Bible student with 8 kids turns down marriage proposal?

by QuestioningEverything 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • under the radar
    under the radar

    That's got to be one of the craziest things I've ever heard! And after growing up as a Witness™, that's saying a lot.

    I have to think that in most congregations, she would have been encouraged to marry the man, if only to remove the stigma of illegitimacy from her kids. And of course, if he was supporting her and helping her get the kids to the meetings, so much the better. I wonder whose idiotic idea it was to remove a "stumbling block" before any problems ever arose. Hmmm....

    Regardless of her reasons, I believe she should be absolutely prohibited from receiving ANY kind of public assistance (welfare, child care, etc.) for those kids. She's intentionally throwing away the only help and support she's truly entitled to. Kudos to the man if he still wants to support her and the kids, but I wouldn't blame him for only doing the minimum the law requires. She appears to have rejected him solely on the grounds of his not accepting HER new beliefs for himself. She is putting the kids at risk, depriving them of an apparently loving father, and disrupting their lives... all in the name of (ugh!) religion! Such nonsense. Maybe if she now had to support those kids all on her own, without any outside assistance at all, she would wake up and see how utterly stupid her actions were. Hopefully, maybe someone with a smidgeon of good sense in the congregation will nudge her to reconsider before it's too late.

    People can have all the kids they want, but I (and all the other taxpayers) should NOT be on the hook to feed, clothe, (attempt to) educate, and otherwise support them. That's the parents' job. Abortion is a very touchy subject, but I do believe that birth control in all its many forms should be freely and easily available to all. And if people knew for a certainty that any kids they had would be THEIR responsibility, not anyone else's, it would go a long way towards cutting back on the cavalier way some pop out babies with no concern for how they're going to feed them and take care of them. I know personal responsibility has pretty much gone out the window, but I am disgusted with people who repeatedly have children that others have to care for. And I'm definitely including irresponsible fathers in this, too. I say, "If you can't feed 'em, don't breed 'em."

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    Witness 007

    I thought you were talking about Octo-mom....she's hot since she lost her fat!

    Please report to the nearest mental health clinic.

    Yer buddy,

    LWT

  • EmptyInside
    EmptyInside

    Well, whoever is studying with her had no right to influence her one way or another. But, it sounds like they did.

  • QuestioningEverything
    QuestioningEverything

    My mom is friends with the sister who studies with her. That sister, from what mom says, is all for this decision. She's probably some lonely, bitter , envious pioneer. It makes me sick to my stomach to think of what this woman is doing to her family. Hell, they've been together, unmarried for over 15 years, he couldn't be too terrible of a man. This woman has no idea that she will be by herself as long as she is a witness. Her kids are going to grow up and rebel, their dad will not be home to help out.

  • Gayle
    Gayle

    Most JWs are so short-sighted in the reality of this life. They just do not think long-term in this life and its reality. Their hope of the new world coming soon just contributes to making them escape emotionally and responsibly. How is this man going to support 'two' households?! Then, can you imagine the reality of running 8 kids back & forth between homes, and the poor kids being dragged off to at least two days a week of meetings and another day to go door to door some, plus assemblies and having two parents in totally different culture worlds? The JWs there are not going to help for long. This is disaster at the get-go!

  • moshe
    moshe

    She doesn't need a husband- if she gets married she will lose her welfare/food stamps/WIC/medicaide insurance, etc. Casear has probably been the defacto provider in that family anyway.

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    Have you ever noticed that you can take any situation and conjure up the most boneheaded and counterintuitive thing any person would do, and the JW's would applaud that action?

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    And this is just another example of the folly of living without the legal protections of marriage.

  • garyneal
    garyneal
    Casear has probably been the defacto provider in that family anyway.

    I think Moshe nailed it and I suspect that there is something else at work here that we are not seeing. I cannot imagine why anyone would be all for 'breaking up a family' unless there is a reason why. Whether real or imagined. I would not be surprised to find out that the father is still in the picture in a big way but only appeared to leave due to the woman risking losing her section 8 or some other government support.

    Can you imagine the Jehovah's Witnesses at this woman's Kingdom Hall supporting this woman financially? I think this is a clear case of 'follow the money.'

  • Scully
    Scully

    With a 7-week-old baby, and 7 other kids to deal with, I'd wager that the mom is on the brink of postpartum depression and is in no position to be making those kinds of decisions, while at the same time being extremely vulnerable to "suggestion".

    WTF... "making a stand" by insisting on legalizing the more-than-15-year relationship (obviously he's not going anywhere) most certainly under pressure from JW influence, and then when the guy - the father of her children - says sure, I'll go buy you a ring and we'll make it legal, the same effing outside JW influence tells her that her Spiritual Well-Being™ will be jeopardized if she goes through with the wedding.

    I hope someone clues her in to the fact that Spiritual Well-Being™ isn't going to feed and house her brood.

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