And they talk about love?

by Xena 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • Francois
    Francois

    Xena, I don't think you're having a pity party. Most everyone here can relate. I know I can. And it takes awhile to really see things for what they are. It's natural to want to deny that the people whom you love and who by rights should love you back don't.

    I'd say the JWs turned your sister into what she is. My father uses the scriptures to justify his raging anti-semitism, his controlling behavior, and all the rest of his maladjusted behaviors. It's disgusting.

    I'm wondering if you have anyone in your life who does love you? Loves you for who you are? Your intelligence? Your compassion? And all those other characteristics that make you who you are.

    Do you realize that you are the only one of you in the entire Universe of Universes? That as God experiences life through the experiences of all his children in a limitless universe, that this experience that God enjoys could never be the same if not for you, since you're the only one of you there is? No copies. No substitutes? The universe would not be the same place if you weren't in it. Think of that when thinking of the JWs starts to get you down.

    It's hard to realize all this in such a confused and backwards world as the one we live in, but I do feel there will be an answer to all questions about these kinds of perplexing questions about the nature of love - even love from family.

    I do hope someone, or a lot of someones, are within your easy reach who do indeed not only love you, but know they do, and aren't afraid to admit it to themselves and to you. We all deserve to be loved. And I hope you're getting your share.

    Francois

  • Julie
    Julie

    Thank you for the very kind compliment Xena. You can always contact me if you need to, my mail is always open. I know of estrangements first hand so I can somewhat empathize with you.

    It is your sister I pity the most, what a loss she has incurred and doesn't even know it. Especially since she'll miss out on that adorable daughter of yours. I foresee her kicking herself someday.

    Regards,
    Julie

  • rhett
    rhett

    Just move on. You'll have a much better life outside the cult.
    (((((xena)))))
    Don't ever hide yourself for the sake of someone else. Its their loss that you're living your own wonderful life.

    I don't need to fight
    To prove I'm right
    I don't need to be forgiven.

  • jayhawk1
    jayhawk1

    Xena, sorry your sister is so cold hearted. That is what I have decided I hate most about the JWs. That rotten sence of "I'm better than you." A Ministerial Servant once told me Jehovah came before his wife. And even though he loved her, if she said she was no longer a JW, he would not speak to her any more. Now how cold hearted is that?

    When I returned from visiting him and his wife, I knew this religion and I were about to part for good.

    I have had a hard time learning to just be myself, and I am certain I am not quite there yet, but I do feel better. Sorry Xena if I rattled on too much.

    "Hand me that whiskey, I need to consult the spirit."-J.F. Rutherford

    Jeremy's Hate Mail Hall Of Fame.
    http://hometown.aol.com/onjehovahside/ and [email protected]

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    Oh Xena, why are these terrible things happening to so many of us here? My heart goes out to you. Give her time, but leave her alone. She probably feels that she got to you, so I think the best thing to do is "no contact". Wait for her to call you now. Just my opinion.

    Marilyn (a.k.a. Mulan)
    "No one can take advantage of you, without your permission." Ann Landers

  • Princess
    Princess

    So sorry to hear you had such a bad day Xena. I was just thinking how neat it was to discover we have so many mutual "ex-friends". You can call me any old time. I'd love to get to know you better!

    Princess

  • terafera
    terafera

    Like so many others said here... I have felt the pain of being rejected by my family also.

    I'm new here and haven't gotten a chance to know you well, Xena, but I hope I can comfort you somehow by reminding you that in no way is it a 'Christ-like' attitude to be so hateful to your family.

    My own mother would hang up on me while I was in tears, begging for some sort of emotional or family bond. She would state that she had 'biblical and elder's backing' to not have anything to do with me anymore. She also said I was making her spiritually weak. What a crock.

    I know how much I love my siblings and my own child and there is NOTHING on this earth that could make me disown them. Makes you wonder how an institution could twist them into thinking it's the right thing to do.

    It's definitely not feeling sorry for yourself.. what you feel is totally natural. Its your sister who is acting unnaturally. As my therapist told me: "You're having a NORMAL reaction to a very UNNORMAL situation."

    My prayers and heart goes out to you.

    Love,
    Tera

  • LB
    LB

    Xena it's a damn shame things get like this. I look at people like your sister and get sick. But she's been brainwashed over the years. If they started preaching every meeting that the sky was really green, eventually she would believe that too. So of course she's been told to stay away from the likes of you. She really believes she has to.

    So, move on, enjoy your happiness and laugh all you can. Life really does get good.


    Never Squat With Yer Spurs On

  • orangefatcat
    orangefatcat

    I can relate very well to your feelings. I myself have three other sisters and a mom all staunch witnesses. I was once one mysself until I woke up to the reality of the situation. I believe that i was always the black sheep of the family, even while in the 'truth',My family has absouletly nothing to do with me what so ever. I love my family very much, but they could not see the forest for the trees, they are so wrapped up in the org. I just found out through the grapevine that according to the Society that it is now okay to pray for disfellowshipped family members. Give me a break.
    all of a sudden its okay and for how many zillions of years they said no way are u to pray for them. Oh well one more thing that seems to remind us that WT is making some changes to keep people from leaving.
    My dear friend your sister will always be you sister, but if she refuses to interact with u it is difinetly her loss. Maybe some day they will realize that they were the ones that were wrong. live for today and be happy you have many friends here. and we love ya.

  • Prisca
    Prisca

    Xena,

    Oh man I can relate to your situation. My sister isn't quite as bad but I know that she could be in an instant. They will put their devotion to what they think is Jehovah before any normal feelings for family members.

    I think you should be proud to be who you are! From what I've seen of you on this board you are one funny, intelligent, sassy lady! You have so much going for you - be strong and happy. Don't let one person get you down. I know it's hard, but there are plenty of other loving and caring people in this world who will make up for the lack of love from your sister.

    Hang in there my fluffy friend!

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