by OUTLAW 35 Replies latest jw friends
Have you ever had enough?
Enough of all the shit in life.
And..Wanted to just end it?
Check out and not come back?
Fall asleep and not wake up?
Is any of this pain,
worth living through?
When the pain out wieghs
the joy in life.
Whats the point,
of going on?
...OUTLAW
yes i have...but thankfully i have a loving husband to bring me back to my senses. hes my only reason for living.
I can only speak for myself OUTLAW but when pain overwhelms my life, it's a sure bet that I have been ignoring something major that needs addressing. With out pain, I am too damn lazy to change.
The end may be in a figurative sense. The end of negative thoughts or habits, which opens up a whole new range of possibilities.
Remember, all things must pass....
yeah but its gonna end by itself anyway, why not get some more pleasurable chemical reactions
Only once. I took a knife to my chest. I held it there thinking about my brother who had died in a car accident. I was 15 he had been dead 1-1/2 years (he was 20 when he died), my parents were divorced my mother was disfellowshipped and remarried, my father was never a JW and had no feelings I ever saw. All I wanted was peace.......
Nope...... I was trained to survive Armageddon. I have lived through too much pain to give up now. But I was born an optimist, life sux but it can always get better if I choose to look for the silver lining and acknowledge somewhere in the world there is some poor bastard who would trade with me in a minute because their life sux worse then mine. Truth even if it is a small truth can set you free on many levels.
Now a nice two week rest in a place I am not known, can't be reached and is accomodated to my liking........ that is something that crosses my mind a few times a year........
So Outlaw what kinda pain are we talkin' bout?
holy guaca-moly! I didn't realize the time (darn lost myself watching online HBO!)
Good night dear Outlaw, may you sleep well, dream abundantly and wake well rested and ready for the challenges of life.
Outlaw are you OK? Are you talking about yourself?
Hopscotch
Yes, frequently.
"We live in the shadowlands. The sun is always shining somewhere else. Round a bend in the road. Over the brow of a hill..."
C.S. Lewis
When the pain out wieghs
That should be "weighs", if you're
going to write something so heavy
you should spell it correctly. ¿No?
Yes, I've been there. I will spare you the gory details; however, I will say this:
I reached that point because I could no longer ignore the truth about my situation or the people that were applying pressure for me to be who I was not.
I realized it wasn't that I wanted to end my life, I wanted that chapter in my life to end. And so, I took a great leap of faith and honestly changed my life. I decided it was my life anyway and I could not and would not live it for others. I turned the page, so to speak.
I have learned that all things must pass--sometimes you just have to nudge them along.
I am glad that I did not end my life because there have been so many happy experiences since that day I stood in my bathroom, razor in hand.
If you are facing the same fatal question, I beg of you, examine your life and do not be afraid to make non-violent changes. Love yourself and believe that you are worth living.
I am worried about you. Genuinely worried. Please stop and think about things. Dead is dead. There will be no turning back if you end your life. I enjoy you and hope you will stick around.
