my motorcycle trip next weekend with dubs....and why it is sad.....

by oompa 42 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Robdar

  the way i am treating my son does not bother me AT ALL robdar..........geeze you have no idea how close we are........where did you get that?............post it so i dont have to go back and reread all i posted please..........oompa

  cause i have some really cool old jw friends and it is a weekend riding camping trip in the Great Smokey Mountains...........and that should be fun right?............ya.........except.....

  these cool old friends were going to let my dfd son ride with us and camp and all........but then some of their dub family wanted to come, and some other dubs who dont even know my son........and even though he was GREAT friends with some of these guys kids... who wanted to come just to camp...........well..........they would not come if my son comes...........

  you can not beleive how sad this makes me....it hurts....i dont even want to go now but i do understand these nuts and i do like my old friends......my dfd son even said to still go because he understands why his lifelong best friend (just reinstated!!!!) will not go if he goes......he seems way cooler about it than me...................

  this kind of painful conflict is going to kill me early......i wish me and my son could move far far far far far away....oompa

  this is insanity

  And your first post didn't imply that it is bothersome to you that your son is not wanted by these self-righteous buffoons? You really think your motorcyle ride with them is going to show some of them the way out of the cult? Don't you realize they are just as likely to lead you back?

  First you say you are upset. Then you say you are not.

  Do what you want. But don't tell me I'm closed minded or think in a small box because I do not support your decision.
• 

  AllTimeJeff

  Hey oompa. It isn't my choice to make, but I sense that people here know that more double standards and hypocrisy won't help any immediate problems with you and your son....

  On the other hand, I think it good to mention that we all learn from our decisions, good and bad, and that while we are in the middle of exiting, that none of us can really claim we totally did things in a manner that we wish we could have done.

  oompa, I bet you will learn a lot, and this will be a learning experience for you and your son... I hope it goes as well as you want. But I think many of the other people here have raised some good points for you to consider...

  Peace!
• 

  journey-on

  Oompa...I think you just want to go and have some fun and you are using the excuse that you are going to try and get certain ones of your friends out of the cult in the interim to make you feel better about leaving your son behind. Go have your fun. Plant a few apostate seeds. You know your son better than anybody, so trust your own gut about that part of it.
• 

  BabaYaga

  Another thing, do you think your powerful point will NOT be MADE if you choose not to ride with them? I think they will get the point loud and clear. On the other hand, if you ride with them and then try to "anti-witness", I see absolutely NOTHING coming of it (except your son feeling a bit slighted.)

  People are either going to understand that shunning is wrong or they won't.
• 

  oompa

  robdar.........i am sorry you would "rip your heart out if your dad did that to me"............thankfully that is not how my son feels......

  and journey-on........i am gladly "using the excuse" to make me feel better about leaving my son behind....but it does not work........i hate it.....i will feel bad about him not being there......but we are more than father and son now......way more.......we are part of this supersmall club of awakened dubs who get it......and apparently many here do not get that.......if you want to talk to my son or me....it can happen........just pm me....oompa

  and thanks all for your input...........it has really taught me a lot.......
• 

  betterdaze

  Hey oompa, it's great that he's turning his life around, and you're there to support him. You have to know he's not the first "rebellious youth from the Truth" and certainly not the last one (I speak from experience because I wore that label well).
  
  But even worldly people don't want to hang with guys who have a history — that's the consequences of his young life so far. The Witness angle complicates it, but it would probably happen anyway. You and he need to accept that and move forward with or without them.
  
  Success is the greatest revenge against these people. Help each other show them how it's done beyond their ugly little cult. Then let them stew in their own juices.
  
  ~Sue
• 

  oompa

  amen betterdaze!..........and both of us are on that page....if we can can have that success you speak of of, and get some friends to think for themselves.......it is all worth it..........oompa
• 

  JRK

  Is there an interlock on your motorcycle?

  Just asking.

  JRK
• 

  nelly136

  personally id wait for another ride where your son can go too,

  telling them that your son was really looking forward to the ride and is disapointed will just make them smug that their shunning has worked and they'll lap it up, especially with his dad sitting by the campfire while hes not.

  your presence at the campsite will send a clear message to them, even if your son doesnt mind you going.
• 

  nameless_one

  I agree with the others who say please don't go. I've never stood in your shoes, but I do feel pretty sure that it wouldn't even be a question for me, there's just no way. Also, if you're thinking that you can "anti-witness" to these people around the campfire, well frankly I think your very presence there will immediately deflate and negate any argument you might present about how crappy it was to exclude your son. Because if you're there too, and your son isn't, well you've essentially done the very same. Actions speak so much louder than words; if it were me, I would let my absence do the talking. Spend the weekend with your son, not in the company of people who would crap on him. That will send a strong message to all involved, including and especially your son. My two cents.