what is it with women?

by John Doe 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    I swear, I only see women doing this. Picture it--I'm patiently waiting in line at the local sack o shit and watching the woman in front of me stack her mountain of groceries onto the conveyor belt. Now, the grocery store conveyor belts are not 100% conveyor belt--they all have 6 to 8 inches of flat space at the end of the conveyor.

    So, the woman completely fills the conveyor belt, and has more shit. The conveyor belt is stationary while the clerk completes the transaction of the customer in front of the woman. What does the woman (and nearly every danged woman) do? She stacks more shit on the stationary part of the counter. You know, the stationary part--the part that does not "convey" the groceries to the clerk. And she doesn't even get all of the shit out of her cart! Why oh why do women do this? Now, she has to move the groceries not once, but twice. Once the conveyor resumes operation, she must move the groceries onto the conveyor belt. Notwithstanding this, as often as not an item that is half on and half off of the conveyor will cause a tumble and shit will fall onto the floor or fall over.

    Why? Is she afraid that the conveyor belt will shift into high gear and move so quickly and the clerk will bag her groceries so quickly that she will not have time to place her remaining groceries onto the belt? Is she afraid of waiting the handful of seconds for more space to become available on the belt? Really, I'm cluelesss? Why do you all do this?

  • aSphereisnotaCircle
    aSphereisnotaCircle

    All it takes is a sweep of the arm from the non-conveying to the conveying part........ whats the problem?

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    It's retarded, that's what.

  • aSphereisnotaCircle
    aSphereisnotaCircle

    Actually she is counting the number of items in her cart and does not want to get interupted and forget what numbers she is on.

    Number of items X $4. = total bill

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    And it's easier to count with shit in a pile than with shit not exceeding rated capacity?

  • palmtree67
    palmtree67

    Damn, ladies! Doe is onto us!!

    Ok, JD, here's the truth: We only do it to piss you off.

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    A related shopping peeve is the little plump assed people who will sit in the front of a parking lot holding up traffic for five minutes to avoid having to march their fat asses 20 feet further to an available parking space. I don't wait on them--I drive around them, park, walk, and get inside the store before they've even moved from the middle of the lane.

  • Robdar
    Robdar
    Ok, JD, here's the truth: We only do it to piss you off.

    ~snicker~

    And it works!!!

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    One of these days I'm going to write a book about going to the store.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    "A related shopping peeve is the little plumb assed people who will sit in the front of a parking lot holding up traffic for five minutes to avoid having to march their fat asses 20 feet further to an available parking space. I don't wait on them--I drive around them, park, walk, and get inside the store before they've even moved from the middle of the lane."

    I just know you're not talking about me cuz most times when I have my little plumb ass waiting for that parking space it's so my disabled hubby will be close enough to the store to walk his little plumb ass in and reach the courtesy scooter before he falls on his face.

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