Not invited to a JW family dinner

LoriJis

I just need to vent. My husband and I live in the same apt complex as my JW in-law family. They have family visiting from out of state and there is a big family dinner tonight - but OMG its not a Thanksgiving dinner. They are cooking and the family is all getting together but no they are not celebrating. Even my brother in law said "yea i know it sounds pagan". But here is what gets me. Because we live in the same complex it's not like we can hide the fact we havent been going to the meetings. So guess who didn't get invited....us. I think thats messed up because technically if it's a "family" dinner we should be at least invited - no? My brother in law told my husband (just cuz he happened to see us) about the dinner and said that my mother in law may not have told us because she thought we had plans. Heres the thing though, she knows we have my step kids today and knows we werent going anywhere. I told my husband the reason we werent invited is cuz we dont go to the meetings.,,,we are no longer considered worthy of spending time with the JW family.

I just think thats really messed up.

I hope all of you can enjoy a great thanksgiving dinner with those you love.

LoriJis

BTW you can't tell me most JW families take advantage of no work today and have a "family" dinner. But isn't that what Thanksgiving is all about. Dinner with family friends and sharing time together...

Just a thought....

White Dove

That is rude and "messed up." What all the JW's I've ever known do is buy a turkey "on sale," of course, then cook the whole shebang either on Thursday, Friday, or Saturday and blame it on the "sale" and "everyone had time off from work" excuses.

whataburger

I grew up in this religion, and while I strayed as a late teen and had a great mentor on how to really enjoy life, I ended up coming back in because I married a girl who was also raised in the "truth".

We stopped going to meetings a long time ago, but she still thinks it's the truth.

But what is sad are the number of "friends" we have lost because we stopped going to the meetings. We are having dinner with a couple tonight who are still hard core (even go out in service), but they don't know that we have faded because we live so far apart.

Jut drop those people who shun you, cut them out of your life and never let them back in... Not until they realize the sham and apologize.

..burg.

compound complex

Welcome, Lori, to the forum. I am sorry and relate to how you feel. My position is not unlike yours.

I realize it sounds cliched and farfetched, but this thought helps me: If you can't love the one you want, love the one you're with.

Neighbors, kind and generous neighbors, have invited me over for dinner.

Love and best wishes,

CoCo

truthseekeriam

I know how your feeling Lori. We have been inactive the last 6 months or so and this is the first Thanksgiving we are alone Usually if we don't go visit the families at least one of them will come and visit us and we have a big family dinner, this year nothing. the in laws even forgot our anniversaryy earlier this month..I think they are sending us a message if we don't go back, this is what we have to look forward too!! It really is hurtful because they know they are all we have. I mean of course we lost all our friends once we stopped going to meetings and being a JW you don't make friends outside the Org and you stay away from the "wordly" family members...they really set you up to fall hard or go crawling back, and just try to stomach all the badness going on around you (can't do it)

Saoirse

Lori, I'm so sorry that your family excluded you. The same thing happened to us with JW family who lived up the road and it was very hurtful. I will never understand the mentality behind shunning family members. At least you have your husband with you and you can be thankful for that. Enjoy your evening with him and try not to worry too much about those who weren't true friends to begin with.

TheOldHippie

Perhaps I should write a post each and every time someone doesn't invite me to dinner?

And by the way, I don't know HOW MANY TIMES my non-JW familiy has deliberately NOT invited me/us to dinner or family occasions because we are JWs.

So these things work both ways, and I really don't see that this is THE problem in the world.

dozy

Know how you feel Lori - I don't get invited to family gatherings any more. Even though it shouldn't bother me (as most of them are rather obnoxious self righteous types) it still hurts. They don't even bother to send anniversary cards or postcards. (We still do - no doubt it goes in the bin as soon as it arrives , but at least the point is made.)

What bothers me more is that they haven't the decency to explicitly say - look , Dozy , you aren't invited because you no longer go to meetings. We don't regard you or your family as good associates. I could deal with that - I know how the WTS works.

lisavegas420

How 'bout you throw a kick ass party of your own. One that is so loud that the police get called. Oh..you don't know any of those kinds of people. Invite me and I'll bring the loud crowd.

lisa

Not invited to a JW family dinner

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