Scary stuff.... I've just realized that I could be disfellowshipped at any time

Quillsky

I like to think that I have escaped the cult completely, since I, and members of my close family, faded away years ago. However, I have recently realized that my "elder" uncle, my father's older brother, could technically have me disfellowshipped, such as if he figures out that I post on an "apostate" message board (I've tried to direct my cousin here), or sees me smoking in a restaurant in the small town we all live in, or hears from my father that my boyfriend and I have been away for a weekend together.

So I've recently discovered this fear. Although I believe I'm "out" I'm still trapped in a way. I guess that I'm still technically a JW from their perspective. Does it ever end?

asilentone

da'd yourself is the only way to end the hounding of the hounders.

Quillsky

DA is not an option for me. I love my family too much, except the JW uncle.

nugget

If you have a life outside the org, and minimal association within then realistically what difference would Dfing make to your life. It seems from your post that your life does not follow the JW ideal since you have a boyfriend and smoke and your Dad seems to know about and accept it. DAing and Dfing is something that happens in their narrow world and affects how they behave. It doesn't change how you behave you have already made your choice in life.

wobble

Yes dear Quillsky,

technically they can DF anyone at any time, doesn't matter how long you have been absent from the Cult.

In practise they rarely bother years after, unless they feel you would influence someone who is in, hence the danger of directing your cousin here,be careful with that sort of thing, say you will deny it if squealed on.

Good luck, carry on as though the buggers don't exist, and enjoy your life to the full.

Love

Wobble

alanv

This is exactly why JWs are regarded as a cult. All you have done is say you no longer want to be one. You need to find out how members of the family would regard you if you did diassossiate yourself. Try showing the following quote from the Awake July 2009 page 29

Although the Bible makes a clear distinction between true and false teachings, God allows each person the freedom to choose how he or she will respond. (Deuteronomy 30:19, 20) No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family. Does study of the Bible lead to family breakup? No. In fact, the Bible encourages a husband and wife who practice different religions to remain together as a family.—1 Corinthians 7:12, 13.

You have found it unacceptable to worship the JW way. Therefore you should be allowed the freedom to live your life as you see fit Good luck.

Quillsky

It seems from your post that your life does not follow the JW ideal since you have a boyfriend and smoke and your Dad seems to know about and accept it.

That does make me seem very worldly, nugget!!

The truth is that although most of my relatives don't have the power to disfellowship me (like my uncle does) some very important people would be affected by my disfellowshipping, like my grandmother and my aunt and some cousins. That is the saddest thing to me.

Quillsky

Anyway the point is that however far you remove yourself from JW's they can always hang this sword over your head. Horrendous.

fokyc

Quillsky,

I am in a similar position, just keeping below the radar at this time.

Everyone associated with the Organisation in any way, does have the power to have you brought before a judicial committee, that is what makes this organisation so frightening.

It is as you say Horrendous

sir82

If you've successfully faded, why do you care?

Scary stuff.... I've just realized that I could be disfellowshipped at any time

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