I Talked to My Mom Today...

by jamiebowers 20 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  lisavegas420

  I know how you feel.

  lisa
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  ohiocowboy

  I am sorry you went through that with your Mother. I know it's not much of a consolation, but you are not alone, many of us know how you are feeling, and we share your pain. I hope you are OK.

  CJ
• 

  carla

  I'm sorry you have to go through this and for all the ex jw's who are shunned by Mom's & family. Disgraceful and heartbreaking.
• 

  Quandry

  jamie,

  You were right not to go on about the WTS. I am sure it was good just to hear her voice.

  The sad thing is, if and when she needs help in the future, they will be all too willing to tell her to ask you for it, telling her it's your obligation, not theirs, even though they encouraged her to shun you now.

  Perhaps you could use this opportunity to just send her a card, thanking her for letting you know the family information. Make it a flowery "A mother's love" type card....include a memory from your childhood, like "Remember when you used to sing to me that I was your sunshine?" or something similar. I can't guarantee that it will melt her heart completely, but it will certainly make her stop and think, at least for a few minutes....
• 

  jamiebowers

  Perhaps you could use this opportunity to just send her a card, thanking her for letting you know the family information. Make it a flowery "A mother's love" type card....include a memory from your childhood, like "Remember when you used to sing to me that I was your sunshine?" or something similar. I can't guarantee that it will melt her heart completely, but it will certainly make her stop and think, at least for a few minutes....

  Well, Quandry, the sad thing is that I was calling to let her know. She lives just a few miles from her sister who lost her husband, and I live almost 4 hours away. Yet, I was the one who got the call from relatives, not her. She doesn't have much to do with her "worldly" siblings or their families. A few years ago I tracked down all 10 of her siblings and their adult children, and in some cases, grandchildren and great grandchildren for a family reunion. I put them all on a spreadsheet, so I keep in touch with her side of the family more than she does. And no, she didn't attend her own family reunion, because a few of my df'd cousins and I attended. She rarely speaks to her two siblings who are jws, because they're not spiritual enough for her.
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  imperialspy

  hey Jamie - at least u can still talk to your mom. that is a positive. many of us dont have any family any more. take heart!
• 

  jamiebowers

  hey Jamie - at least u can still talk to your mom. that is a positive. many of us dont have any family any more. take heart!

  Well, that's not correct. In the past 21 years we've had about 3 limited conversations. Two were about family health history and this last one about a death in the family. Unless you're talking about all family members being deceased.
• 

  The-Borg

  Well, that's not correct. In the past 21 years we've had about 3 limited conversations. Two were about family health history and this last one about a death in the family. Unless you're talking about all family members being deceased.

  That is tragic, really sorry to hear that. This is why the organisation has to be destroyed or change it's ways.
• 

  ziddina

  Aw, Jamie, I'm sorry this incident has caused you so much pain. I did notice, however, that you appear to have many, many family contacts other than your mother?? Are they supportive of you? Nothing can replace a mother-child relationship [although my surrogate mother is actually MUCH NICER TO ME than my biological incubator was...], but are there any strong bonds between you and your aunts? Cousins?? Nieces and nephews??

  In a way, you've got much more than your mother does, if she shuns most of her family and you have contact with almost all of them. Talk about having a large group of family surrounding YOU!

  Hugs and kisses, dear...

  Zid
• 

  imperialspy

  Sorry Jamie, think i got the wrong end of the stick. i do feel for you now and forever - nothing is so deserving of such putrid behaviour on the part of your mom. i hope that one day she will see sense, but i fear that we will both be shunned until the end. Acceptance is the only way forward for us. trying to be happy in the skin we're in and with the positive things we do have in life keeps us going. Hang in there m8!!!