoning him when he was a kid. The JWs came around and he attached himself to a father figure who started to study with him. He kept screwing up (drinking, women, etc.), but this JW father figure kept him in line and provided him some sort of discipline he needed. He got baptized, and soon thereafter married another sister. The marriage didn't last the honeymoon. A while later, he married my mother. And that was that.
When I look back on it, it's really rather pathetic. Two people struggling with life and very weak, taken advantage of by people who meant well, but it was really just that discipline, structure, and social support that they needed.