Switching congregations

by EmptyInside 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    when I was in I changed congs several times if I didn't feel comfortable, or to get away from in laws and eventually the ex

  • parakeet
    parakeet

    restrangled: I have sister in law that switched so many times she is fianlly in Mexico. Nothing to do with JW's... even they couldn't tolerate her.....shes just a real prize.....but she does wear the JW name proudly.....

    You do have more than your share of in-law trouble, restrangled. I remember when you were going through the wringer with your mother-in-law. With all respect to your husband, it sounds like he has one doozy of a family.

    Regarding the thread topic, switching KHs can be helpful if you want to avoid someone in particular. I know of an elder that switched to another KH because he couldn't stand his own mother any more.

    Of course, the best switch is from the KH to the freedom of the real world.

  • Rabbit
    Rabbit

    I switched to another hall -- almost an hour's drive from home. And like others have said -- because of a problem. After my now ex & I separated (she left), a few jw's started wondering 'why?' Slowly, thru gossip and just 'not knowing' I got disgusted. The elders ? some of them actually did try to help the situation until they got tired. There were other fish to fry.

    I moved in true hopes that 'my KH just wasn't as blessed' or something. I got tired of watching the elders proclaim '...isn't great that Jehovah's people have the divinly appointed elders to help them with any problem...', yet, began acting as if I really would have had to "Wait on Jehovah..." they were just too busy. (meetings & study ya' know)

    I had several friends at the new hall, but after a while, I began to see the same -like people with different faces and clothes...blindly following or leading each other in circles. Gossip even followed me there.

    That's when I just started skipping a few meetings here n' there and since I wasn't in their territory, it was easy to ignore me. I skipped more and more till I just stopped going altogether. I guess my records were never forwarded, because slowly time went by and I think...both congregations simply thought the other one...had me under their control. I've been gone several years now and have * never * had an elders visit despite remarrying very publically a few years later -- which should have caused my DF.

    Maybe they think I "...know where some of the bodies or buried..." or just don't care. Beats me. Moving to another hall was good for me and I think a lot of JW's leave after that, too, because then they know JW's still smell like wet .

    FadedRabbit

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    As a young man I switched from the small congo in which I was brought up, to a bigger one in a nearby town, I just felt frustrated and needed to spread my wings. That worked brilliantly.

    Family have moved for "personal reasons" ..i e they got upset at the elders. It is true that they keep moving on every few years . The scene is always the same. At first the new congo is wonderful and "so loving" . As time goes by they find out that the new associates are just human, then they upset the elders again and this congo becomes "unloving and lacking the spirit" - so they move on around the circuit. It can be done if the distances are not too great.

    The attitude of the new congo elders can vary tremendously. Most are welcoming if tolerant of them, seeing sheep to be accepted (and bums on seats) but some are less welcoming and tell them that they really ought to be supporting the home congo....

  • MissingLink
    MissingLink

    We've attended a LOT of different congregations. Not that we ever switched because of problems, just that we moved house many times. We were definitely relieved to be out of some of the worst ones.

    EmtptyInside said:

    ...And of course, the ones that go hall to hall, sometimes they turn out being the troublemakers....

    Yes, like elders who would get removed at one congregation, then move to another and be quickly re-appointed because they knew how to play the system. They would start oppressing people there until they would go too far and get removed again. Repeat, repeat, repeat. One particular elder (who's name was a swear word when I was a teenager) comes to mind. And you know about all the "brother brother's" who would move from the suburban congregations into the inner city congregations to be around "their own type". Racism is alive and well in the congregations.

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    I unofficially did that. I would switch back and forth. Sure made it harder on them when I started missing the boasting sessions altogether.

  • EmptyInside
    EmptyInside

    Missing Link, I think I know that jerk, uh, elder,he's down south now. I feel sorry for the friends down there.

  • willyloman
    willyloman

    I guess my records were never forwarded, because slowly time went by and I think...both congregations simply thought the other one...had me under their control. I've been gone several years now and have * never * had an elders visit despite remarrying very publically a few years later -- which should have caused my DF.

    What Rabbit and others are pointing out is a simple truth about the organization that you can use to your advantage when fading: The vast majority of elders just hate to follow up on problem publishers. They will use any excuse not to go see what the problem is. When someone hasn't been around for awhile and the elders are asked (usually by the visiting CO) to check on them, the first question elders ask themselves is: "Who's got their cards?"

    In other words, whichever congregation holds their FS reports has responsibility. Conversely, if you have moved and they have sent the cards on to the next KH, they're absolved and happy to be so. Therefore, with respect to "problem" publishers, the best move as an elder body is to get those cards sent someplace else, pronto.

    We once got a letter of introduction for a couple with serious "issues" and we knew they were going to be a major headache. The PO read the letter to the body and the first sentence was: "Dear Brothers, We are happy that Brother and Sister X are moving to your congregation." Since this couple's history was already well known circuit-wide, the entire elder body broke out laughing before the PO could continue reading. For years after that, the phrase was a standing joke whenever elders discussed problem pubs. Why? Because the best, and often only, solution to these "problems" was for them to move, and we hoped they would.

    Bottom line for faders: If you can, try to confuse the issue as to who is supposed to follow up on you.

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