Bullying JW's

by etna 27 Replies latest jw friends

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  etna

  I've just watched a program on TV about bullying (in Australia). And my wife and I were just commenting on how much the JW's bully so many of their followers, as in shunning disfellowshiped or disassociated ones, even ones that have faded. Their bullying tactics also invove using famiky members not to talk to them. How many of us wanted to just not be around any more, because of not feeling worthy, especially after trying to fade. I'm glad to know my wife and I are not alone in our feelings and there is so many good people out there.

  Thanks for listening. Etna
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  fokyc

  It took me many years to realize that I was being constantly bullied by the cong elders.

  After suffering severe depression in the 1970's; with a therapist we analyzed why I was so depressed,

  it was definitely 'the elders with the org'.

  They have a great deal to answer for, I could/would not step inside a KH now.
• 

  Heaven

  I experienced some of this. My parents tried to get us kids to be JWs but kids are not blinded by the bs of life like adults. We saw the wackness. We saw the untruths. Luckily the KH was not a big part of my growing up, however, I have spoken with and been around enough JWs to see things that didn't support their 'we're the happiest people in the world' mantra. I describe it as a seething anger just below the painted on happy face facade. I have witnessed this anger first-hand several times. It is quite bizarre.

  Once my folks got baptized, there was a period of fanaticism with them that created a rift in the family. My parents believed they were right and we kids were wrong. My Mom once told me that she knew I did 'bad things'. When I asked her what these things were, she couldn't tell me but she just knew I did them.

  The WTS creates 'disabled thinkers' and unprincipled, self-righteous people.
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  fokyc

  Heaven,

  The anger you describe is just so true; if and when you get on the wrong side of many elders, whow!!

  The wrath and anger comes out at such a high level, it would be unbelievable, unless you see it first hand.
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  Mickey mouse

  The WTS creates 'disabled thinkers' and unprincipled, self-righteous people.

  I think that's the best one line summation of what the WTS does to people that I've ever seen.
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  Heaven

  The wrath and anger comes out at such a high level

  fokyc... this is spot on. And with a suddeness that is very surprising and shocking because, in many cases, it is unwarranted and unexpected. My parents have done this to me and I have witnessed other JWs doing this as well. JWs do not use the space between stimulus and response to analyze what their end goal is. The result is that they alienate people. They create a wall between themselves and others that is destructive to the relationship. There is no longer trust and openness which are key to effective communication.

  The WTS creates 'disabled thinkers' and unprincipled, self-righteous people.

  I think that's the best one line summation of what the WTS does to people that I've ever seen.

  Thank you Mickey mouse. This is what I have observed and what I have experienced within my own family among the JWs. I have seen this in the stories I read here on JWN as well. One of my Mom's favourite lines used to be "What do you want to do THAT for?" in a slightly annoyed or ticked off tone. My comeback was always "Why wouldn't I want to do this?" or "What's wrong with me wanting to do this?" She was never able to answer me.

  I think most exiting JWs have to fight with this every day. Re-training and re-educating the mind is paramount. The more you work at enabling your thinking, the better you will feel. Seek help and education. These are key.
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  nugget

  I used to do research for health and safety literature and bullying comes in many forms, excluding people and sending them to coventry i.e. ignoring them and refusing to speak to them is at much bullying as beating someone up in a back alley. I was shocked to discover this and have never felt the same about shunning since.
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  Heaven

  i.e. ignoring them and refusing to speak to them is at much bullying as beating someone up in a back alley.

  nugget, this is so true. Shunning is a form of emotional and psychological abuse. It does not support anything to do with the 4 human needs. It destroys human spirit, creativity, and joy. It is not principled. The WTS is so messed up with their shunning policy.
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  designs

  Recommended reading: The Scarlett Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne

  Protestants and Catholics could be very cruel in their shunning policies. The Watchtower Society is going to have to completely reconstruct their disciplinary policies and allow modern methods of counseling in to help people who are having crises in their lives.

  'Do a little good each day'
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  ataloa

  The WTS creates 'disabled thinkers' and unprincipled, self-righteous people.

  I think that's the best one line summation of what the WTS does to people that I've ever seen.

  And that goes for other religions as well.