If you see a JW with a watchtower magazine and you feel the urge to take it, roll it up, and poke him in the eye with it you're likely free of the mind control but still may have some minor anger issues.
W
by cantleave 28 Replies latest jw friends
If you see a JW with a watchtower magazine and you feel the urge to take it, roll it up, and poke him in the eye with it you're likely free of the mind control but still may have some minor anger issues.
W
I think the 3 biggest hurdles when it comes to vocabulary is
1) It's not THE TRUTH
2) Not using the term "worldly" when referring to non-jws
3) Getting "jehovah" out of your vocabulary
It's a place to start. I still have to use "jehovah" when I quote from the WT which bugs me but I feel I have to adhere to what they really said. But except for that, J... is out of my vocabulary...I use the term jws to keep it out.
It's not me I'm worried about. It's my kids. I dutifully indoctrinated them to the best of my ability.
Leaving the organisation is very much a mourning process I don't think I'm quite through it yet. I know for certain that this is not God's mouthpiece on Earth and I know that they are wrong. I feel sorry for nice people who like me believe a lie but cannot see it. I don't feel sorry for those lording it over the flock since it is these very ones that help people see the light. Long may they prosper.
I feel more for other people and the impact my leaving the organisation would have on them. I am a bit like a bee in a jar desperate to be out but not yet in a position to be free.
It's not me I'm worried about. It's my kids. I dutifully indoctrinated them to the best of my ability.
I can fully relate to that. I feel so guilty that I have created baggage for my kids too.
I sit through the meeting and find just about everything funny, from the talks on the platform, what is found in the publications, to the comments the Witnesses make.
On the other hand, when I am online, I make sure that I have more than one tab open, so that if anyone comes into my room, I can quickly switch from any JW related website of forum to something else. I am getting ready to prepare a letter stating why I will never be a JW again, complete with scriptures, to present to my parents and grandmother, as well as the elders, on a moments notice.
Like Farkel, I notice I still use those certain terms to like, "truth", "brother and sister", etc. But than again, it's only been a month for me, so I have a long way to go anyway. I'm sure once I move out of my parents house and get some much needed therapy, these things will disappear as the years go by. I believe it will always be there, but won't be such a big influence on my life anymore.
I also had no problem throwing away my very first NWT Bible I had the other day. I kept it all these years, even though pages are falling out. I had no problem throwing it away along with the now old song book. I even felt regret that I couldn't throw all my NWT Bibles out, since I still have to go to the meetings. The day I move out, I'm throwing everything away.
Simple test....
Skip the Memorial. Feel Guilty?
Yes. Not broken free.
No. You are free!
It takes quite a while, it still shows up in judgements we make for years afterwards I'm afraid to say. But initial recognitions are liberating just the same.