MY MUMS IS DIEING O F CANCER?

by mark smith 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • mark smith
    mark smith

    My mums in hospital in nottingham england she is a current JW and has stomach cancer.she is a lovley mum but has been brain washed not to have the blood so they left the opp to build her up. because she would need blood during the opp if she is weak she will die on the opp table.but she has got worse and weaker so now am losing my mum through waiting.she would have had a chance. but now it looks like she has 2 weeks of life left.why??? i ask my self. i resect her beliave in God but not the way she was brain washed. the elders had a commitee with the docters and told them what treatment she was allowed.Even her own familly was not asked i feel so helpless the wittnesses have took over they are at her bed and dont leave when i go to see her and dont leave me alone with my mum so i can say last things before she goes.
    please pray for her so she suffers as little as possible i am a christian and they treat me like some satanist but i know that Gods love is in my heart has any one in england had simalar experiences
    as i feel so helpless hurt and lonely

  • Celia
    Celia

    What ? the witnesses don't leave you alone with your mom in her hospital room ?
    And you let it happen ?
    Yell, holler, throw them out !
    She's your Mom for Pete's sake !
    And why don't you talk to the doctors and nurses?
    You are her son, you are family, the JWs just want to make sure that they have another martyr !
    I am mad!

  • LB
    LB

    Mark you might consider speaking to the doctors alone. I'm not sure how things are done in England, but over here in the states many times we can take legal recourse in such matters. Also most doctors will be able to speak to a patient alone, with no elders present. At this time they will be able to offer her treatments where no sign of blood will show up on her medical records.

    Put your foot down my friend.


    Never Squat With Yer Spurs On

  • Angharad
    Angharad

    So sorry Mark

    Maybe if you had a word with the nurses or doctors, you could them to get the JW's out, so you can talk to your mum. You are family and more rights than they do.

    Hope things work out for you.

  • AjaxMan
    AjaxMan

    Mark,

    I am really sorry about it.

    I don't know how it works in UK, but I have to agree with Angharad.

    Wish you the best.

    Ajax

    "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things and the best things never die." - The Shawshank Redemption

  • teenyuck
    teenyuck

    Hi Mark,

    I am so sorry your mother is so ill. Please accept my heartfelt sympathy.

    On the issue of you not being alone with your mother, it is as Celia and LB said. You tell them to leave. Unless your mother had a power of attorney or legal document granting them legal authority to make medical decisions, you should SCREAM! Do not put up with it.

    You, as her son, have more say than anyone, other than a spouse, in what can happen to her medically. Please talk to the doctors-alone.

    The elders or other JW's have no legal rights to be telling the doctors anything about her care. The other issue is why are the doctors discussing her illness with someone other than a family member? English law is extremely similar to US law in civil areas. This could be a breach of doctor/patient priviledge. Similar to an attorney.

    Please look into it.

    Take care, hugs

    "I used to be Snow White, then I drifted." Mae West

  • nelly136
    nelly136

    you are her next of kin not them, I'm sorry that they go
    as far as to deprive you of maybe the last chance you get
    to spend with your mum,theyve got their wishes as far as the
    blood things concerned its a shame they cant just leave you
    in peace with her,

    luv deb x
    nice to meet you wish it could have been under happier circumstances
    for you

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    Mark,

    I am so sorry for your situation.

    If, after speaking to the doctor's it is clear that without the operation she will die and that she is now too weak for the operation, INSIST that the Witnesses leave so you can have your last words.

    They are there to prevent you from going against your mum's wishes to die a JW no-blood martyr. If the situation really is hopeless ((((mark)))), then chase them away, but see if you can have the strength to use your Christian love to talk to her son to mother without the religious division coming in....

    If the situation is NOT hopeless, it's up to you to decide if you want to untie the doctor's hands legally and get her help.

    In the meantime, I'm sure we'd all love to hear you reminisce about what makes your mum lovely to you. Can't hurt. Might help.

    outnfree

    It's what you learn after you know it all that counts -- John Wooden

  • Hmmm
    Hmmm

    Mark,

    March your butt in that hospital room and tell the JWs to get the hell out, so you can have some time with your mother! Don't spare their feelings, as they're certainly not sparing yours.

    When your mother is gone (a couple weeks or a couple decades from now) you'll never regret telling those spiritual poachers to scram, but you'll regret it if you don't.

    Hmmm

  • Valentine
    Valentine

    ((((((((mark)))))))))))
    I am so sorry what you are going thru.The others here have given you great suggestions.
    I lost my dad to cancer too,it's rough.Hang in there luv,Tina

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