I've been lurking for quite a while but I finally gave in to my "apostate" heart and joined! I'm so excited!
New Here!! And finally I can post.
by Crisis of Conscience 44 Replies latest jw friends
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finallysomepride
welcome, nice to have you here
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african GB Member
welcome aboard CoC
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daringhart13
Welcome.....new myself
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yknot
I see you joined on the night of the Memorial....... (interesting!)
So whatcha been up too?
How didya find us?
Whatcha's story?
.....glad you have finally posted!......
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AudeSapere
Glad to hear a little noise from your little corner.
Welcome to JWN and looking forward to hearing your story when you are ready.
Neat nick, too!
-Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding; Dare to Thinkfor Yourself)
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Gayle
Glad to see ones coming on here!! Welcome!
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Sam Whiskey
CoC,
Great Avatar name, surprised no one else got it. Anyhow...glad you are here. Tell us about yourself...if you feel comfortable.
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Crisis of Conscience
Thank you so far everyone. It's unbelievable how good I feel right now in being here!
Sam Whiskey - Yea I was surprised that even after people having read Ray Franz's book, no one thought to use it. But I thought it described the way I'm feeling perfectly.
yknot - Actually, even despite reading the posts on the memorial, that's not what made me join on that night. I didn't even realize it until you pointed it out. But a strange coincidence I must admit. (I did attend the memorial though.)
My story in a nutshell - Currently "serving" as a MS. Former Bethelite. Recently just stopped regular pioneering. Married almost 10 years and LOVE my wife.
What brought me here was a question that NO ONE can answer. How the hillbilly does the holy spirit work?
Perhaps at another time I'll share what events led me to really ask that question. But for now it boils down to hypocrisy. How can people be involved in certain things or even act a certain way and yet be appointed by holy spirit? (This is even one of the issues I've tried discussing with my therapist.)
So I started doing research on the internet and came across this site. Scared as hell when I started reading the posts but very quickly realized that I wasn't the only one with doubts. I finally felt that people could actually relate to how I felt. We are not all zombies!! And then I got over the guilty feeling of being here really quick.
I didn't join right away though because I had told my wife about my some of my doubts and "research." She was disturbed but felt good that I wasn't directly communicating with anyone by posting. So I respected her wishes for a few months. But I couldn't take it any longer. I need an outlet.
Am I to think the holy spirit led me here to start posting? I HIGHLY doubt it. And I just refuse to believe that everyone here went apostate. I think that should be left up to perception, not upper management's judgement. And to be honest, I've come to the realization that I HATE RELIGION!!
I still believe in God though, but I believe I am becoming a bit agnostic.
Hope this helps all in getting to know me a little bit. Thanks for letting me be heard. It's actually quite therapeutic!
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allelsefails
Congrats Crisis for the freedom you found here. I feel your experience mirrors my own perfectly. I was an Elder for 6 years. Now .... Still "in" the org for the sake of my family. I have done tons of research on the origin of christian "religions" I would be happy to share if you PM me. [Just click on my name and select the "send message" button"] It really helps to talk to someone who has been thru the same type of experiences.
Some here have lost all faith in God, but I am holding on to a piece of it. Remember God does not equal religion.
Post your story (without too much personal info) when you can. I'd love to here it.
Allelsefails (when allelsefails try something that makes sense)
