Does anyone else have a morbid obsession?

by bulgogiboy 24 Replies latest watchtower medical

  • bulgogiboy
    bulgogiboy

    I have to admit to having developed a very strong obsession with my own mortality in recent years, since breaking free from jw doctrine. I think about death a lot, and if I really sit and think about it hard, I can freak myself out big time! I dont want to think about it, and outwardly its not apparent to other people, but it is something that seems to pervade my thinking, something that haunts me.

    Perhaps I should be excited, because I realise that on the whole what I came to believe as a jw was fabricated, and maybe there is an amazing afterlife to experience, but at the same time I do tend to agree with jws about death being the end, I just dont agree with the whole resurrection claim they add on to it.

    I have known two people who were temporarily 'dead' on the operating table, one of whom was dead for several minutes(one of these people is a friend who shrugs it off like it was nothing!). Both these people claim they saw and heard nothing, as if they were asleep. This tends to be how I view death. It terrifies me. Is this terror of oblivion the true root of all religion? Is this what causes otherwise intelligent people to be hopelessly enveloped in fundamentalist denial?

    Can anyone give me any words of hope and comfort that aren't Jesus-related? How can I best deal with this morbid obsession?

  • beksbks
    beksbks

    How old are you hon? Don't waste time on such a subject. It's that right there that is the scary part. Think of how much beautiful life can be wasted by worry! As I've said many times here, I have come to believe that death is nothing more than a big comfy bed at the end of a hard day. No alarm clock, and no one hogging the covers. Just peace.

  • villabolo
    villabolo

    Beks, I like her better with the five pounds of stomach fat. I'd love to see it wiggle.

    As for my morbid obsession, bulgogiboy, it is anything that has to do with apocalyptic subjects. Nuclear war, biological warfare and of course, Global Warming.

    villabolo

  • bulgogiboy
    bulgogiboy

    Hey, I'm 30, and thanks for your advice. I never pay attention to adverts like that so I didnt notice...

    And I think that's more than 5 lbs of stomach fat between the two pics! More like 55!

  • FreudianSlip
    FreudianSlip

    I am obsessed with thinking about my own death. It's caused me to question my agnosticism lately. I very much want to believe that something happens after we die. I have been really depressed lately and therefore thinking about the futility of life. These thoughts get worse when I am down. Down is the only direction I have been going lately.

  • villabolo
    villabolo

    FreudianSlip, I see you're from Florida. I grew up there.

    I know what it feels like to be morbidly depressed and thinking about death but I never questioned my atheism. I seem to separate my rational mind from my emotional mind. If you haven't already please seek professional help and do some research of your own on antidepressants that may be specifically suited to you.

    Hang in there girl and try to find a way out of it no matter how long it takes.

    villabolo

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    My view of death is nobody knows with any certainty what happens after you die as far as an after life is concerned although there are some stories about young children telling parents about a former life and that these children are "claimed" to know facts about about their former life that are claimed true. I haven't seen anything conclusive that makes me believe it.

    Consciousness is made possible from brain function if you take a pain killers you don't feel any pain, and when your brain stops working you are not conscious. I really don't think you are alive and conscious somewhere else. It just don't seem likely.

    To me when I die I won't know anything after my brain stops, so I'm not afraid of dying, I just don't want it to be painful, or prolonged. Or as Woody Allen said:"I'm not afraid of dying I'm afraid of the pain of dying" Seems very pragmatic to me.

  • frankiespeakin
    frankiespeakin

    Freud,

    Yeah I know what you mean depression will do that, I find that when I'm feeling good death thoughts don't even bother me, but when I'm depressed they do.

  • FreudianSlip
    FreudianSlip

    Villabolo-

    Depression isn't new to me. I've taken antidepressants off and on over the years. It's just a part of who I am. I can rationally see through my depression and I understand intellectually why I am obsessed with death. Right now I just feel lonely is all. I just don't have anyone in my life who I have a deep, emotional connection with.. and I want that so badly that I practically smother anyone who shows even fleeting bits of interest.

    Woe is me

  • beksbks
    beksbks

    FS, as I remember, you are young. Don't worry, and for heaven's sake don't obsess or let that worry affect partners. Studies show that we gravitate towards people who are happy, and make us feel good. I think we can learn to be happy. Fake it till you make it.

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