Blondie, your mother does not deserve to be called your mother, just the lady who gave birth to you. I actually fault her more than her sick husband, because as your mother she should have protected you first and foremost. That's not a mother, that's a sick, selfish woman. I am deeply sorry for what you have had to endure at the hands of those monsters. I am deeply impressed that you recognize their toxicity and have cut them out of your life.
My mother is very much indoctrinated, but she is glad to hear from me every so often. I finally am at a point in my life where it doesn't cause me great pain to think of her. I love her, but I realize she is not, nor will she ever be, a role model, or the mother I want and need her to be. I am a role model for her. It's almost like I'm the parent and she is the child. She is so incapable of thinking for herself, so fearful of opening her mind lest Satan take it over. I am sad for her, but also believe she has been this way for so long that it would kill her to realize it was all for nothing. Part of me hopes she lives out the rest of her days believing the JW's are true, so that she doesn't have to deal with the pain of all the unnatural things she has done in the name of Jehovah.
She has been downright cruel many times, not motherly at all, because she thought that is what Jehovah would want. But I'm finally at a point in my life where I don't fault her for it. I fault the men in charge of this horrible religion, who continue to mislead vulnerable people like my mother. They are bloodguilty, as far as I am concerned. They should be hoping there is no God, because that day of reckoning is not going to be pretty!
Rachel