My Uber-Dub sister is depressed ! (page 2)

undercover

The trigger for her problem is the fact that her husband is seriously ill, and may not pull through

As Dozy said, that's enough to depress anyone, to see a spouse who is ill and dying. True, there may be other factors that make it worse, but as long as this situation exists, she's going to be going through a hard time.

Tuesday's and LWT's advice are excellent...she is going through a very stressful time and needs professional help. Anyone who is nursing a terminally ill person needs counseling and support. You're being there as a supportive family member is invaluable as well. She may get some support from the friends at the hall - not all are devoid of human emotion or lack of concern - but they're so hounded to keep their 'spiritual' schedule busy, they won't have a lot of time for her. And as Blondie said, the elders will only tell her to pray and don't miss meetings, so they won't be much use at all. Your unconditional support and love while the congregation slowly pulls away from her at this time may be the catalyst to helping her see that 'true christian love' leaves something to be desired once things settle down.

Married to the Mob

Hi Wobble

Sorry to hear about your sister an your brother in law.

A doctor can refer a patient in the uk to see a phycotherapist but as you know the NHS has very few and waiting list is well, a bit long! Any private health coverage? I am guessing from the time you said she is in the cult she is an OAP so no chance of his or her work having a crisis support line who will pay for it?? If you have this service you might be able to use your coverage for her.

Unfortunately if she is truely "uber" she probably won't want to see the physcotherapist anyway......

As undercover said, unconditional love and support is all you can do.

cantleave

Hey Wobble, Sorry to hear about your sis. I haven't got any advice as such, and there's no need to say that she needs your support at this time. I have suffered from episodes of anxiety and depression and the cause is not always the obvious but underlying anxieties that are exacerbated by an additional trigger.

Make sure you take care of yourself as well.

CL

nelly136

your sister probably didnt expect to ever be nursing a sick and dying husband, shes probably wondering why theyre not already living in paradise, its probably reminded her shes getting old. add that to the stress of being a carer its little wonder shes feeling depressed.

depending on which illness hubby has there may be services available out there for support, eg cancer mcmillan nurses, hospices which do respite relief. sometimes just getting a break from the person youre tied to caring for can take a bit of the stress off. so it might be worth checking those out to get info on who and where provides

the support your sister may have given others might have been a bit cold but that doesnt relieve her elders of finding some for her, so its only fair to ask what theyre going to be doing to assist or get others to assist, once that avenues been exhausted you can then offer info on where she can get proper support and/or maybe babysit for an hour or so here and there time permitting....even if she does use it for doorknocking going to the meeting etc

flipper

WOBBLE- I would advise your sister to get in to seeing a good therapist who will listen to her problems and assist her in a professional way. Someone liscenced with a college education trained in psychiatric professions

wobble

Thanks to all you super good people, great advice and much appreciated.

I do feel too that professional therapy is something she has needed for years, but it is the old problem, she would (will? I will try) resist, and the therapist is just not going to understand the twisted reasonong of a person who has been a fully paid up 100% believing Dub for close on 70 years.

But we must do what we can, she is at heart a very good person , just so so deluded. I will act on all the suggestions from you lovely people, and see what we can do.

Many thanks again,

Love

Wobble

noni1974

I really can't give any advice but my little sister is also an uber dub and depressed. She has been on and off for years. She takes meds for it but they don't seem to help much. My mom is bipolar and been on meds for years also with no relief. I think they both like to wallow in their misery. They don't see and therapists or anything.

My Uber-Dub sister is depressed !